Letters from Sky - Part 8

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"So, what do you think about Kaezee?
"A: Wonderful, B: Fantastic, C: Awesome, D: Amazing, E: All the above"


Letters from Sky


By Jan S

Part 8

 © 2008 by Jan S


>>Sunday, May 4th (morning)

Hi there, Marsh!!
OK, I'm all rested up, had my Cheerios (Honeynut, course), and ready to tell you all about Kaezee.

That's from her initials, but she spells it out like that but sometimes puts a capital Z in the middle, and she says the boy in her comes out if anyone thinks of calling her 'Cozy' or 'Crazy'. And the K is going to stand for Kara, which means 'beloved', which she says she is; and the 'Z' might mean Ziv, which it is and means 'radiant'; or Zoe, which is 'life' (but not with dots or an accent thing) and what her grandfather's name meant; or Zara, that's from 'Bloom'; she hasn't decided.

And she has real black hair and not nearly as curly as mine but still real curly. And she's real funny and fun and nice. We went to the mall, and I got her a t-shirt.

OK, I guess I should slow down, Mar, because even I wouldn't have understood what I was going to tell. OK. So, do this in time order (Daddy and the tutor would be so happy with me, right?).

So: Ann and Becky came over first thing that morning, and Daddy let them in, and they barged in, and I was still asleep because it was Saturday and still not even ten, but they have to get up early on their father's weekends they said but didn't say why that meant I had to, but it's OK now because it made more of the rest of the day, you know?

And Daddy said he was going grocery shopping, and I went to say good-bye, and they laughed because we didn't have any problem with what I was wearing they said, and that that was good, and it was some old shortie PJs of yours with ruffles on the bottom part legs and neck and hem, and I wear that stuff to breakfast sometimes, but not much other of that kind of thing around Daddy, because it's hard to change real quick in the morning.

Then I started to get dressed in grungy clothes, and they said no, but I was going to change in the car, because I knew what they meant by 'nice' when they said what to wear, and wanted to. But they said that people around the complex wouldn't notice because they didn't pay attention, because that was the kind of place it was, and because I'm a kid, unless you spoke right to them and, maybe, still not.

Aaarrrggh OK, I guess, if I tell you absolutely everything like this, I'm never going to get the Kaezee part, obvi, right? Arrggggh.

OK, but this is the real important stuff:

I wound up wearing the orange culottes that I wore to Lisa's last week, and the green smocked top, because I didn't think the orange went with the top they wanted and they wouldn't let me wear the tie-dyed blue and yellow T that I was going to wear, though Becky had on a T-shirt. OK, then that meant my blue and white shoes and all. And they kept looking at each other and rolling their eyes, and I told them later they should get that fixed before they rolled out because they did it a lot all day long.

But Ann said, "OK! No lunch - Shoes!!" and we all ran down the stairs, because I didn't want to risk the 'vator, and Ann drove to the smaller mall near here and we went to a store next to Bloomie's, and they had a sale -- 2 for 1 -- so I got four pairs, two thongs and two sandals. And Becky was real annoying because she kept trying to get me to get these red pumps with about eight inch heels, as if!! :-P

But later I took back the hose I got to get some that Kaezee said were better, and I did get some wedgie slide-ons with about two inch heels, and Kaezee says I've got to learn to run in them for homework; is that possible, Marsh? I also got some white flats that were like what Lisa wore to go for breakfast that time, and they all called them maryjanes, but doesn't that mean a T strap? And these just have one strap and not real rounded toes at all. And I think they are cute anyway.

Also at the Fair Trade Store I got a bag because I was making Becky carry all my stuff because I didn't want to use my backpack, and I did have pockets but real loose ones. So it's white canvass but with lots of embroidery like vines and flowers, only not quite, and as wide as a regular letter and square and a like macrame strap of different colors. And I thought it was pretty and nice because you could use it with lots of stuff even if it didn't have a real way to close it, but I don't think Becky and Ann did because they did the look-at-each-other-and-roll-eyes thing again. What do you think? Anyway it's helping someone in Bhutan, right?

Then in Bloomie's I saw a sale on these cotton skirts, and one was yellow, and I bought it because Dad gave me fifty dollars last night, and Becky had said for me to bring all my babysitting money and gift cards, and I got a blue one too because Ann and Becky convinced me. I don't know what it's called, they aren't pleated but are ruffly at the bottom but not like the bottom of tiered skirts where you can tell where the ruffle part starts real easy.

Then we got pizza at the food court because Ann was famished, and she was the one that had said shoe shopping was more important than lunch!! And she didn't want to eat and drive, so we had to hurry.

So then I changed into the yellow skirt and green and yellow thongs in the car, and Becky laughed because my boxers were longer than it, but Ann said, "It's a look. S.I.C. girls do it all the time with their kilts. They have blood, piss, or plaid boxers to buy in their uniform store." (That's the school I told you about and their colors are maroon and gold, and they wear red with yellow plaid pleated skirts, not kilts, but some people tease about it.) So I guess it was kinda OK to have them show a bit, and I rolled them into like cuffs, and they didn't show when I walked or stood, only sitting, and the skirt is short enough that it's hard to sit on it when sitting down.

And see I think what I was wearing when I got to Kaezee's is real important. Do you?

Kaezee says that's because I'm a noob, and just learned I could and even knew that I keep looking at catalogues and ebay to learn all the words, and so that clothes mean a whole lot. But I guess I could have just left out all the shopping stuff but didn't.

OK, but so anyway, we got to Kaezee's. And no one still had really told me where we were going. And she was wearing these real short and tight, pink or, I guess, faded red denim shorts and a white peasant blouse with lace but not a very low neck, and so short you could see her belly-button stud sometimes, and she ran out to the driveway when we got there.

So after a while she said, "Come on, Sky, let's go to my room." And I look at Ann, and she waves her arms like: "Go, Go." And in her room Kaezee makes me sit on the bed and sits at the desk. And she says, "'K, what you want to talk about?"

And I guess I should have said we had just been sitting in her den place that was real cluttered, not dirty, you know, just lots of stuff, on this real long couch and watching TV for almost ten minutes or more, but not really watching, and no one saying hardly anything, and I was like: "What's going on," then. And that was kind of in this basement place, but only half a basement really, just eight or so steps down, and more steps going the other way for a part that was higher than the other part of the house.

And now we were in that up part, and her room is even more messy and tiny too, and she has just a twin bed, but it's got a white canopy and a pink ruffed thing, but with books and stuff sticking out from under it, and thousands of stuffed animals and beanie babies all over. I mean really, Marsh, more than you even ever had. And Samantha, the American girl doll, was right next to her computer.

So I was sitting on the bed when she had asked that.

She has this super uber cute little dog, that's a Bichon-Maltese named Slipper, and he's hers not all of theirs, that had jumped up on the bed, and I don't know how because it was so high, but he did, and he was all licking me and wagging like crazy. And I was trying to catch him to pet, but he wiggled way too fast, though I think he really wanted me to.

And, also, that when we had first got there, we had come through the kitchen, and her Mom knew Becky and Ann already, and she told her my name and said I was a very unusual kinda girl. And I thought that was weird, and she had just met me too and stuff (OK. Now I get it too, but just didn't right away.). But her mom just said nice to meet you type stuff and smiled.

And so in her room, when she asked that, I'm like: "Nothing -- I don-no", because I still had no idea what it's about, you know?

And Kaezee said, "Ann and Becky didn't say anything?" And I shake my head, and she laughs loud and gets on the bed and grabs Slipper without any trouble, and says, "They thought you could smell me, I guess."

And I still am like: "Huh?"

And she says, "I'm a very unusual kinda girl too, Sky."

And I finally tweaked to what she meant, and I giggle and then a little more and then, you know, couldn't stop.

And she giggles too and then laughs and says that Ann and Becky are idiots and shouldn't have done that to us, because she thought that I'd told them I wanted to meet her and all, but for me to talk to her anyway. And I pointed at her shorts, and was still like I couldn't talk because I was giggling but also because I was just real embarrassed too. And she thought I wanted her to prove it, but laughing still, and I managed to say, "Bulges?" And said, "OH, yeah - tuck and tape."

And I told her about the paper you sent me and stuff, and we talked about you and Daddy and her folks too, and about Ms Y. And about the belt things which is what she uses almost always too, but says that it's different than the instructions because boy dancers want to look like they got more for one or both of two reasons, not less; and I told her I did it different too.

She showed me how she has it done and then helped me do it, and she said that the trick was to get the 'little buggers' trapped in their home, and it just takes practice, and she put the tape on for me that time, and I left it to get used to.

And, Mars, we talked about how I'd let her do that too. I mean she didn't touch anything just slapped the tape down, but she could see. And I said how even when you and Michael would go in the sprinklers I wouldn't, even when I was little. And she says that's because around one group we don't look right, and feel weird, and around one group we know it isn't right, and they're acting weird, and around both groups it would just be confusion which to feel, maybe. And that we always knew it, inside. But with each other it's OK. And in that way we're a third gender, but we really, really aren't.

And she also said that it was OK because I wasn't at all her type anyway. And I asked if she meant she liked girls, and she said, "Hell NO! I ain't gay! Not that there is anything wrong with that." And I laughed like mad because -- you know.

OK, and let me see, we talked about how I'd used the Nair stuff on my legs and pits, and that got us to school because she asked if I was scared about the locker rooms, and I told her about getting kicked out, and she said that, yeah, the teacher's were just real intense on their kids just before those tests and wouldn't have wanted a new kid that needed to catch up, and she was sort of like what I had thought about that, but seeing it in a better way for the teacher's, and that was probably right, but still unfair to me, and she agreed too.

And she said about how she got lonely and things all the time, or used to, too. And, you know, just all kinds of things and lots. And boys and girls too. And Zack.

And, oh yeah , she goes to Westcott Hall. And Becky and Ann go there too, and I didn't even know that. And she says the school knows she's "a very unusual kinda girl" but not all the teachers, she doesn't think, and only some of the kids but that it is OK, and she is in tenth grade and already sixteen, and she's got a brother that is just started in medical school, and a sister that is in college for the second year, and a little brother that is fourteen and an eighth grader and has the hots for Becky (and she's in ninth, which is older than I thought. So he is fat out of luck.), and a little sister that is nine and in third, but she doesn't know Wendy.

So, yeah, a huge family, but she called me her new sister then, and I said I didn't really think so, and she said that I could be a part time sister and that was OK with her, though some of our sisters didn't all think so. And we talked about dressing in girl's clothes to pretend and to not even really pretend, but to be a boy that everyone knew was in a dress, and to do it because it felt good sometimes but it not be for always. And I kind of thought that that was me, but she didn't really think so I think, but I don't know. And I said I mainly liked to be a girl when it was to do real fun things, because then they were fun-er always, or if I just felt like real bad or alone.

And she told me we had brothers too, and neither one of us could really figure out why, but it takes all kinds.

And Ann came up and knocked on the door, and we had been it there way over two hours by then. But Kaezee said stay out because we weren't decent. We had clothes on and stuff by then, but just she was hugging me because we were talking about the scars on my stomach and the stuff that happened back then.

But she grabbed me and tried to tickle me to stop me crying; that doesn't work, but it did a bit, and put some eyeliner on me and some lipstick too real, real quick. It wasn't my color she said but it would have to do, and she said to tell Ann and Becky that we had just been talking about make-up and hair and stuff because, though they were real, real nice, they just couldn't really get everything we had talked about and were even smart enough to know that, but that I didn't really want the questions from them trying to figure it out. Which was real true!

OK, Marsh, I know this is like the longest letter in the history of the world (I should call Guinness's maybe?), but I really want to tell you about all of yesterday, OK? Because it was just -- just because. You don't mind, do you? I guess you can take a break or something, right?

You just have a chatty little sister sometimes, I guess, and I guess I'm your sister right now because I still got on your old pink baby-doll PJs, and I think I still smell like lavender a little bit too. But I have to tell you why yet.

OK, I'll try to speed it up some. OK, the rest real fast, OK?

We all decided to go see a movie, and Kaezee had to convince her parents; and her little brother (only lots bigger than me) was talking to me about school and stuff because he had been watching TV with Becky and Ann all this time. So I just told Scott, that's his name, that I didn't know where I was going next year, and he's going to be a freshman at the Hall but just starting, and I just said I was doing work for my old school right now and stuff. But when Kaezee came back she told him to stop trying to make Becky jealous by hitting on me, and that made both of them mad, but more embarrassed, you know, and me too. And she stuck out the tip of her tongue and wiggled her eyebrows up and down, and nobody could stay that way with her, not even Scott very much.

So we all went to the big mall, not Scott, just us, and he was mad because Kaezee got out of going to see their Grandparents. And Kaezee has to go tomorrow, which is today now, and she has to go in disguise because, even though they know about her, she doesn't make them see it. And we got to the Mall and did more shopping, and I got two more tops (Both were on sale. OK?), one's a peasant blouse like Kaezee was wearing but with little blue and yellow threads in the seams all over, and the other a teal T that has shell sleeves and a round collar and is tighter than regular ones. And I also got a skirt just like the one I wore to breakfast that time with Lisa and Wendy. You know, the long one that looks like it's a slip with lace on it, but it's really not?

And we went to the store that was the same as the store in the little mall, and they would let me have my money back for my hose, only buy something else, and they didn't have control tops in my size, and I probably will have to go on line for them, and Kaezee says to use 'em even though it's not my tummy that needs to be controlled. And that's why I got the other shoes there.

Then we had dinner.

Oh, listen, I wanted to get that T in pink, a real kinda bright hot pink, and no one would let me! They said that wasn't my color at all, and they kept doing that all the time when we looked at stuff that wouldn't even show, or we weren't really going to buy, and said I could wear mild pinks if it wasn't very much only. And so do you think that's so?

But after the movie we went to a sports store for just girls, and I got two pairs of these things called spirit shorts, that are like what cheerleaders wear when they're not built into the skirt, and so you don't have to worry so much about your skirt showing something with other things because they are thicker or you wear them over panties, though they look just like they are them, or something; I don't know why, but it's OK to show them, maybe just 'cuz cheerleaders do all the time. And when we were looking at them, Kaezee said they were good for keeping Jack and Bill where we wanted them without taping them down, and she said it right out in front of this sales girl that wasn't very friendly, and she just thought Kaezee just meant our boyfriends and the shorts were sexy, at least I hope so anyway, so it was really funny. And so I got a blue and a pink pair, and that was the only time they let me get pink all night.

I had got shrimp quesadilla for dinner. You ever had that? It's good. I think they must do Mexican food out here because the sushi isn't so good. But Ann says she knows of real good places and is going to tell me where, so maybe we just haven't found them yet. But Kaezee has never even had sushi and won't try it! She just eats tempura and stuff there.

And we went and saw "Maid of Honor," and it was OK, I think, there were real funny parts, but Kaezee and I kept talking so much the olds around us kept shuss-ing, and we finally moved to a part without people around, and even Ann and Becky wouldn't come with us. We were just making fun of the movie and talking about the actors and other actors and stuff, you know, but we held hands and leaned on each other the whole, whole time, and had even when shopping too. But it wasn't like holding a boy's hand -- I mean like dating holding hands; just we wanted to do that.

And when we went to the bathroom I told her about what Daddy said about it being best and OK where you were most comfortable, and she liked that a lot, but said it could make other people uncomfortable, but they didn't have a reason and about lesbians anyway, and it really just being their prejudice that made them not comfortable anyway, not the people. And it is weird and a half going pee when taped down the first time, but you probably didn't want to hear about that, huh?

But OK anyway, I'm almost done, Marsh. Just one more thing to tell about.

After the movie we got drinks at the food court, and I saw an instant T-shirt place. And I snuck away with Ann, because I was using her charge card for everything by then, and got Kaezee a T-shirt that says "A Very Unusual Kinda Girl" on it, and when I gave it to her she pretended to sneak off (but I knew what she was doing. Duh.) and got me one too! And I'm going to wear it today when I go to bicycle with Lisa and a friend of hers, and they got mine in sky blue (my color, with greens) and with bright yellow letters, and Kaezee's is pink (because she wouldn't let me get any for myself, and it is her color already), with blue. And the letters are scrolly and like cursive. Pretty neat, huh?

But Kaezee had snuck off for real, and got me some Mr Bubble lavender scent while we were looking at lip glosses because, see, she had told me the best way to get the tape off of there was in the shower, but the better, nicer way than that was to do it inside a warm bubble bath.

So now I get to buy her something else real soon. But right now I'm broke totally, and owe Ann like thirty bucks.

Then we drove everybody home, and the security guard guy at the apartment was out front, and he helped me get my stuff into the elevator and didn't even act weirded about what I was wearing because I'd forgot to change.

Then I ran in like I had to go to the bathroom and had to put on some basketball shorts because Daddy was watching TV. But it was already real late so he didn't mind not talking much, and I took a bubble bath and got on your PJs (Pink!!) and then remembered to write and tell you stuff last night, but was too tired to say it, and waited 'til this morning to tell you everything, everything. And I really hope you don't mind too much, because it was like getting to do it all again a little, you know?

Anyway, I'm so sorry for being so -- what's that 'verb' word? Dinosaur book time. -- You knew I meant 'thesaurus', right? Sounds like a dinosaur's name, right? So 'verbose' was what I was thinking of, but can I be 'loquacious' instead? I like how it sounds better.

OK, so I got to get dressed. I'm still in my PJs, and I'm going to wear my blue skirt and the pink spirit pants to bicycle with them. And my Unusual Girl shirt too!!

Bye, Marsh
Your little sis (since I'm still in my nightie),
Skye
& Loves and Hugs!!

P.S.: And, Marsh, I was kinda all weirded at the start in the morning, but I just am not any more.

Don't let anyone else know, OK?



>>Sunday, May 4th (almost ten minutes later)

So, what do you think about Kaezee?
A: Wonderful, B: Fantastic, C: Awesome, D: Amazing, E: All the above
:-)))


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Comments

Fascinating way to tell a story

Hi Jan, I think this is a really fascinating way to tell a story. We can only see half of the conversion, and that half is told from an adolescent's point of view in their own language and style, as they are discovering themself and getting to know their new friends. The way that all the words tumble out in a rush is very convincing. Of course being limited to just Skye's narrative is a great way to allow us to only see parts of picture, so I'm eagerly looking forward to reading more to find out the background of Skye's dysfunctional family and how his or her future is going to unfold.

Pleione

You tempt us with dribbles of semi-info, TEASE!

What operation/operations did he/she have and why? He/she was showing the other *unusual girl* his/her tummy scars from the surgery.

What kind of operation would a child of that age have in the abdomen? A cancer tumor? Appendices but one that ruptured thus requiring a big incision and thus the major scars? Exploratory or experimental surgery to fix his/her confused reproductive system? He seems to like being a girl almost too easily. Is he TG or interexed or really a biological girl that needed her *plumbing fixed* and they are doing it in stages? The mom’s odd reactions to this one child of hers and neither of the others is still troubling. Had she been feeding him hormones or worse, did she hurt him, thus the surgery? She did damn near scalped him, what was that all about?

You have me guessing, you sneaky writer you.

Loved the interacions between the kids.

John in Wauwatosa

John in Wauwatosa

Girl or Boy

terrynaut's picture

Skye is getting increasingly girlie in this nice little tale. I hope she's protected from her mom if they ever meet again. I expect her mom will go crazy.

Kaezee sounds like a good role model for Skye. I look forward to seeing the trail blazed. :)

Thanks again and please keep it comin'.

- Terry

A bit lost...

I think I was tracking well with the earlier parts of the story (1-4?): the babysitting job; the babysitting employer (Ms. Younger) with the mistaken impression that her babysitter ("Judey") was a girl; Jude figuring it out and setting her straight, but her telling him to keep it from her daughters; her daughters figuring it out, and them keeping that from mom; and the truth finally coming out to everyone. Then the story becomes much more complex with family history (we learn about a very ugly divorce), a neighbor's two daughters, and events at school. As Jude attempts to make sense of the chaos (parts 5-7), the gender and crossdressing stuff seems to fade into the background, and pretty much go on holiday. Though we are told that he was getting a little more comfortable with dressing, I also seem to recall that he was concerned about his father seeing it, and that he wanted to explain to the neighbor's daughters how he sort-of became entangled, that he wasn't doing it entirely of his own volition.

Imagine my surprise, then, when the neighbor girls show up at Jude's apartment early in the morning, dress him in culottes and a blouse, take him shopping for skirts, dresses, and heels at the mall, take him to meet "another very unusual kinda girl" like him, followed by more shopping. In Jude's words, "I was all like, HUH??" To be more specific, "Wow!! Isn't this public shopping excursion in total comfort while totally cross-dressed rather sudden?? How did we get from there, to here?" As I say, I'm just a little bit lost...

Molly

"Sometimes, I just can't help myself!" -Babs Bunny

Molly

"Sometimes, I just can't help myself!" -Babs Bunny