Becoming Sarah Part 6

James was enjoying walking a nice pace stroll back to his dorm room while under the light of the full Hunter’s Moon. He was just happy to be and was going to savor the joy of being happy for the sake of happiness. The man who just got more in touch with his real self just felt alive. This feeling of being alive came from him forgetting to take off the prosthetic vagina Lilith bought him to make him pay for thinking he could feel like a female by just dressing like one. His vigor for life was not brimming of energy which people have when they are full of life. It was James was slowly becoming self-aware of who she . He was finally looking behind him to see exactly what was casting the shadows on the cave’s wall and liked what he saw.

For the first time in his life James was in tune with his surroundings. James just felt all of his senses were better: his eyesight was clearer, he really notice the detail of the lion statue in front of the campus entrance. His sense of smell was crisper, he liked the light scent of pumpkin and nutmeg he noticed when a lady holding a coffee walked by him. His touch more deft, he felt the unevenness of the dirt path he took. His hearing was more profound, he could had counted the crickets’ chirps if he so choose to and lastly his taste was more refined, he notice the gentle sweetness of the apple he was eating on his way home.

James’ state of being connected to the moment and having his senses more fine tune came from him having his guard down about Sarah. For first time in his adult life James had full use of his mind, instead of parts of his subconscious maintaining an tower of iron will to keep Sarah in. He also did not have to deal with Sarah trying to thrust into his mind to peak at what was happening.

James’ enjoyment of just being was contagious to others. His smile and positive outlook infected anyone who saw him. One of the symptoms was goodwill towards others. The people James wished a good evening to was just as sincere as him in their wishes backed. If patient zero would had wander around campus, instead of returning to his dorm room, that night there would had been an outbreak of unbridled happiness.

The last person James infected with happiness was Dillon. James’ roommate felt an aura of positive emotions radiating off of James and that made the smile on his face get a little bigger. Then with Dillon gettings feeling for James, his presence magnified the farm boy’s smile even more.

James crossed his legs as he sat on the edge of his bed closest to Dillon’s bed. The man who was not really a man was so excited to share with his friend the great news; Cara and him was finally going to have a date. Dillon reaction was not the normal one from someone who found out the person they had a crush on had a date with someone else. He was genuinely happy for James, he knew that Cara was the best person for James. Plus James was straight, Dillon knew he had no chance.

While being crier of the good news from Jamestown, he person who was happy did not even notice how much Sarah was in charge. The lady living inside his head had James be more animated while talking. Sarah also made contact with Dillon’s knee with James’ hand. Feeling her touch made Dillon feel all warm inside.

After talking some more James excused himself to go to the men’s room. He saddle up to the urinal, unzipped his pant and went to pull out his penis. James was a little startled when he felt his groin being smooth and soft plastic instead of skin down there. He laughed to himself when he realized that he forgot to take off Lilith’s surprise. Without giving it a second thought, he just went to a stall to piss.

The true essence of James, Sarah, was relieved that James took still having a vagina like it was nothing. Even with it being a prosthetic one, the lady, who was ready to be in charge of her life, knew that was a big step. It showed her that James was not defensive of their manhood.

As James sat down to pee, it felt natural to him. Part of the reason was for he relieved himself in that manner before as Sarah. James also liked the peace and quiet which came along with sitting down. That splashing noise from a man standing was not there. Finally, he could really relax when urinating. Overall in his mind it was just better to sit when nature called and knew he was going to from now on.

The man who was becoming not scoffed when he thought about how most men would be scared to sit while peeing. They would not admit it and just say men stand. The man seeing life from a new perspective knew it was them just protecting their fragile male ego. They would not dare sit and if they did would hate that they found out it was a better manner to spend a penny.

*********

“What!? I thought we were going to hang out, not go out on dates.I would also never had thought of you as the type to play matchmaker.” Cara said to her friend.

Lilith news of having a double date was unexpected to Cara. She did not agree to let her friend play matchmaker with her, so why would she do so. Plus, Lilith was against being set up on dates. It reminded her too much of arranged marriages. The feminist believed that people should find who they were going to spend the rest of their life with on their own, not have a busy body do it for them.

Lilith could tell by the tone of Cara’s response to her news her friend objected to the idea more than she anticipated. The lady who was trying to be the thorn in James’ side knew one of the reasons were her actions were out of character. This made her friend leery. She surmised that Cara’s opposition also came from her having stronger feelings for James than Lilith knew.

Lilith had to make the date seem less as a date than just hanging out with a couple of guys. “Cara, you are right I am not the type to play matchmaker. I should had been clearer. I have a chance to see a man I am interested in and just wanted it to be in a more casual setting. You know, so it is easy to to let him down if I am do not find him what I thought he was.It would really help me out”

The reasoning behind Lilith’s cover story showed why her conviction about James being wrong with his Women’s Study project were so strong and unmoving. She could not, for a moment, think that she was wrong or the reason something didn't go right. The lady with a too high of an opinion of herself knew It would be crazy for her to think if the man she was using to get Cara to go on a double date would not want to be with her.

In her eyes Lilith could have any man she wanted eating out of her hand. Having that high opinion of herself was right. She had a body like a mountain road; long, curvy, and dangerous. Her words were like antifreeze: could thaw any cold heart, sweet and deadly. Lastly her point of view needing a man like a fish needs a bicycle made think that having one was a frivolous. The lady did not emotionally invest herself in the relationship so she could easily move on from it at any point. That made it so she would never compromise so she only stayed with men who would eat out of her hand.

Lilith could see that Cara was still dithering on whether to say yes or no. The lady who needed a yes for her plan to work knew that even with her helpful attitude Cara was still hesitant to say yes. To move the scales in her favor Lilith played on their friendship. “Come on Cara, helping each other out is what friends do. It is only a date, nothing major.”

As the reluctant friend gulped once Lilith knew she played her friend. “OK Lilith I will go. Just from now on please no more setting me up. Also do not tell Sarah”

Lilith got what she needed from Cara to start her new plan to get back at James so she quickly excused herself “Thanks and I will not ask you to be set up a date and not tell Sarah. I am getting used to calling him Sarah, it is starting to have me see him as a female . I am going to get to bed.”

Lilith words was factual but not truthful. She would never ask Cara to be set up again. The next time Lilith was going to spring the date on Cara at the last and most inopportune moment. Also she will not tell James but would make sure he knew

*********

Lilith was now onto the second part of getting her plan to drive a wedge between Cara and James, getting him over there on Saturday. With her luck it was simple, Lexi boyfriend, Ryan “The Gord” Gordon, was going to be busy all that weekend with Hell Week for the potential new members of his frat. Lexi would have no plans so the devious lady would just suggest to her to invite James over. The lady who was cutting herself off from her friends knew that her target would jump at the chance of playing dress up more.

Lilith did not know who she found more annoying, The Gord or James. Yes James was making a mockery of the essence of womanhood, but still he was only doing so for he did not understand what it was to be a female. The Gord on the other hand, he was a frat brother. To this modern woman, fraternities and the Greek system were one of the worst aspects of the patriarchal society which was holding down true equality.

After thinking of how a member of a fraternity was three times more likely to commit rape, depended on money to buy friends and used the old boy network to advance each other in the professional world it was no contest. She found The Gord way more annoying. How could she not, Lexi’s boyfriend was the antithesis of herself.

The morning after setting Cara up on a date, Lilith and Lexi were the last two in the apartment. When Lilith approached her roommate sitting at the dining table, she was greeted with a look as cold and dark as a clear night in February. That did not affect Lilith one bit for she knew that a hater had to hate, plus Lilith knew she could thaw Lexi’s feeling towards her with sweet words and actions..

Lilith started to butter her second pawn up “Good morning Lexi, I am going to make coffee, want me to top your cup off.”

“No, I am going to get going to class very soon.”

“I know you still have an hour before you need to go. We can chat a little. With how busy we both have been we had not spent any one on one time. Come on, it will only be 15 minutes.”

“No thank you.”

As Lilith was pour her cup of liquid wake me up she said kept on talking to the uninterested listener. “Like I was saying to Cara yesterday, I see what James, sorry I mean Sarah is trying to do. I know I had been too harsh. I am coming around and changing my attitude towards this project.”

Hearing that her friend saw the error in how she was treating Sarah perked Lexi’s attitude to talking with Lilith “Yeah it would be nice to procrastinate starting my day a little longer. Please get me some more coffee.”

“Good, now tell what me you and the The Gord have planned for the weekend?”

Lexi was liking her feminist friend’s attitude, she knew her boyfriend was not Lilith’s favorite person. Lilith was respectful of Lexi’s choice in a boyfriend but would always call him Ryan and used a neutral tone when he was the topic of the conversation. The lady who had a grievance about all boys clubs was using a positive tone in her voice talking about him. Plus Lilith used Ryan’s nickname, Lexi knew Lilith was finally trying more to like her man.

Lexi understood Lilith dislike of frats, for most of the guys in them were jerks. The Gord was different in Lexi’s eyes. He joined for he was a legacy, his father, brothers, uncles, male cousins and grandfather were all members of Alpha Sigma Sigma. Yeah he acted like he was part of the herd when with his frat brothers, that was just so he could network with them later on in life. There was no way the caring sensitive man she loved really shared the herd mindset the rest of those boys did.

“Nothing Lilith, he is going to be busy playing with his he man woman haters club all weekend long.

I think I will try to hang out with Cara on Saturday night”

“Lexi, you know I said that in jest about frats and never used it once you started dating The Gord. It is important for those men to have their secret orientation rituals to form their brotherhood. I should not had been so harsh on the Greek system our freshman year.

You will not be able to hang out with Cara, she and I have a double date on Saturday. Don’t say anything for you know how Cara gets before going out with a man the first time. You should give Sarah a call and have her come over here. I know she wants to be as comfortable as she can be in those clothes and having some more time would help. She is taking this project serious and that is why I am changed my mind about it.”

“That is a great idea hanging out with Sarah and I will keep quite about the date.”

As those two finish their coffee Lexi was glad to see Lilith fun side out. Lexi loved her friend but felt she needed to be not so serious about the issues in life all the time. Lilith should lighten up more often and people would understand her concerns for how important they are. Lilith might be theoretically right but life is so far beyond just being black and white in which those theories need to work.

Lilith was more relaxed with the response she got from Lexi. It felt great that the lady she was using as a tool was so gullible to buy the story she was sold. Lilith had to do everything in her power to not laugh. It felt good that she figured out how to get James back for the affront he was doing.

********

Lexi was true to her word and did not bring up the double date to Cara. Even with not bringing it up with her roommate, there was a couple of things a little off about the date to Lexi. She knew how close Cara was getting with James finally those two were going to have a date. Why would Cara take a chance of ruining it by going out with someone else? The only logical reason why Lexi came up was Cara agreed to this before she thought she had a chance with James and also wanted to keep her word.

The other abnormal factor about the double date was Lilith was going on it also. Lilith was the last person she thought who would go with such a stereotypical rite of passage. Double dates were to mask that there was no real connection between one of the couples. Lilith wanted relationship to form from the people having a connection not that the people had connections with other people in the group.

Lexi chalked Lilith acting out of character as her friend growing by trying new things. Lilith was showing she was open to it by changing her attitude towards Sarah. Plus it was a huge step for Lilith to call The Gord by his preferred name. It just had to be Lilith was not so rigid about her views on life. Maybe Audrey’s little chats with Lilith was finally breaking through that woman stubbornness.

Lexi was able to set aside what she found odd about the date for she looked for reasons for her assumptions to be right, instead of the truth. Lilith was depending on Lexi to give the benefit of the doubt. The truth was too easy to see if anyone was looking for it and If Lexi knew the truth she would had put an end to it right away.

************

Lilith made sure she was not at the apartment when Sarah came over on Saturday. She might be able to act like she had no issues with what Sarah was doing while interacting with her roommates. The lady with strong convictions could not hide her true feelings in front of the perpetrator of the offense for more than a short period of time. She would have had to show her contempt.

The lady who was pulling the strings also needed to arrive while Sarah was already there for her plan to work. How else could she announced to Cara to hurry up they were running late for their date if they were not. How else could she had used the benefit of the doubt her friends were giving her to make it look like an innocent accident. She needed to look innocent so her puppets would not see how she was manipulating them.

This was the first time Sarah was walking to the apartment as her true self. People who were walking past the lady, who was out in daylight for the first time, did not know what was shining brighter, her smile or the autumn sun. Wearing baggy cargo pants and a sweatshirt did not matter to Sarah. She was out and in charge, and freedom tasted too great to worry about how she looked. Plus her drab wardrobe was going to change soon and she would look how she felt..

Wearing the prosthetic vagina made it easy for James to let Sarah out of her cage. The hastening of Sarah becoming acclimated to the world was a huge benefit of Lilith’s surprise. This was for Sarah’s mental makeup, she was a survivor. Lilith’s attempts at knocking Sarah down was giving the fighter more resolve to be. She went into hiding to bide her time so she was in the right point of her life to be herself with a good support system.

That period of self imposed exile was because Sarah knew it would had been a losing fight with her father, Marcus. Marcus was as socially conservative as people came. He could not understand that people were different. It was impossible for him to see that people could legitimately have a different point of view than him. He would had done everything in his power to make Sarah say over and over again that she was not real.

Sarah was strong enough to wait, she knew burying her real self was not the ideal choice. It was just the best choice out of all the options. If she was not as strong as she was she would have had a nervous breakdown by now.

Living a lie to yourself was the worse torture a person put themselves through. All that pressure to put on a performance day in and day out would had made a lesser person crack. They would had needed to break free. The secret to Sarah’s survival was she knew the big picture and aimed for the long term goal. To be herself

The strong and soon to be independent lady made it to the girl’s place and was greeted by two friendly faces and one huge hug. After the giggle twins were done greeting each other, Lexi then gave her friend a hug. Before Lexi could offer their guest a drink, Sarah and Cara was heading off to transform Sarah’s appearance to match who she was.

While in Cara’s room Sarah complemented her friend on the outfit she was wearing. It was a tight black midiskirt and a black mesh. Sarah’s look of desperately wanting Cara was what made her blush more than the kind words. Cara knew that the lady she was sweet on was attracted to her personality, she also wanted Sarah to find her pleasing to the eyes.

The warm fuzzy feeling inside Cara soon left after her response to Sarah saying she was going to break men’s hearts with how she looked. The girl who thought she was helping out a friend felt guilty in not revealing the date. To Cara it was not really a date so it was not worth telling Sarah.

Bringing up the date and explaining it was only to help Lilith would had cause more harm than good. Cara knew that Sarah James would had worried about competition for Cara’s affection. Cara was notorious for going on a blind date and ending up being in a long term relationship with the fellow. It was for she wanted to give any man more than one chance to show her the best side of him. Then when she got to know those flawed men she believed she could help them become better people. That lead to many tears following from her eyes from being with the wrong man and never being with the person she fancied, Sarah James.

Cara asked Sarah if she wanted some privacy after they decided Sarah would wear part of her Sunday brunch outfit a red silk blouse with ruffles and black skirt. Sarah asked “why?”

Cara blushed again thinking of the person she wanted to see naked and said “You know so you can change. You need to put on.. I can’t believe I am going to say this… your vagina.”

Sarah “Oh no, I wore it over. I forgot to take it off on Thursday night.”

Cara was curious to know what Sarah’s neither regions looked like said. “Sarah with you not really going to be naked do you mind if I see what it looks like on you? I will understand if you do not want me to. A lady should be modest.”

Even with Sarah wanting to know Cara better, she did not mind. Women see each other naked all the time. “I don’t mind, it is not like I am going to show you something you do not see everyday.”

Cara looked at Sarah’s naked body and when she saw Sarah’s groin area she yearned to be physical with her friend. This wanting was not just for pleasure, it was to make the bond between them better. The reaction to biblically know someone with a vagina was foreign to her. Cara did not know the feeling came from whose body it was and not the body itself.

Sarah saw the lust in Cara’s eyes and loved it. The temptress wiggled her hips a little to entice her friend to think about how great it will be when they finally were together in bed. Cara blushed even more and jokingly said stop that you vixen. They both knew that Cara did not want Sarah to stop but the joke did break up the sexual tension between them.

*********
Lilith was on the patio of the bar across the street from the apartment complex she lived in when Sarah arrived. It was a huge relief for she in a couple of minutes could finally go back to her flat. The one drawback to her plan was she had to be out and about dressed to impress. Tight leather pants and crop tee to show off her stunning physique. A lady by herself at a bar, even in the early evening, drew every man who believed they were a cassanova to make a comment. She did not want to suffer fools but bit her tongue. Lilith needed to be upbeat when she crushed James’ heart for her pawns not to figure out what she was doing.

After waiting for the longest 15 minutes in her life, Lilith made her way back home. She rushed into the apartment to act like she was in a hurry and loudly said “Cara come on we are running late for our dates. We do not want to have those men waiting for us.”

Hearing those words broke the heart that James and Sarah shared. Those words changed the meaning behind Cara’s replied to Sarah asking her out on a date. It went from the truth, Cara just wanted to wait to after the project was over to her friend was letting Sarah down nicely.

Sarah could not blame her best friend. Cara always dated men and showed no inkling to wanting to be with a woman. Even with the good reason of not being the right gender, Sarah was disappointed. Everyone was disappointed the first time they get rejected and they could not do anything but show it. Cara saw the sadness overtake her friends face and said “I can explain.”

Sarah knew that if Cara would explain right then she would cry. If her friend would leave now, Sarah would be able to pull it together by the time she was done with her make up. “Cara there is no need to explain, You get going. Have a great time on your date.”

Sarah was too upset to notice the sigh Cara let out as she was leaving her room. Cara knew that her friend needed time to regroup and the next time they were alone she would be able to clear it up with Sarah. On the way out to the date the person who was being the weapon used to hurt Sarah said to Lilith “You knew full well Sarah was here when you said that, we will talk about this!”



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