You're Not a Man, You're a Woman Part 1

Author's Note: A special thanks to everyone who has helped me.

Chapter 1
Shelly was daydreaming about that fateful date as she was doing the dishes.She thought of that day,May 5th 2012, everyday of her life since it happened. That date changed her destiny and everyone in her life made sure she would never forget it.. The constant reminders most of the year were subtle or just a normal part of her life. It was with people calling her Erica, her name was Shelly and hated that pet name. It was the comments about her outfits, how pretty, cute or sexyshe looked in them. Shelly enjoyed looking and being pretty, cute or sexy, but the tone of the complement made sure she knew they were backhanded. Those comments made sure this insecure woman knew she had no right to want to be pretty, cute or sexy, let alone be as pretty, sexy and cute as she was.

Now, with the anniversary coming up the reminders were more in your face.People told her so she could in the right frame of mind to celebrate that day. It was not a special day , all that date did was made Shelly think even more of the biggest mistake of her life. That outfit she wore that day would be pull out and shown to her like it was a relic. Her friends would bring up how special that day was going to be for Erica. She hated that they call her Erica, her name was Shelly.

One of them, Marla, did call her Shelly when she could get away with it; but those poor two friends are not allowed to hang out together for they were bad influences on each other. The only trouble those two got into was they laughed and was happy when they were not supposed to be. There was nothing wrong with making someone feel good about who they are, even if most of the world did not think they had the right to be happy.

Her friends; they were not friends, just people in the same situation as her. They were all happy with the circumstance of their life but Shelly was not. Those ladies were even happy when they were made to feel like less of a human for being who they were. They believed that they deserved the mocking,ridicule and humiliation. To them it was some sort of penance for just being ladies.

At one time Shelly also felt that she had or pay penance, but the reason was for hiding the type of lady she was to all those close to her. The reformed wrongdoer felt she made atonement for that sin a long time ago. This did not matter for the person who could redeemed her felt otherwise and Shelly was stuck until she got absolution from her,

By the time Shelly absolved herself of her misdeed, it was too late to go back to her old life and was not in the situation to start a new one. She was a pariah to her old friends. They felt that Shelly did not have that much in common with them anymore when they found out what type of woman she was. She could not blame them for the negative connotation which society gave a woman like her.

A new life just could not happen now. She would save up money, then a new expense would come up and eat away at her savings. Her new friends were not friends who could help her get into a more fitting situation for a woman of class, like her. Even if they could they would not, they could not phantom the notion that a woman like them could be classy.

Those new friends, Shelly hated how materialist those ladies were. They were more concerned about the label on their clothes and accessories than how they looked or felt. The practical dresser could not stand hearing the fashion slaves raved over a plain black skirt by Channel which cost 10 times more than the one she picked up at Target. They looked the same.

What Shelly hated the most was how they would joke about each other behind their back, it was so catty,.They would just say mean and nasty things as jokes behind the back of one of the members of the group. It would become so common the coven of bitches would just start to say those nasty thing to the person face and said it was in jest.. Shelly nor Marla never went along with that childish game.

Her place in life, was summed up by those words she heard when she knew her life was going to change for the worse. Those words you are not a man, you are a woman always echoed in her head when she got preoccupied by how that fateful day affected her life. Those words carried so much more meaning than their face value.

Chapter 2

“ You are not a man, you are a woman!” Donna Coffey screamed as she walked in on her husband, Eric, all dolled up. Eric was in a short black pleated mini skirt, a bright pink halter top which showed way too much of his midriff and cleavage and 5 inch pumps

Eric could not believed that he got caught dressed by his wife. He was so careful, always made sure she was not coming home for home before he changed into something he felt was more suited for who he really was. He hid his stash up in the attic where his wife would never go for her phobia of bats she did not want to take the chance of seeing one up there.. He did not shave his legs or pluck his eyebrows. It was just bad luck he got caught, she came home a day early from her weekend getaway with the girls.

The hurt spouse quickly changed her last statement “ I was wrong about the last part, you are not a woman either. You are not man enough to be a man. No man would be caught in a skirt that short and a halter top whiched showed so much skin. No man would look as good as you did in it. Lastly no man would strut in that outfit like they own it. Yeah, I watch you for a moment before I screamed at you

Look at yourself, you are no woman. You did not shave your legs or thin your eyebrows. Plus no woman would wear such a provocative outfit to just lounge around at home.”

Eric just stood there ashamed and mad at himself. He was ashamed for now the person who made him a better person knew his secret. The part of him which he kept secluded and was quite happy to do so. The fact his desire to dress was growing did not matter to him; he knew it was wrong, so he had to limit it. He knew it made him less of a person.

He was mad at himself, for he hurt his wife. He knew it should not had hurt her, that fact did not matter. What was important was the pain his dressing caused. The remorseful crossdresser had a strong desire to do almost anything to make her feel better. The one thing he knew he would not do was make a promise that he would never dress again. He would not lie to his wife. He knew that he would want to not dress but it urge would become a desire which could only be relieved by doing what was instinctive to him. Wear the clothes which made him happy.

Donna was mad at her reaction and also not seeing it. She knew that there was no logical reason for her to be so mad about her husband being dressed a transvestite. She did not had to be scared of her husband wanting another man, for he was straight. At least she thought he was, she then knew that would not matter for he was loyal and faithful.

She was happy with him and their relationship, until this moment she thought she had it all. She did not, she did not have a man who only wanted to dress as a man. It was amazing to her how something taken for granted can be such a deal breaker in a relationship.

Donna also kicked herself for not seeing this. Eric was just too perfect. He was the type of man who could install a new oven and then cook a fine gourmet meal on it. He was just as comfortable kicking it with the guy telling blue jokes as he was with a group of women talking about how to strengthen a relationship. He was just too good to be true.

As Donna was plotting her next course of action, Eric quickly went to the bathroom to change. He did not want his wife to have to see him dressed as Shelly for another second. In fact, he did not want his wife to ever see it again or bring up the subject. He saw the pain his guilty pleasure caused her. No amount of pleasure and fulfillment was worth giving someone else the pain he saw on his wounded wife’s face.

Eric came out of the bathroom and casually went into the living room. The sting operator was just going to act like the incident never occurred. His wife was smart, so maybe she would follow his lead. They both knew couples which had secrets out in the open which did not adversely affect the relationship. This one was not as bad as any of those. Eric lovingly said “Welcome home Buttercup. I am a little surprised to see you home early. Is everything alright.?”

Eric acting all nonchalant made Donna feebleminded for a moment. Donna thought to herself“How could he try to get out of this by not responding to how I feel?”, Then the reason came to her, he wanted to sweep it under the rug.

She was fine with that, afterall she had time to cool down. So what, he liked to wear skirts; he was a great man. She believed that she could live with that little negative for it his positives outweighed it. The willing mark said “Thanks for the great welcome home Westley . I should had called. I just could not stand the thought of going out to the bars for another late night with the girls. I wanted to come home to my man.”

Their pet names came from a movie, The Princess Bride. It was both of their favorite movie, when they went to costume parties Eric would always dressed as Dread Pirate Roberts and Donna as Buttercup. Donna loved it when Eric would say “as you wish” when he went off to do a favor she asked him to do. A while after catching her husband dressed, Donna started to think that maybe he wanted to dress as Buttercup. Donna thought that was not right, this relationship only had room for one Buttercup.

She then remember how a friend joked that they should switch costumes and she swore Eric was too eager with saying yes. He actually said no, he did not want any hints about about his dressing to be out in the open. This fact not matter for now to Donna, perception was more important than reality and her husband was not a man in her eyes anymore.

Those doubts would come later, now Donna was going along with the ruse. Her acceptance of Eric’s lie made the tension in the room go under the rug along with what she saw. They both eased into the charade of life changing event did not transpire a few moment ago.

Chapter 3

Even with wanting the marriage to go back to how it was before Donna lost her man, it could not be. The first couple of months nothing seemed ajar to the casual observer, but the dirt under the rug was growing. Eric thought of being caught by his wife everyday and was even sweeter than his normal self. Donna knew all those actions were just her husband being himself making up for hurting her. That irked her. Those extra acts of kindness reminded her of her man dressed as a lady ready to hit the town.

Donna could not allowed him to ever dress again. At this point she was not going to bring up his dirty hobby. She was just not going to give him time. She made honey do list for him if she left the house for a prolong period of time. She also would made it a habit to come home before the time she told him.

Then one day Donna could not take thinking of it anymore, she needed to rid herself of that vision of her husband not being a man. She came up with the idea of having him dress and then humiliate him so much, he would never want to put a skirt or dress on again.

The couple was sitting on the couch watching television when Donna said “Dress for me.”

Even with knowing what his wife was alluding to, Eric acted clueless and ask what.

Donna said “Come on dress for me. I want to see you dressed again Westley.”

Eric seeing a way out of this sticky situation said “Oh you want to be with The Dread Pirate Roberts tonight. As you wish.”

Donna did not want to but she started the humiliation of her husband so he got the point. “No I want to be with a Buttercup. Dress in something you would wear if I am not at home, you know like on May 5th 2012.”

Eric’s stomach dropped, right then he knew that his wife was not over seeing him dressed. He got up and with a strain in his voice said “As you wish.”

Eric went up to his renounced wardrobe, he was doing so good at fighting the urge to put on something which felt right. He felt it was not fair that he was about to hate something which he should enjoy. As he looked Eric decided to go with a maxi dress with flats. His wife said she wanted Buttercup so he was going to give it to her.

Eric was going to get some joy of this predicament he was in. He swirled around in the dress and watch how it flowed around. He savored seeing the fabric circle around him. He felt free and happy. The spring in his step as he walked down the stairs made it impossible to hide the delight he was having in that dress.

Donna did not like how much life she saw in her husband’s movements. She wanted to crush his pleasure in wearing women’s clothes and it was not working. She was going to remedy this with some light verbal humiliation. “While I see Erica is so enjoying herself right now.”

That verbal slap did lessen the good time Eric was having. “Come on Buttercup, you asked for this so don’t put me down.”

Donna did not want any fight out of her husband. She wanted him defeated so she quickly replied “Erica, if you are in a dress then I am going to call you by a woman’s name. Right now you are not a man, you are a woman.”

Eric knew his wife had a point and wanted her to get this nastiness out of her system. He could not blame her for having such bile at him. Those two ignore his dressing and they should have talked about it. He went to meet his wife halfway. “Then please call me Shelly, not Erica. When I am dressed my name is Shelly.”

Donna saw that her husband still had some fight in him. She was not going to give an inch. Her not giving any quarter had the added reward of adding to the humiliation. She was going to pick his name and he would be powerless to do anything about it. “No you are an Erica. It is fitting for you try to hide who you are by going with Eric when masquerading as a man, so me giving you the pet name of Erica would make your name, Eric, a constant reminder you are not a man, you are a woman.”

Those words struck Eric’s soul, he knew his wife was right. He was not a man, how could he expect his wife to see him that way. He liked to wear dresses. It was not to be sexy, or cute. It was for they just felt so right on him. He felt so comfortable right now in that maxi dress. Eric relented and said “You can call me Erica, but my name is Shelly.”

Donna got a sad satisfaction out of hearing the fight out of her husband. She knew she wanted it but it felt like a hollow victory. She had a funny feeling that somehow this win was going to end up as a defeat for her. Donna got tremendously remorseful and said “Dear, I am sorry. I just had to make sure you never wore a dress again. I had to make sure you knew how you should feel while wearing one. I love you and wish that I didn’t had to do this. I just don’t want my husband wearing a dress.”

Eric knew his wife was regretful of her actions, that knowledge did not change how he felt now. He felt less than human. He felt like he deserved being treated in such a bad manner by someone he loved. He needed to be punish for how his desires hurt his wife. He made a mistake when he said “No need to be sorry, I deserved that. I should have never went behind your back and indulged in my nasty vice. You don’t want your husband in a dress so as you wish.”

After saying those words, Eric went upstairs to dress. With Eric absolving her without accepting her apology Donna felt vindicated in humiliating him. She felt that she did nothing wrong.

Chapter 4

Donna making her husband feel bad about dressing did help her get over him not being a man in her eyes for a while. That feeling of betrayal she had from seeing him dressed as Shelly came back stronger, along with her not seeing Eric as a real man. A real man would not had put on a dress for his wife, even if he wanted to. He acted more like someone who should be in a dress and she hated it. She wanted her husband to be a sensitive stud; like Eric was, only without liking to wear a dress part.

Donna figured that she went about the humiliation all wrong. She let her husband pick the outfit he wore. He should have been wearing that night out on the town outfit instead. This time he would be in it and also he was going to use nair on his body. He was going to look more like a woman. Oh yes, she knew this would be the last time he would even want to be cute or sexy.

Donna came home from shopping and Eric helped her with bringing the bags into the house. She came in with the last bag and handed it to her husband. With a smirk on her face she said “I got something special for Erica.”

Those words stopped Eric in his tracks. He did not like seeing this vindictive side of his wife. Eric forcefully said “Don’t call me that!”

Seeing that resistance did not please Donna at all. The errant wife believed she was doing this for her husband own good. Eric needed to get rid of any inkling he had to dress. When she saw how disgusted he was wearing that outfit Donna knew she would see him as a man again. “I only call you that for it is a fitting name for someone who likes to wear sexy outfits. Now use that Nair I got you and get in that outfit you wore on May 5th of this year.”

Eric accepted he deserved this treatment from his wife, his lovely wife had to see him dressed all provocatively. She had to put up with her husband not being a man. All in all she was taking it well. He decided he would appease her and said “As you wish.”

Eric read the directions and used the Nair. He enjoyed the slight tingle and burning sensation it gave his skin. His heart started to race some as the guilty pleasure seeker used a washcloth to wipe the hair off of his body. The blissful man was so happy feeling how smooth his skin was. It felt so right. Erik question why he never done this before. He hated the name Erica, but would put up with being called it today just for he was so high from feeling that his body was how it was supposed to be.

As Eric put on the outfit, he knew he was not himself anymore. She was her realself. She was Shelly. That realization scared and strengthen her. Shelly was scared for she knew it was going to be so much harder to fight the urges to dress. The newly forged ady was strong for she was becoming who she was supposed to be.

Shelly proudly walked into the living room to see her wife with a look of disgust on her face. Donna could not believe that how satisfied and content her husband looked in an outfit which have made any other man feel so self conscious.. He should be ashamed to be in a dress. She was going to make him regret feeling good right now.

Donna said “Oh you like how you look Erica.”

Hearing that name did ruin the perfect moment for Shelly. “Yes, I do. Please call me Shelly, that is my name.”

Donna did not want to go through the name debate again so she laid down the rules. “Here is how it is Erica. I will call you Erica if I like and when I like. You do not deserve to be called Shelly. You need to be reminded what you really are. You are not a man, you are a woman.”

Those words wounded Shelly. She came back to reality. Shelly should be a man, but sadly she was not one. Also, no matter how hard she tried she would never be a true woman. She was less than either, she was less than human. She deserved the treatment she was receiving from her wife.

Feeling all that newly found confidence leave Shelly meekly agreed.

Donna liked seeing the moxy leave her husband. This was going to be so easy. Now it was time to make her feel bad about looking so good. Donna asked “Tell the truth Erica, you liked looking this pretty for men. You want men to want you. It is fine I want men to want me.”

Shelly never really thought of that before. She was more concern about just being as pretty as she could be. She did some soul searching and answered. “I want people to want me.”

Donna did not like the answer. She would not have liked any answer. If Shelly said no she would have not liked her solution to make her husband lose his desire to crossdress was not working. If Shelly said yes Donna would have hated that her husband wanted men to want him. Her honest husband saying both sexes made Donna think he was not admitting he liked men.

Donna with disapproval said. “I did not ask if you wanted women to want you. I asked if you wanted men to want you. Answer my question.”

Shelly begrudgingly said “Yes.”

Donna hated hearing the answer she wanted. This should feel so good right now. Shelly admitting this should cure her husband of wanting to dress. No man would want another man to see him as a sexy woman. She wanted to reinforce the repulsion she believed her husband was feeling so Donna force her husband to say he wanted men to find him sexy,

Those words were so painful and freeing to Shelly. It was painful that she had to leave l out women. She knew that she liked women so much more than men and saying men only felt like a lie. It was so freeing for she now admitted to herself a side which she did not know.

After hearing the forced confession, Donna was satisfied she cured her husband of his dark desired. Even with getting what she wanted, Donna felt bad. Deep down she knew she painted a story which was not real just to end a behavior which did not harm anyone. Donna, wanting to make right the damage she did to her husband, said “ Dear it is fine to want people to find you sexy. You just need to do it as the man you are. Now go change and we can put this all behind us.”

Shelly said “As you wish.”

The beaten woman went upstairs knowing full well this was not over. Her having to confess what she has been denying would never go back down into the subterranean level of her psyche. As she changed and went back to being Eric, Shelly wondered how she would deal with having better understanding of the woman she was.

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