The Daily Dormouse. (aka Bike, est. 2007) Part 3141 by Angharad Copyright© 2017 Angharad

---

This is a work of fiction any mention of real people, places or institutions is purely coincidental and does not imply that they are as suggested in the story.
*****

The afternoon was tedium in excelsis as I tried to remain interested in the case the student was putting for their defence. My colleague was prosecuting and I was there as sentencing judge with my black cap in my bag. All I wanted to do was to leave this place of misery and go and play with colours and fabrics and my plan of the girls’ flat. It had to be more fun than this.

I interrupted the proceedings: “I’m sorry but nothing you’ve said leads me to believe that any of the work in question is yours, Mr Wilson.” I addressed the unfortunate undergraduate. “In fact, it appears you have three assignments which appear to have been copied directly from pieces on the internet and one from an essay written by a previous student at this university.” I knew the essay, I’d marked it the first time it appeared.

“I have therefore, no option but to ask you to leave your course and this university. You have a right of appeal and we need to receive notice of that within one month from today. However, unless you have either some further evidence that your work is your own or that we haven’t adhered to the protocol concerning accusations of plagiarism, you could be wasting your money. You could also apply to a court of law to overturn my decision but that could cost you a great deal of money and could only decide on if we followed the law correctly. I think you’ll find we have.”

He threw his papers down on the table and shouted at me, “Fucking tranny bitch.”

I stopped and looked him straight in the eye. “I might be, but at least all my work is my own, unlike yours. Good day, Mr Wilson.” I left before he could utter anything at my riposte.

“That was a bit uncalled for,” said Mike Burton, my colleague from biology department, “you know...”

I shrugged. “It was the only thing he could say he thought could hurt me. He was not only wrong he showed his inability to say anything original, which demonstrates why he copied other people’s work—he’s not up to scratch and has been found out.”

“I hate doing these things,” he said putting the shoulder strap of his courier bag over his shoulder.

“You think I like them?”

“No, of course not.”

“My job is to facilitate a place where those who want to learn can do so from people who supposedly know a bit more about their subject. Sometimes I wonder.”

“I hope you’re not including me in that, Cathy.”

“Which bit?” I said and my smirk gave it away.

He frowned then smiled, “What he said.” He jerked his thumb back towards the room we’d used.

“Ah ah, that’s plagiarism, Mike.”

He blushed as red as any tomato and nodded. “Okay, I surrender to your superior mind.”

“My position is all that’s superior, I’m just quicker on my feet. Right,” I glanced at my watch, “I’m going to have a cuppa then collect my offspring from school.”

“Is that one of your girls who plays for England ladies?”

“Yes, we are so proud of her.”

“She is something special, isn’t she?”

“Very, she knows it but is very grounded about it all. She even wants to do her A-levels and go to uni because she realises a sports career is very short lived.”

“Good for her, what does she want to study?”

“She thinks she might want to teach.”

“Not the best occupation at present. I hear more and more part time posts are going zero hours contracts.”

“Not here they aren’t.”

“No I know that, but in places not too far away.”

“Once universities become just education businesses it all becomes pointless. If we care more about the money than the student, what is the point?”

“Without the money there is no point, no university, Cathy. We still need to be paid and the buildings need upkeep. The money has to come from somewhere.”

“As I spend half my life trying to locate new sources of income so we don’t have to raise teaching fees, I suspect I appreciate that even more than you do, Mike. At times I feel like a fund raiser cum mendicant, going round with my little begging bowl.”

“How much did you raise?”

“Last week, about half a million. They need a new spectrometer.”

“Well done.”

“Sod the tea, I’m going home, byeee.” I waved to him and called by my office handed the forms to Diane who checked them over.

“Do these today?”

“Please, recorded delivery.”

“You look tired.”

“I always am after I’ve ended someone’s career before it started.”

She glanced through the forms, “Looks pretty open and shut to me.”

“I’ll bet his parents won’t think so. I just hope they don’t decide to test it in a law court, then it gets messy and personal; not to mention expensive.”

“Do they ever appeal?”

“A few do, most are usually quite pleased we’ve rumbled them and they can stop the pretence of studying, because they that’s all they’re usually doing, pretending.”

“But why? Don’t they realise what they’re doing?”

“I don’t think they do a lot of the time. It’s often the first time away from home where they have freedom to do whatever they want. Providing it doesn’t affect their studies, I really don’t care. They’re supposed to be autonomous adults...” I paused because she nearly fell of her seat laughing. She’ll have to go.

“You coming to watch us play tomorrow?” asked Trish.

“What time is it?”

“Ten o’clock, isn’t it Danielle?”

“Usually.”

“I shall certainly try.” I said thinking I have better things to do than watch soccer matches I’ll have to see if any of the others wish to come. Having such a large family, we create our own cheer club.

Knowing Trish was also playing always makes me concerned because she is so much younger than some of the opposition players and consequently quite a bit smaller. But like Danni, she is selected on merit and is also a useful footballer if not quite as good as our resident international. However, I fear for both of them as some of the opposition players seem so big these days. Still, I can’t wrap them up in cotton wool however much I’d like to, they have to learn how to take care of themselves as much as possible because we live in a very predatory world and those with no skills of recognition of risk or how to deal with it, could find short and hazardous.

We all decanted from the VW and strolling back to the house Danielle said, “You don’t have to come, if you don’t want to. I realise how precious your time is.”

“I shall be there because I want to be and I want to be there because my girls are playing.”

“Oh, Sister Maria asked if you got the note.”

Damn, she’ll be there tomorrow—I’d better check my diary—what was it she wanted? Oh yeah, an address to the school leavers. Why me? Let’s get a cuppa before I expire from lack thereof.