Alexa B-Side: #6 - Charlotte's Dilema

Charlotte transferred the wet towels from the washer to the dryer. “What a wonderful Christmas present” she thought, and then kicked the new machine. What was he thinking? He is such an asshole! Leave it to a Neanderthal like Dick to think a washer and dryer were a good Christmas gift. These were the kind of things you went out on Saturdays and bought. But we could never do that she thought. Couldn’t interfere with the killing of defenseless animals!

But as Charlotte sat back down at the kitchen table with her cup of coffee, she knew it wasn’t the impersonal Christmas gift that had her in this mood. It was Alex. What was happening with him? How could he be walking around in a dress? Did Katie and Jenny put him up to this or did he choose to wear women’s clothes? She always wondered about him and spent the last few days thinking about it. Were there signs she didn’t pick up on? He had always been different than his brothers, but she just assumed it was because he was the youngest. But thinking back to Alex’s childhood, he was different than other youngest sons that she had known. So many of them tried to emulate their older brothers. They would try and dress like them and enjoy the same things as them. Unfortunately, at times it was for the worse, look at Dick and Bob. Bob was as big a chauvinistic pig as his older brother. But Alex had never been like that. He had always been kind of loner. He enjoyed reading and playing those stupid video games. He never wanted to hunt or fish like his older brothers. She had always written off as that his brothers and fathers were so mean to him, he had rejected those things.

But it was something else that ate at Charlotte. How could he do this to her? Had he rejected all that she had taught him and that the church had taught him? While Dick’s actions were reprehensible, Alex’s were almost as bad. She still loved her son but why did he have to act out like this. To dress as a woman was sickening to her. Men were men and women were woman. Any time she saw Bruce Jenner on TV, yes she still thought of him as Bruce, she would turn the channel. Her mind could not accept that someone would go to these extremes. And that her son would do this was a rejection of her and her feelings. She wanted to reach out to him as he hurt but something held her back. Yes, she had allowed her love of her son to get to her and she sent him that message on Christmas. She had allowed the motherly feelings to take control of her but she was still mad. She wanted to take her son over her knee and spank him like she had when he was a child.

She was also mad at how others would perceive her for having a crossdressing son. Did he even think of the shame that his actions would bring to this family! She could visualize the ridicule she would receive from people at school and in town when the world spread about her son. She might even lose her job because of this. The church’s views were clear on this issue. It did strike her as funny thought that as the church railed against homosexuality, it had priests running around playing around with little boys. But still with all that, the church could order the school to let her go because of this. She could see it now, unemployed 58-year-old woman being laughed at in the streets because her son was a freak. It was almost too much to bear.

Alexa's mother begins to deal with the aftermath of her husband's actions towards Alexa

But for all her anger there was one thing she kept coming back to was that she still loved her son. Dick had forbid her from talking to him, so she would have to find a way to reach out and find out what was going on. She would have to work under the cloak of darkness. She chuckled to herself that it was like being a spy. But it wasn’t too far from the truth. She was going against her husband and that was not the way she was raised. She had been raised to believe in the words of Ephesians “Wives should be subordinate to their husbands as to the Lord” and that was how she had always lived. But the husband was wrong in this case. For all his faults, she loved her husband. Or did she? As she thought about it, he was kind of an asshole. The washer and dryer for Christmas were a symbol of that. He had done things his way always and she was forced to accept it. Hunting and fishing on the weekends, Monday night football at Willy’s, bowling on Wednesday’s. And she was just supposed to sit there and take it. The longer she sat and dwelled on those things the madder she got at him. And while he had never truly accepted Alex he had become more verbal about it and now to outright kick him out of the family! She starred down at the wedding band she wore. It had started to feel like a symbol of slavery not of love.

It was at that point she made a decision. She would learn about crossdressing and see if she could find a way to accept Alex. She was going to go behind Dick’s back and try and keep in contact with Alex. She would still act as the dutiful wife, but things were about to change. She giggled as she thought about this. She felt like a naughty school girl, rebelling against everything she was ever taught. She would bide her time as she tried to find a way to bringing back her son. Feeling a rush of confidence, she went to the phone on the wall and placed a call. “Shelia, this is Charlotte Quinn. Do you think you could fit me in latter today? I think it’s time for a new style”



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This story is 1058 words long.