The Palm Reader

“Being friends with Laura Towers was and still is an adventure.

Take the summer after our grade eleven year, for example ...”

****

Then ...

“Come on, Tom. I wanna go to the fair!”

“What about James Parker, he’s your boyfriend.”

“He’s working, and I wanna go, please?”

****

“Hey, look! That tent, it says, ‘Psychic and Palm reader - free readings’!”

“It’s a scam, Laura”

“How can it be a scam when it’s free?”

“Fine ...”

“Come in, children.”

“You can tell the future? Do my friend Tom first.”

“No, you go first, Laura.”

“Fine. Here is my hand.”

“Mmm .. very interesting. You will be faced with a difficult choice. The choice to help a friend, even though you do not understand, or to walk away from them, and live with regret the rest of your life.”

“Whoa .. Come on, Tom. your turn.”

“Your future hangs in the balance. You can find the courage to take off your mask, or you can continue to hide. If you reveal your true self, your road will be hard, but you will be rewarded at the end. If you choose to hide, your life will be unhappy ... and short.”

“Let’s get out of here, Laura.”

“That was pretty freaky, huh, Tom? ... Tom, are you okay?”

“She was right. I ... cant explain how she could possibly know, but she was right about me.”

“What do you mean, Tom?”

“If I tell you, will you promise not to tell anybody else?”

“Of course. I promise.”

“I ... well, let me start by telling you a story. When I was about four, I found my mom’s wedding pictures. I thought she looked so beautiful, and I hoped that when I grew up I’d be as pretty as her on my wedding day.”

“What?”

“Let me finish. I watched some show that had a wedding, so I started practicing my walk down the aisle. I’d sing ‘here comes the bride” as I slowly walked, pretending there was a long train behind me.”

“You imagined yourself as the bride?”

“Uh huh. I was so sure of that part. I’d be the bride in my pretty wedding dress. Somehow it never even occurred to me to think of myself as the groom.”

“But it was just pretend ..”

“Maybe that was, but things got worse. When I went into grade one, they separated us by gender for recess, and I couldn’t understand why I wasn’t with the girls.”

“You mean you wished you were a girl?”

“No, I mean I saw myself as a girl, somehow forced to pretend to be a boy.”

“I ... really dont know what to say. But I cant help but think about what she said to me, about helping a friend. I guess that’s you, and I really dont want to regret not helping you for the rest of my life. So what do you plan to do?”

“I ... I don’t know. I never planned on telling anybody. I didn’t want to be a freak. But lately I’ve been feeling like trying to hide is eating at my soul like acid. I ... don’t know what to do.”

“I don’t know either. But I’ll stay your friend, no matter what.”

“Thanks.”

We separated, I went home, and for a couple of days, nothing really changed.

Then Laura came over to my house.

“I had an idea about your ... situation.”

“Okay, I’m listening.”

“Come over to my house, I ... have some clothes you could try.”

“I .. I’d look silly.”

“Maybe, maybe not. Can’t know until you try. And nobody will see you but me, unless you decide they can.”

“Okay, let’s give this a try.”

So we went over to her house, and soon I was wearing girl’s clothes for the first time.

“Be honest. What do you think?” I asked.

“Oh ... wow .... wow ... oh ...”

“That bad?” I said, wanting to cry.

“That good. You look better than me.”

“No way.”

“Well, maybe not, but you look really good, hon. No reason why you couldn’t go out like that and be accepted as a girl.”

I looked in the mirror, and I had to agree. Nobody would think anything was off about me if I went out like this. But passing was only part of the battle I’d have ahead of me, and so I said, “Well, that’s good to know, but there is other things to worry about. Like my folks, like whether I would be able to go to school as a girl, and much more besides.”

“One step at a time. Go out as a girl somewhere you wouldn’t be well known, and get a feel for how it feels. Then if its what you want, I’ll stand by you when you talk to your folks, and do anything I can so you can come to school as a girl if you want to.”

“You sure? It probably wont be all as easy as dressing up has turned out to be.”

“You remember what that lady at the fair said. There’s no way I’m gonna wonder for the rest of my life if I should have stepped up. “

***

Now ...

And as the lady at the fair predicted, the next while was filled with struggles, with some failures as well as some success, but here I am, my true self, and being the maid of honor at Laura’s wedding.

And here is my toast to the best friend I could have asked for, and the most beautiful bride in the country ... Laura Towers-Parker!”

“To the Bride!”

End.