Reversals - Ch07

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CHAPTER SEVEN
Sisterly Advice

Eric toiled in the kitchen, scrubbing the bottom of the kitchen sink for the second time that day to remove some gunk he'd missed earlier. Rinsing and drying followed. The sink needed to shine for Julia's inspection when she returned home from work. Perfection would be demanded.

It had been three days since Julia had declared that they were now in a female lead marriage. Everyday since had been a challenge in humility and service for Eric. As the homemaker, there was housework that Julia expected him to complete each day which she inspected in the evenings and often added to.

The inspections were painful and demeaning. As she combed through the apartment there was the inevitable frown of disappointment that told him he had failed on something. Often the frown was accompanied by hurtful comments and instructions on how to improve or 'do it right'.

Yesterday, she'd gotten so upset with him for a grease stain in the sink, from some sausages he'd cooked for breakfast, that she'd actually taken away the power cord from his computer as a punishment. He missed another important engagement with his guild and lied using the same half-truth about 'computer problems' he'd relied on before to cover his shame. What else could he do? Tell people that Julia unplugged him for failing to clean the sink to her satisfaction? It was unthinkable.

Eric furrowed his brow in frustration. The threat of cutting him off financially and in the bedroom was daunting, plenty to blackmail him with. That she used it so freely seemed cruel. But, there was something else developing that was even more worrisome. He wasn't sure what it was. A certain attitude from her? A bolder confidence? Maybe the way she carried or comported herself? Whatever it was, it seemed to be effecting him, making him more... compliant to her. It was like she simply expected that he recognize her authority over him and he was. He felt it anytime he was with her now and it seemed to be getting worse, more intense. If it continued...

He shook his head and took a deep breath trying to clear his mind of troubling thoughts. It was well into the afternoon, time to focus. He needed to finish his cleaning before Julia came home. He stepped back from the sink, gave the kitchen a final look, and decided to move on. Another, even more degrading, task was waiting.

Walking into the bathroom, Eric stared at the washbasin with ambivalence, shaking his head at the task before him. A dozen of Julia's panties were soaking in the basin waiting for him to clean them. He felt humiliated at the prospect.

He'd dug them out of her hamper earlier, feeling odd and a bit perverse the entire time. Now they were waiting for him to hand scrub them as Julia had directed. Eric grimaced with disgust. What type of man would agree to hand scrub his wife's panties? What did that make him?

He fought back his feelings, there was a job to do. Julia expected her panties to be cleaned and she expected him to clean them.

Leaning over the basin, he stared at the sudsy water and wet, delicate panties. He had to admit, they were tantalizing in a way. He couldn't help but think of Julia's lovely, sweet womanhood looking at them.

He reached a hand out then stopped, hovering just inches over the soaking panties. He was struggling inside. Would doing this change him somehow? Was he about to pass some unspoken line into a lower level of servitude? He shook his head as he lowered his fingers ever closer towards Julia's intimates. Like it or not, Julia had told him to do it. Refusing her wasn't really an option. Slowly, his face twisted into a partial grimace, he dropped his hand into the water, pulled a pair out, and stared at them while water and suds drizzled away back into the basin. He felt a pleasing twitch in his pants suddenly. The panty was exotic, sexy, utterly female. Tiny, bikini panties, black lace with a decorative, red bow on the front. Thinking about Julia wearing them, hour upon hour, against her naked pussy was making him stiff.
Eric groaned in frustration. He had to remind himself that there was a job to do. Julia would expect to see clean and dry panties in a handful of hours.

Eric lowered them back to the water and began to slowly, gently, rub at the crotch of the garment with his fingers. He continued cleaning, rubbing and scrubbing at every inch, taking his time, continuing until he believed Julia would be pleased. It felt wrong to be doing it, shameful, but some small part of him was confusingly enjoying it too, almost pleased that Julia was making him do it for some perverse reason.

After the first panty, he did the rest in turn. He rinsed them afterwards, gently squeezed the water out, and pressed them between some fluffy white towels to further dry them. Finally, they were hung from little hooks with clothespins on the ends designed for air drying such things. When he was done, a dozen panties were adorning their shower.

Eric felt somehow diminished at the end of it. It was like another piece of his manhood had been taken. Maybe that was part of Julia's plan, to drain away his manhood bit by bit. If it continued what would be left?

He became increasingly distressed as he pondered his future in Julia's female lead marriage, staring at her sexy panties like they were indictments, each one proclaiming the demise of his masculinity. The fact that he was rock-hard after being forced to hand wash her dirty panties just made it all worse. Did she know how excited it would make him? How could he permit this to continue?

He wandered out of the bathroom in a conflicted fog of loss and arousal. Where Julia was taking them just had to be wrong, didn't it? Eric crossed over to the couch and plopped down.

Julia had become like a force of nature. Escaping his predicament and returning their marriage to something more normal seemed impossible. Getting a job would help for certain, it might be part of the answer but it didn't seem likely that Julia would surrender their female lead marriage that easily.

He sat there stewing for a time when it finally occurred to him that he needed to somehow talk to somebody about the situation. He desperately needed some perspective, some advice. But who to go to?

Lucas just wouldn't understand what was happening, not on any level. It would be mortifying to tell him the things that Julia had done to him. To tell any of the guys he knew that his wife had literally taken control over everything, had turned him into a homemaker and was now making him hand wash her soiled panties was beyond humiliating. There was just no way to tell that to other guys. He'd be declared a wimp or sissy or maybe worse. He'd lose every friend he had.

Then, as he sat there almost ready to abandon hope that he might find someone to commiserate with he unexpectedly thought of his sister. Emily wouldn't be his first choice as a confidant, they weren't really close. She did care about family though and he thought he could trust her.

He wavered for a bit, then before he could convince himself not to, he grabbed his phone, looked her up in his family contacts, and hit the call button. It began to ring. His anxiety immediately spiked. He was having second thoughts. How could he even consider discussing his plight with his sister? He decided to hang up...

"Hello?" Emily said.

"Em?" Eric replied hesitantly.

"Eric? That you?" Emily asked.

He thought about just hanging up, maybe pretend it was a mistake, an accidental dialing or something.

"Eric? Something wrong?" she asked.

"Yeah," he replied, the uncertainty clear in his voice.

"What's going on? Did something happen? Is everybody okay?" she asked.

Eric felt a flood of emotion rising. He caught his breath as his eyes began to moisten. "No. Not really," he choked out, struggling to regain composure.

"Eric, what's going on?" she demanded firmly.

"I'm... having problems," he said slowly, "at home."

"Eric, what are you talking about? At home? What do you mean? Julia? You having problems with Julia?"

Eric nodded vigorously, realizing a moment later the pointlessness of the gesture over the phone. "Yes," he said, hoping there was no need to explain further.

Emily sighed, exasperated. "What happened? What she do?" she asked impatiently.

Eric cringed, pulling the phone tightly to his head. "It's... just going all wrong, Em," he whined. How could he tell her, without really telling her, he wondered. "She's like taking over our whole marriage." He wanted to spill every detail, wanted to hear soothing, supporting words from his sister; but, the shame was too deep, too hurtful. "She controls all our money, Em. I don't know what to do. She's threatening to cut me off if I don't do everything she wants."

"What?! Eric..." she started. "Get a job! Man up, little brother," she said, sounding annoyed.

Eric closed his eyes and shook his head slowly, his sister's words adding to his pain, confirming his failures. "I've been trying. It's been very difficult," he said, almost groaning the words out. "The job market isn't what it used to be," he added.

The line was quiet.

"You don't understand, Em. This is a lot more than just getting a job. She... took over. Everything. She's forcing me to do things," he said with desperation. "It's like she expects me to become her servant or maid or something, Em."

The line was quiet.

"Em? She says we're in a female lead marriage now!" he blurted, his cheeks burning at the admission.

Emily snorted, then muffled her phone for a few moments. "Did I hear that right?" she asked when she came back. "A female lead marriage?"

Eric felt almost dizzy with humiliation and embarrassment - it was out there. His sister knew how pathetic he'd become. What was he thinking?! "Em, please," he begged. "Please don't... This is... it's serious. I don't know what to do. I don't know... how to handle her anymore."

Emily sighed.

He felt utterly humiliated, devastated, worse than before he called. There was more though, something twisted, because as desperate as he was for a way out, as much as Julia had to be stopped, some small part of him was still aroused by Julia's, new found, dominance. Even, the fact, that his sister now knew about the FLM was somehow adding to it. It was like humiliation and sexual arousal were getting fused together in his brain. What was happening to him? It just had to be stopped before he lost himself. "I was hoping maybe you could help me figure out what to do," he said meekly.

"Good grief, Eric. Really? A female lead marriage? Huh. Didn't expect that one," she mused. "I'm not really surprised you're having problems with Julia," she said. "I mean, I expected she'd have you wrapped around her pretty little finger by now but I didn't think she'd have your balls in a jar," she mocked.

Eric winced at the critique.

"How long have you two been married for now?" she asked.

"A little over three years," he said.

"Three years? Honestly, I didn't expect you guys to make even two. Not you and Julia," she said.

"What? Why?"

"You know, I did try having this conversation with you before you married her. Remember?"

Eric thought back to their wedding. A few people, including his sister, had approached him about Julia. He didn't take any of them seriously, he was too enamored with his bride, felt too lucky, too thrilled that a woman as beautiful and sexy as Julia agreed to marry him - a fairly average, nerdy guy. "I remember you asked me if I was sure, something like that."

"That's right. I asked you if you were really sure if you wanted to marry her. I asked you if you thought you really knew her," she said.

Eric shrugged. "I don't think I really thought about it. I was so thrilled to be getting Julia," he said. "I guess I figured you were just doing a big sister thing. I didn't take it like a warning or anything."

"I felt responsible at the time," she explained. "I introduced you two, more like dumped her on you if you want the truth. You weren't suppose to marry the girl!"

"Dumped her on me?" he asked with surprise.

Emily sighed. "Didn't you ever ask her about her past? Guys she dated? Anything like that? You two ever have that conversation?"

"No," Eric admitted. He'd never asked her, never wanted to know about her boyfriends. He figured there had been many, most of them probably better looking than he was, more appealing, even more capable in the bedroom.

"No?! Huh," she said surprised. "You should have, Eric," she said firmly. "Maybe you could have headed off your... situation. I dunno, maybe not. I still don't think you should have married her, little brother. For starters, you're just not her type."

"Not her type?" Eric asked, puzzled.

Emily sighed again. "That's what I said, not her type, Eric," she replied, seemingly frustrated. "Don't you get it? She used to date real beefcakes, big guys, lots of muscles, very masculine. I think she dated a lot of athletes, like guys on the football team, guys like that."

It made sense, depressing, but it made sense. Julia was an alpha female, she preferred alpha males.

"I'm afraid, little brother, that you were more of a...," she paused for a moment, looking for the right word, "compromise," she finally said. "I'm pretty sure, you just happened to come into her life at the right time. Like I said, you're just not her type. She never... This is going to sound harsh but I think you need to hear it. I don't think she ever, in her heart-of-hearts, wanted to be with you."

Eric went a bit numb, truly dumbfounded by his sister's words. "I don't understand," Eric said slowly.

"Eric, when she met you she was rebounding. She was running away from all the guys she'd been dating," she said. "As I heard it, she had terrible taste in men. She kept picking bad guys to be with. I mean, like really bad, slapped around bad. Get it? Men that would get drunk and get abusive. Got the picture?"
"But... if I wasn't her type and she was having problems with men then why start dating me?" he asked.

"Because she was confused and messed up at the time maybe," she replied. "I think... it's because you were a different kind of guy. You weren't going to abuse her like the men she normally dated so she convinced herself that you were the kind of man she should be with. She idealized you into something you weren't. That's what I think happened," Emily said.

The line went quiet for a time.

Eric was utterly perplexed. Was his entire marriage to Julia a sham? Did he really know her at all, understand her pain, her needs?

"Em?"

"Yes?"

"I have to ask," he started ,"if Julia was so messed up back then, why the heck did you introduce us?! Why?"

"I just asked you to get her a drink!" she snapped back. "You weren't supposed to marry her you little nerd! Don't blame me for your problems!"

Eric shook his head feeling betrayed. "My sister introduces me to a beautiful girl at a party, asks me to get her a drink, and disappears. What was I supposed to think? You didn't tell me anything about her, Em! Why not?"

The line was quiet.

"Em? Why didn't you warn me about Julia when you introduced us?"

"I was trying to get rid of her, Eric," she said matter-of-factly.

"What?"

Emily sighed. "Eric, I told you, she was messed up, confused. She was getting beat up by the horrible creeps she was dating. So she..." Emily sighed again. "She decided to experiment with other girls, okay?"

"Other girls?!" Eric asked astonished.

"She was chasing me, Eric! She was chasing me and I wasn't interested because I knew she was on the rebound," Emily said. "When I saw you at the party I dumped her on you. I told her you'd get her a drink, that I needed to talk to somebody first and I disappeared," she admitted. "I didn't expect her to take an interest in you. How could I? I thought she was only interested in girls at the time. How was I supposed to know she'd latch onto you?"

Eric was stunned at the revelations.

"And, before you ask," Emily started, "yes, I was experimenting back in college too. Julia was chasing me because she knew. But, we were never lovers. There was never even a date."

Eric didn't say anything. He was married to a woman he didn't even know anymore. It seemed like, she never knew him either. Then, when she finally saw his failings, when the facade crumbled, it just made sense to her to take over. It didn't make it right but it might explain why she was doing it to him.

"You were just supposed to get her a drink, Eric."

"But, what am I supposed to do now, Em?" he asked. "I can't just walk away from her. Even if I wanted to, I couldn't. I have nowhere to go. I have no money of my own anymore. Maybe I could get welfare or something but I don't think I'd even qualify for that."

"I don't know what to tell you. I'd probably have left a long time ago but that's me," she said.

The line was quiet.

"I haven't seen Julia in years," Emily said. "Seems to me she can be very driven when she wants, little brother. So, I'll give you some advice. If you don't want to leave her then you better learn how to deal with her being in charge," she said. "Get comfortable being a male in a female lead marriage, little brother."

"She said she's going to change me in ways I won't like," Eric said with melancholy.

"Then I'd leave, little brother. Not sure what else to say to you. I'd leave," she said simply.

Eric lifted the phone away from his ear and hung up on her. He felt betrayed by Emily, used by his own sister when she brought Julia into his life. Of course, she wasn't entirely to blame; but, had she not dumped Julia on him that night...

Eric got up from the couch and began wandering through the apartment as he struggled to keep his emotions under control.

His stomach began churning as he looked around their home, at the life they had built together. How real had it ever been? He couldn't help but wonder if Julia had ever truly loved him or if it was some fantasy version that she loved. Which was it?

He wasn't sure he could blame her either way, now that he understood her past. Maybe everything she was doing, from her point of view, made perfect sense. Eric winced at the thought of it, his mood darkened. Julia had been a victim. She wasn't being cruel so much as trying to keep from being a victim again because another man, in her life, was failing her. Was that it?

Eric grimaced and shook his head. It still didn't make it okay. Eric hadn't asked to be in a FLM, hadn't asked to be her maid either for that matter. She shouldn't be forcing it on him. He needed to stand up to her somehow. It seemed impossible though. She'd been very clear - they weren't going back to how things were and she was planning even more changes. Whatever she had in mind seemed ominous.

His stomach tied itself in knots as he dwelt on it. The situation was unbearable. He rubbed his forehead and groaned as his heart started to race and pound. There was only one option - escape. As unimaginable as it was, leaving Julia was the only thing to do.

It might be a terrible struggle but it had to be better than what Julia was doing. His face twisted up into a grimace of disgust as he fought self-doubt and worry. He couldn't allow himself to think about the consequences. It was too important to get away from her while he still could.

Eric marched to his closet in the bedroom, rummaged in the back, and pulled out his suitcase and travel bag. He tossed them on the bed and froze, curling his sweating hands into fists as he stood there. He pushed down the pain in his stomach with difficulty, lamenting the loss of his relationship with his beautiful, vibrant wife. He was desperate to stay with her but just had to go, had to find the strength.

Firming his resolve, Eric started packing the essentials. Anytime Julia came to mind, he refocused on the packing and on the idea of being true to himself, thinking back to the days when he had a great job and was in control of his life and destiny. He kept going, tearing through closet and drawers, leaving a mess as things were abandoned as unneeded. When finished, the luggage was filled to capacity, loaded with nearly everything needed for living on the road.

He was about to leave the room but stopped and walked to Julia's dresser instead. He slid open the top drawer, her lingerie drawer, and stared at all the lovely garments within. Silks and satins with lovely lace brocades littered the drawer. If nothing else, she was the most beautiful and sensuous woman he'd ever been with, he doubted he'd find anything like her again.

Gently, he pulled out a pair of red, silk panties with a rose-pattern brocade. They were beautiful and richly feminine. He stuffed them into his pocket as a memento, something to remember her by.

Then, in a sudden act of defiance, he yanked the drawer out entirely and flipped it onto the floor. Julia's bras, panties, and nighties were in a heap, a bit of retribution for making him hand scrub her dirty panties. He sneered at the mess with satisfaction then began kicking at the heap repeatedly, scattering it in all directions. Eric chuckled at the results. It was like a bomb had gone off. Panties, bras and nighties were everywhere, even the lamps were decorated.

"Now you get to do some cleaning," he mocked as if Julia was standing there.

Picking up the luggage, he left the room and dropped the suitcase and travel bag at the front door. All that remained was to leave. He had a couple of hours before Julia would return from work.

A smile spread across his face as he walked into their freshly cleaned kitchen. Eric grabbed a beer out of the refrigerator, opened it and began chugging it down. Gulp after gulp he relished the cold brew passing down his throat. In moments, it was gone.

"Screw her," he said contemptuously.

It was the same beer Julia had found days earlier at the front door, beer he'd been afraid to even touch until now. Eric grinned then belched as crudely as he could, celebrating his freedom from Julia.

Grabbing the rest of the six-pack, he walked to the sliding glass door for the patio and flung it open, slamming it to the back of the track. He stepped out onto the patio with a smile, plucking another beer out to enjoy.

John was below, sprawled out on his patio, looking up at him, likely drawn to the noise from the sliding glass door moments before. Unsteadily, he rose a large can of beer towards Eric, gesturing a toast, one beer drinker to another. Eric grinned and returned the gesture then slugged back some of the golden nectar. It didn't take long before he'd drained the bottle, fully enjoying the fresh air and sunshine.

Grabbing another bottle from the carton, he eased into the deck chair to relax and took another couple long slugs of brew. A pleasing buzz started to mellow his mood. It was a near perfect day to start his new life, he reasoned. He took a deep breath and eased it out slowly. He resolved to enjoy their apartment while he still could, maybe have a last meal, finish the beers, whatever else came to mind. No need to rush, maybe leave in a hour or so, plenty of time before 'her majesty' returned home. He took another large slug and smiled. He only wished he could see her face when she found the bedroom trashed.

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