If you look exactly like your sister, never say "yes" when she asks you for help...
“I’m sorry,” said Holly. “I must be getting old, but I could have sworn my little brother just said he has a date with a man?”
I frowned and looked at my sister as I said, “You make that sound so dirty. I said I have a date with George, not just some man.”
Smirking, my sister said, “For you sis, George is just some man. How did you manage to get a date with George?”
I shrugged and said, “I dunno. He broke my will. He’s very charming and he said I’m the most beautiful woman in town.”
Holly laughed and said, “I shouldn’t have left you alone! I had no idea you could be charmed by a used car salesman. I understand that to everyone, including me by the way, you’re a pretty girl. I know I tell you all the time you’re a girl and that you should consider yourself to be a girl even when you’re not dressed as one. But sheesh, Callie! Even you should know you can’t date a man! Especially George.”
I started to say something when a man, his wife and two little girls walked up and started looking at the cars. Holly was annoying me now. It’s not my fault I had a date. The man asked Holly for a brochure on all three cars on display. She smiled vacuously and gave the brochures to him.
When the family had left, I said, “What’s wrong with me dating? Especially George. He seems very nice.”
Holly just stood there and stared at me for almost thirty seconds. She said, “Seriously? I mean seriously? Girl, you can’t date men, period. You can’t even date the little dweebs you go to school with. You’re not a girl. You just play one on TV. I know how easy it is to let all this go to your head. But there’s no way you can date a man. Especially George. One, he’s a man. Two he’s a sleaze bag used car salesman! Three, he’s too old for you. Even if you were a genuine girl, you are only seventeen.”
My eyes went wide and I almost raised my voice. I said, “I’m not having sex with him! It’s just dinner and dancing for crying out loud!”
Frowning, Holly said, “Which usually leads to sex. Something tells me George isn’t interested in boinking a boy.”
Folding my arms and scowling, I said, “I’m not being boinked by anybody! George has reservations at a fancy restaurant and he didn’t want to go by himself. That’s all there is to it.”
Holly stepped up close to me and said, “You know what sis? I’m not going to demand you call off your date. Go ahead and go on the date. It’ll teach you a lesson!”
“It’s just a dinner and maybe dancing. How bad could it be?” I asked, frowning at my sister.
Holly rolled her eyes. She said, “He may be the perfect gentleman who just wants some company during dinner. His interest in you may be purely platonic. But keep your knees together.”
I was posing in front of the full length mirror, wearing Holly’s little black dress and three inch pumps, twisting left and right when Mom came into my room. I had a very short time after the car show closed down to get home and get ready. I have to admit that getting ready for a date was a bit exciting. I said, “What do you think, Mom? Does this dress make my ass look too big?”
Frowning, Mom said, “Your butt looks fine, Caleb. What’s this that Holly is telling me? You have a date? With a guy? An older guy?” She folded her arms and gave me a stern look.
I leaned into the mirror to double-check my make-up. I said, “What’s the big deal? It’s not a real date. He had a reservation at Ciccone’s that he didn’t want to just go to waste and he didn’t want to go by himself. He was really nice about it. I just see it as a free meal. I just don’t see what you and Holly have against me going.”
Still frowning, Mom said, “For starters you’re a boy.”
I shrugged and said, “Nobody’s perfect, Mom. Look. Holly is always telling me I need to be a girl. I need to think like a girl. I need to act like a girl. So when I do, you make a federal case out of it!”
Shaking her head as well as wagging her finger, Mom said, “Don’t drag me into this. I thought this was a bad idea from the get-go. I just never would have believed that you’d develop an interest in men.”
I rolled my eyes and with exasperation in my voice, I said, “I don’t have an interest in men! I did get caught up in the glamour of how I was dressed and the amount of attention I was getting. It wasn’t like I was trying to get a date or anything.”
Mom shook her head again and said, “Even Holly wasn’t this naïve about guys. I just don’t want you to get hurt. And I don’t like you fooling this guy.”
I said, “I’m fooling people every time I go out at Mel’s raceway wearing boots and a mini-dress.”
Mom laughed without humor and said, “That’s completely different! You’re not trying to date anyone. It’s like acting. You’re putting on a show. Going out to dinner is a bit more intimate.”
“I’ll be good,” I said with a smile. To be honest, I was starting to regret the whole thing. I got caught up into the moment and let it carry me away. The problem is that when I’m dressed as a boy, I’m ignored by everyone. But dressed as Callie, I was beyond popular. It was intoxicating.
Mom said, “I could put my foot down and put a stop to this. But you know what? I agree with Holly. Just go ahead and go.”
Mom started to turn away. She stopped and gave me the once over. She grinned and said, “You’re gorgeous, by the way.”
He was late. I sat on the couch looking nervously at the front door. Mom had managed to get Dad out of the house on some pretext, but I know they won’t stay away for long. I was a mixed bag of emotions. I was both excited about going on a date as Callie and bothered that I had probably just made a big mistake.
I let myself get carried away with all the attention and compliments I get as Callie. Guys and girls both smile and talk to me. As Caleb, I have a few pasty faced fellow loser friends and even they don’t want to do a lot of things with me. How can I resist someone telling me how beautiful and sexy and wonderful I am?
I jumped when the doorbell rang. I knew at that moment that Holly and Mom were right. This was stupid. But I was committed. I know I could open the door and then tell him to go to hell. I was sure Mel would frown on that since George is a big advertising customer. With a loud sigh, I got up and walked to the door.
When I opened it, there was George wearing a big grin. In his hand was a big bouquet of flowers. He said, “You look beautiful! Here. These are for you.” He handed me the flowers. I’ve never been given flowers before so I wasn’t sure how to react. I tried to remember how Holly acted.
I smiled and said, “Thank you, George! They’re gorgeous!” I sniffed them for a moment. “Let me put these in water. I’ll be right back.” No way in hell was I inviting him inside the house. I grabbed a tall glass from the cupboard, quickly filled it and stuffed the flower stems into the glass and set the glass on the kitchen counter.
My first flowers. I should probably take a picture. But I didn’t want to keep George cooling his heels on the front porch. I tried to hurry back to the door, but my movement was restricted by the tight skirt of the dress and my high heels. I was oddly turned on by this restriction.
I stepped out the door and shut it behind me. I said, “I’m ready.”
George leaned in and gave me a kiss on the cheek. He grinned and said, “You are very lovely tonight, Callie.” He took my hand and led me back to his car, a competition orange Lexus RC F sports car. Just riding in this car will make the date worth it.
Ever the gentleman, George opened the car door for me, held my hand as I tried to gracefully as possible maneuver into the passenger seat. Getting into a sports car wearing a short, tight dress and high heels and maintaining a feminine posture isn’t particularly easy. After I was seated, he closed the door for me. I wasn’t sure if he was being chivalrous, or he just didn’t want me touching the car much.
Moments later, we sped away from the curb. I ran my fingers along the dash board and said, “This is a really nice car! It must be expensive.”
George waved his hand dismissively and as he removed my hand from the dashboard, said, “No big deal. This is the car I just go get groceries in.” I smiled as I looked over at the odometer and noticed it only had fifteen miles on it. I had a feeling this car just rolled off the showroom floor for the express purpose of this date.
“So, Callie. How long have you been working for Mel?” asked George as we breezed through a red light.
Feeling a bit nervous, I said, “Just a few months. Holly talked me into trying it.”
As we zipped past a few cars going the speed limit, George smiled and said, “I’ll have to remember to thank Holly. You two together have helped bring interest and a bit of glamour back to local racing. I love those life-size cut outs of you in the automotive stores. When I asked the guy at the store if I could have your poster, he told me to get in line. You’re very popular it seems. It’s really wonderful to have you has my guest tonight for dinner.” George drifted the car around a tight corner through another red light.
Holding on to the arm rest, I said, “If we live.”
George just laughed. I guess I was supposed to be impressed by his reckless driving.
A few minutes later, we thankfully arrived at Ciccone’s, an expensive Italian restaurant. George hurried around the car to open my door and he held out his hand to assist me in exiting the vehicle. And trust me, I needed the help. Taking my hand again, he led me to the entrance to the restaurant and continued to hold my hand as we were directed to our table. The waiter pulled my chair out for me and then slid it under me as I sat down.
After the waiter left so we could look over the menus, George placed his hand on top of mine and said, “This is nice, isn’t it? It’s my favorite restaurant.”
I smiled at George and said, “It is very nice. I’ve never been here before.” I picked up the menu and started glancing over it. None of the items had prices. I guess if you were worried about cost, you’d eat somewhere else.
George turned his menu around and pointed at some objects on it. He said, “If you’re worried about your figure, you might try the pasta primavera. But I recommend the chicken parmigiana.”
I said, “I like lasagna.”
George grinned and said, “That’s good too.”
As we waited for the food to arrive, George talked about what he loved most; his car business. Oddly, he even talked about his ex-wives. They were apparently all beautiful and apparently all just interested in his money. “That’s what I like about you, Callie,” George said just as the waiter was bringing our dinner. “You’re real. You’re not just some gold digger.”
Looking at my plate, I said, “Wow. This looks good.”
George took a bite of his dinner, closed his eyes and moaned. He said, “Oh yes. This is wonderful. So, Callie. I’ve been doing all the talking. You know all about me now. What about you? Who is Callie Simmons?”
I poked another mouthful of Lasagna into my mouth before answering. After swallowing, I said, “What do you want to know?”
George shrugged and said, “Well…for starters, are you going to college or are you staying with a modeling career?”
I said, “I’d like to go to college, but I have to finish high school first!” I giggled. Seeing the expression on George’s face, maybe I should have said I was going to stick with modeling.
I said, “Yeah. I’ll be a senior next year. I turn eighteen next October.”
Looking like he’d been shot, George said, “You’re seventeen?”
Without looking up from stabbing my next bite, I said, “Yep.”
George was quiet for the next few minutes while we ate. I didn’t hear anything, but he pulled out his phone and glanced at it. He frowned and said, “I’m so sorry, Callie. But it seems something important has come up. I’m going to end our evening early. I sincerely apologize.”
I actually felt disappointment that I wasn’t going to get to go dancing. I said, “Was it something I said?”
Shaking his head and waving his hands a bit, George said, “Oh no. It’s not you. You’re perfect. Something I can’t help has come up. I hope you understand.”
“Of course,” I said, carefully wiping my mouth so I didn’t smear my lipstick.
Fifteen minutes later, George was helping me out of his car in front of my house. He shook my hand and said, “I had a lovely evening, Miss Simmons. I wish you continued success in your modeling.” He hesitated a moment. I could tell he wanted to kiss me. He shook my hand again and hurried back to his car. He sped off, leaving me standing alone on the sidewalk in front of my house.
“I’m glad you told him your age, Callie,” said my sister Holly. “Even a douche like George can’t afford to date under-aged girls. Not if he wants to keep his business anyway.” We were sitting on Holly’s bed. I had snuck through the living room after Holly distracted Dad. We were both in our nighties.
“And you were right,” I said holding up my hands. “It was really stupid of me. I just got carried away.”
Holly sat there a moment, her jaw set in thought as she scratched her chin in the same way Dad does when he’s thinking. She said, “You know. You need a boyfriend.”
Furrowing my brow, I said, “I can’t have a boyfriend! We just talked about how my date was a big mistake!”
Frowning, Holly said, “Not a real boyfriend. Just a beard. Get everyone to think you have a boyfriend so most guys will leave you alone. Hmmm. I wonder if Eric would do it.”
“Isn’t he something like twenty?” I asked. “Isn’t he still too old for me?”
“He wouldn’t actually date you or anything,” said Holly. “We’ll just tell everyone that you’re dating him. So then all the Georges in the world will leave you alone.”
“Think he’d do it? I mean, if he’s dating me, even if it’s pretend, he can’t date other girls. He might not care for that idea much,” I said.
Holly shrugged. She said, “I have no idea if he’d do it or not. I’m going to bring it up next weekend at the track.”
“Eric wouldn’t be a bad choice,” I said. “He knows who I am at least. I like him. He seems nice.”
Holly shook her head and gave me a funny look. She said, “It’s my fault you’re suddenly boy-crazy.”
I rolled my eyes and said, “Are you going to act this way for everyone I say I like? I like Eric as a friend. He seems like a nice person! I’m not attracted to him! Sheesh!”
Holly said, “I was starting to wonder. I’m worried I’ve created a monster or something.”
I looked at myself in Holly’s mirror and said, “At least I’m a pretty monster…”
Grinning his pimpled face, Izzy said as he chewed his hamburger, “Caleb, I can’t believe you missed the car show!”
I shrugged and said, “I didn’t feel like going. I mean, I can’t afford any of the cars that were on display. So why bother?”
Izzy said, “Who cares about cars? I went to look at the chicks. Mel’s Racing Arena Twins where there. Holy shit are they hot! I got a boner just walking past them.”
Scowling, I said, “That’s my sister and cousin, asshole. And they’re obviously not twins.”
Kyle laughed and said, “You have to have a dick first, before you can have a boner!”
Indignant, Izzy said a bit too loudly, “I have a dick!” A couple of girls sitting at the table next to us giggled. Izzy turned beet red.
After his color started to return to normal, Izzy said, “Well anyway, I wasn’t really looking at your sister. She’s pretty and all, but holy shit your cousin rocks.
Hunter said, “Yeah, she can sit on my face anytime!”
“I don’t appreciate you saying that crap about my cousin,” I said, fuming. “Trust me. If she sat on your face, she’d fart.” I guess I used to be like my friends before I became a weekend girl. Now I’m bothered by this talk in general towards girls. I know they don’t know about my duality, but fuck. Hearing them talk about me this way is really pissing me off.
Hunter put up his hands and said, “Whoa. Chill, dude. Just remember though. If that bitch wasn’t your cousin, you’d be like us, not able to get within fifty feet of her.”
I stood up and said, “Don’t call her a bitch!”
Hunter laughed and said, “What? Are you going to hit me? Sit down. Of course she’s a bitch. She beautiful, she’s sexy and she unobtainable. And she knows exactly what she’s doing. When she shakes that little ass of hers in that miniskirt, she knows she’s giving every guy blue balls. Shit man, even my dad jerked off in the bathroom to her picture.”
I did not need to hear that. I wanted to throw up. These were all my nerd gaming buddies and now they’ve turned into sex fiends. And from the looks and cat-calls I got when in my drag strip outfit, I knew guys might find me attractive, which was hard enough to deal with. But this…this just made me ill.
“Okay, guys. Knock it off,” I said. “Let’s change the subject.”
Izzy said, “Yeah, Hunter. Stop talking about the girl I love that way.”
Kyle just sat there and laughed.
Hunter shrugged, turned to me and said, “Is it my fault your cousin is a future porn star?”
Mom met me at the front door as I entered the house. My sister Holly was sitting on the couch watching TV. Thank God my dad wasn’t home from work yet.
I said, “Gee, Mom. You’re home early.”
Scowling, Mom said, “I took off early so I’d be here when you got home. What’s this call I got about you getting into a fight at school?”
Frowning, I said, “Hunter called me a bitch and a future porn star!”
Looking surprised, Mom said, “Why would Hunter call you that?”
Throwing my arms up, I said, “Not me. Callie! It made me mad, so I punched him.”
Scowling again, Mom said, “Sit on the couch next to Holly.” She then walked over and turned off the TV.
Holly said, “Mommmm! I was watching that!”
Mom folded her arms and said, “Look girls. This has…Awk! Look, this has got to stop. If your father ever found out what you’re doing, he’d skin all of us! This has already gone too far. Wasn’t it just supposed to be a onetime thing? I went with your father the other day to the auto parts store. And there I saw not only my daughter, but also my son dressed up as prostitutes selling motor oil! And to hear my own husband say when he looked at Caleb’s picture, ‘Wow. That’s one hot chick.’ I almost lost it right there.”
Holly said, “Dad doesn’t need to know we’re doing this, even though he did give Caleb the go-ahead. I know Callie and I can finish out our contracts with Mel without Dad finding out.”
Mom shook her head and said, “I’ve never liked this. You shouldn’t be lying to your father. He’s probably forgotten that you were even doing this.”
I said, “Mom, we’re not lying. We’re just withholding the truth.”
Mom frowned at me and said, “I’m going to have a talk with that Mr. Maddog.”’
Holly grinned and said, “That’s not his name, Mom.”
Folding her arms again, Mom said, “This isn’t funny, young lady. I want Caleb to stop doing this today!”
Sounding a bit too whiny, I said, “But Mom! The money is really good. Have I pestered you or Dad lately to buy gold for World of Tanks? Now that I’m over the initial shock of dressing as a girl, I’m actually having fun being at the race track. It’s amazing to hear people yelling and cheering when you walk out on that platform! Everyone from kids to old geezers wanting your autograph on a picture of you; it’s intoxicating! Our contract runs out in December, which is two months away. I want to do this through next summer. It won’t be long before I have a beer belly and stubble on my face like Dad and I won’t be able to do this anymore. Don’t make us quit, Mom. Dad might not approve, but I have to live my life, not his!”
Mom slowly golf-clapped. She frowned and said, “Nice speech, Caleb. I think that’s the most words you’ve strung together at one time in probably three years. But it doesn’t change the fact that you’re going out there and fooling people. It may be just acting like I said before, but it’s going too far. I mean, it’s deeply disturbing that your own father thinks you’re hot.”
Holly frowned and said, “It’s not Callie’s fault Dad is attracted to seventeen year old girls. The thing is Mom, is that Callie is just acting; playing a character. Don’t you find it amazing that she’s famous? Okay, it’s only locally, but she and I are both getting modeling offers from local clothing stores. I think it’s really cool.”
Not budging, Mom said, “You think it’s cool that your brother accepted a date with not only a man, but a man too old for her…uh, him?”
I said, “I admit that was stupid, Mom. I’m not going to do that again. In fact, Holly is going to see if Eric from the track is interested in being my boyfriend so guys won’t ask me out anymore.”
Raising an eyebrow and somehow managing to look even more pissed off, Mom said, “Boyfriend? You want a boyfriend now?”
Holly scowled at me and said, “A pretend boyfriend, Mom. Callie and Eric wouldn’t actually date. It’s just to throw off the wolves. And I haven’t even asked him yet if he wants to do it. But. But! Be that as it may, we’re a successful team, Mom. I’d hate to throw this all way.”
Mom frowned even more and said, “So you’re using your little brother”
Holly jumped up and shouted, “That’s not fair, Mom! And besides, Callie is more popular than I am! And what she says is true. She can’t be a model for much more than another year. You don’t want her to miss an opportunity!”
Mom was not convinced. She said, “An opportunity to dress like a prostitute? That’s what you girls look like! Not girls. I mean…you know what I mean. It’s a small step up from what you’re doing to flashing your breasts in some porn magazine!”
“I don’t even have boobs, Mom!” I exclaimed.
“Mom, that’s just crazy and you know it!” said Holly. “We’re just trying to have some fun and get paid doing it. We’re not going to be in some porn magazine. That’s not how you raised us!”
Scowling, Mom said, “I didn’t raise my son to be a scantily clad sex pot selling oil to horny men, but there he is.”
“It’s just a picture, Mom,” I said. “It doesn’t mean anything.”
Looking at Holly, Mom said, “Your father doesn’t much like these posters and ads. He didn’t mind you being a model who hands out trophies. Now your picture is plastered in every tool and automotive store in town. People ask him at work when your next poster is going to come out. It embarrasses the crap out of him.”
“He shouldn’t be,” said Holly. “We’re both fully dressed. Nothing shows in the pictures. Mel makes money on them, we make money from them. You should be proud of your two beautiful daughters.”
Mom laughed and said, “I am proud of my beautiful daughter. But I’m worried about my son. And I am worried about both of you showing so much flesh. I really don’t want people thinking my kids are just sluts.”
Holly said, “There’re going to be perverts no matter what we wear, Mom. Look. If it makes you feel better, I’ll tell Mel to tone down the sex appeal if we do another set of pictures.”
Mel was grinning broadly as he waved us over to him after we arrived for the day’s racing events. As we approached, Mel said, “I know you need to get dressed, but we have a few minutes. I’m going to pop if I have to wait until the events are over!”
Furrowing her brow, Holly said, “What’s up, Mel. I’ve never seen you so giddy.”
“Girls, listen to this. This is big news. Big, big news!” Mel paused a few moments to catch his breath. He said, “I just got off the phone a few minutes ago with a big name producer. Here’s the deal! You’re not going to believe this!”
“What!?” Holly almost shouted.
“This producer wants to sign you girls up, with me as your agent, to a feature in the July edition of Maxim magazine. And! And this is even bigger. He wants you girls to appear live at several NASCAR events. Mostly as eye candy, but also to promote various products along with a national promotion of Pennzoil. He wants to do a contest where the winner gets a date in Hollywood with both of you! Isn’t that awesome!?”
Mel was met with silence. “Isn’t it?”
I looked over at Holly and said, “Mom and Dad are going to kill us.”
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