I was alone…staring at the clean, white ceiling. I thought about getting on the web, but felt relaxed and content to just lie there and let my eyes close and think about was would be happening in the next few days…the next few weeks. Suddenly, I thought of my dad. He didn’t know that he no longer had a son. I wanted him to know. I wanted him to realize that I would not be stumbling in his footsteps. The bad memories dissipated and I remembered the few times my dad smiled at me or held me. He was not soft like my mom, but hard and strong. Once I hit him on the arm just to see how hard it was. It was like hitting a wall. He just looked at me and said, “Be still”. Now, I felt a twinge of pity for him. Where was he? Was he even alive? Maybe it was better that I didn’t know. I visualized him lying in an alley with an empty whiskey bottle in his hand. Even he didn’t deserve that. I wanted to see him. I wanted him to tell me I’m pretty. I wondered about the likelihood of that. I realized how little I knew about him. His reaction to me could be anywhere from complete acceptance to a scene requiring police intervention. I whispered a short prayer for my dad. I asked God to let me see him again. I decided to tell my mom how I felt. I hoped I could tell her without hurting her feelings.
Various nerves below my waist began sending signals to my brain that they were waking up. I smiled when I thought about nerves waking up confused about everything down there being rearranged. I could imagine them talking among themselves about the missing parts and wondering what the new cavern was for. Maybe some of them would say they heard rumors about 2 new mountains growing up north. The estrogens would say, “It’s true. The mountains are part of our work. We were introduced into the body just in time. The testosterones were preparing to do some major damage, but the blockers came in with us and decimated them. While you nerves slept, a big knife came in and destroyed the system that was supplying new testosterones, and made the rest of these changes. We must continue our work. Generally, our job is fat and hair distribution. We differentiate the body from a body damaged by testosterone. We also prepare the body for caring for a child. Unfortunately, this body is missing some of the equipment required for conception and childbearing, but that is not our concern.” Also present were some burly armed guards…the antibiotics. They stood ready to kill on sight any infection and allow the body to naturally heal. I would say the drugs were bringing on such thoughts, but I could think some pretty silly things without any drugs.
A nurse came to check on me. I told her I thought I needed something for pain. She injected medicine into the tube running to my arm. It didn’t take long for the relaxed feeling to come back. I thought to myself, “This is why people get addicted to drugs.” I vowed to never become an addict. The nerves went back to sleep while the hormones and antibiotics continued their work.
I couldn’t sleep, however. I grabbed my laptop and arranged it best I could to work from a horizontal position. I decided to go shopping myself…more like window shopping. Get it…”windows shopping”? Very funny…I know.
The first thing I did was change my desktop picture. It still had the topless photo of Amie that she had put on it. I made sure to save the photo, then changed the desktop to just a plain blue background.
I went to Victoria’s Secret and Zappos. I was looking for tight fitting pants, jeans, shorts, Capri’s, etc. I wanted to show off my new body. No more bulges except where bulges were supposed to be. I thought about buying something so tight it looked like it was painted on, but then realized how trashy that would look. I needed something tight enough to show that I was a female without telling the world that I was a slut. It really didn’t matter right now. Like I said, I was only window shopping. Then, I realized that when Mrs. Adams, Amie, and my mom came back from shopping, I would probably have more clothes than I could wear in a year or two. They would not be shopping for themselves. I would probably be the topic of their conversation and the object of the entire shopping trip. Maybe a few trinkets for themselves, but mostly, “Oh, Jamie would be precious in this.” There was nothing I could do about it. I just had to be appreciative, and I was sure that most of their purchases would be adorable.
I switched my web surfing to colleges. It wouldn’t be all that long until both Amie and I would need to start making career decisions and basing our college choice on those decisions. The thought of Amie and me going to different colleges was dreadful. I didn’t think I could stand it. Maybe Amie and I needed some time apart? Oh…hell no! We had to go to the same college even if I had to major in basket weaving or candle making.
What about after college? She had hinted that we would always be together, but things happen…people change. Laws had recently been changed so that we could be married as two females. I couldn’t see myself asking her to marry me. That just wasn’t how we were. No, that decision would have to come from her. I was sure my mom would have no problem with it but wasn’t sure about Amie’s parents. They would want grandchildren, and such wonderful people should have grandchildren. So Amie would have to do the childbearing. Maybe we could get some Einstein quality sperm from a sperm bank. Now I realized I was getting ahead of myself. I was still in Thailand staring at the clean, white ceiling.
I wandered aimlessly around the web…took some quizzes, looked at news. There was no good news, of course, so I started looking at some of the photos I had on my computer. There were very few new photos, and I realized I needed to get my digital camera out and start taking photos again. Of course, every photo had to go through Photoshop before it could be printed or put up on the web. Every photo needed some kind of work. Some just need lighting or color adjustments. Others needed unwanted people or objects removed. I looked at my photos and found one of Amie I could work on. She couldn’t be made any more beautiful, of course, so I did whatever adjustments I could think of. Then, it occurred to me to put her face on some of the outfits I had looked at earlier. It didn’t matter what outfit I chose, Amie looked good in anything. Of course, she looked good in nothing also, but I steered clear of anything like that. It just seemed disrespectful.
I shut down the laptop and closed my eyes. I was tired. Major surgery puts a lot of stress on the body. I let myself drift off to sleep.
I was awakened by the ladies returning from their shopping trip. I was right about their purchases. They showed me a few of the things they had bought for me. I had to admit, they were beautiful. They asked me how I felt. I got the impression they thought I would be well down the road to recovery. It’s true; I would have gone home immediately if someone would be willing to carry me to a plane. Dr. Adams could give me a knockout pill again and I would be home in Texas in what would seem like a matter of minutes.
As if they heard my thoughts from another room, both doctors came into my room. Dr. Adams floored us with, “How about we all go home tomorrow?”
I did my “mouth breather” impersonation again. Amie gave me a look of disapproval and I shut my mouth quickly. “Really”, I asked, “how?”
“I’ve arranged with an old friend to borrow his private jet. It’s on its way over here now. It will be equipped with all the equipment needed to transport you home. It will be just the 5 of us, 2 pilots, and 2 flight attendants. As much as I enjoy visiting with Dr. Chet, I need to get back to my patients and your mom needs to get back to her clients. I think if she doesn’t get back soon, a couple of them could get ‘the chair’.” He looked at my mom and smiled. She smiled and shook her head.
“I sent them legal advice”, she added. “I told them, ‘don’t sit down.’”
“Good!” said Dr. Adams. “I hope they listen to you better than some of my patients listen to me.”
I turned to Dr. Chet. “Please don’t be offended that we’re leaving so fast, but I need Texas air to heal.”
Dr. Chet shook his head. “Homesickness is real. I haven’t checked, but I’ll bet it’s listed in the medical journals. As far as I know, there’s only one cure…home.”
I lay back, “Now I won’t be able to sleep. I’m waiting on a plane.”
“It will be here very early in the morning, but I think the crew will need some rest before taking off again.”
“Dr. Adams”, I said thoughtfully, “you’re so amazing, I’ll bet if I looked up the word ‘amazing’ in the dictionary, your picture would be there.”
“Well, it’s nice to know that at least one patient thinks I’m not that bad a doctor. I’ll tell you, though; Dr. Chet is an amazing surgeon. I don’t want to get graphic, but I’ll tell you that you will benefit from his skill for the rest of your life. Rest, Jamie. Your ride is on its way. Texas is missing 5 Texans, but we won’t be missing much longer.”
I lay back again and everyone left except Amie. I thought for a little, then told her, “I can’t imagine what it’s like to have such a wonderful dad. I’ve been thinking about my dad. I want him to know he has a daughter. It just occurred to me that if he’s on drugs when I tell him, it might do something to his mind. He might not be able to process the information.”
“We’ll find him”, Amie assured me. “That will be our project when we get home. Of course, we better see what your mom has to say about it.”
“I hope it doesn’t hurt her feelings that I want to see him.”
“I don’t think it will. It’s natural that you want to see him. She may know more about where he is and what he’s doing than you think.”
I was pretty sure Amie was right. She seemed to understand a lot about such things. Once again, I had Amie to guide me about this subject. I lay back, closed my eyes and relaxed a bit while I waited for my ride.
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