The Daily Dormouse. (aka Bike, est. 2007) Part 2728 by Angharad Copyright© 2015 Angharad

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This is a work of fiction any mention of real people, places or institutions is purely coincidental and does not imply that they are as suggested in the story.
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“You’ve eaten all the ice cream.”

“What all of it?” Trish didn’t appear to believe me.

“Yes, all of it.”

“Even the tub in the other freezer?”

“There isn’t one in the other freezer, that was it, the one you finished yesterday.”

This borders on negligence,” she said as if preparing to bring charges.

“I didn’t eat it, you lot did.”

“It’s our job to eat it yours to buy it, Mummy.”

“Sounds like I get a bit of a raw deal,” I replied to our resident genius.

“Not my fault, you chose to keep us.”

“Hmm, perhaps it’s time to get rid of the old ones and get some new ones,” I said as a joke of the lead balloon sort.

“You’re gonna get rid of us?” she gasped tears dribbling down her face.

“I could, but only of the moaning variety,” I continued never learning from my past mistakes.

“Do I moan, Mummy?”

“What was that about ice cream?”

“Oh it doesn’t matter, Mummy.”

“I’m glad we agree on something.”

She rushed off and a while later Meems appeared. “Is you gonna get wid of us if we compwains?”

“I could do couldn’t I?”

“Don’t get wid of me, Mummy, I wuv you,” she clamped on to my waist as if she was frightened a tidal wave would wash her away.

“I love you too, Meems.”

She was sobbing as she pleaded with me not to get rid of her. It was then the penny dropped and I felt about two inches tall. Oops, didn’t quite describe the calamity I’d created for myself this time around.

I took her hand and we walked up to their bedroom where Trish and Livvie were crying and packing. “What are you doing?” I asked.

“You said you were gonna get rid of us,” was sobbed at me.

“I was joking.”

“No you weren’t, you said you were going to get some new children because we moan too much.”

“It was a joke,” a rather bad one.

“I didn’t mean to complain about the ice cream, Mummy, don’t get rid of me.” In seconds I had three sobbing children pleading with me. I hugged them and realised rather late how vulnerable they all felt. How stupid can you get—or should I say, can I get.

“Look, all of you, I’m not getting rid of anyone—okay? You are all staying here as long as you want—do you all understand?” That was pretty categorical, the only problem was they weren’t operating on reason or listening, they were all on emotional wavelengths—running on fear.

I was so glad Hannah and Danni had gone out for a walk with the baby and Cate. I don’t think I’d have coped with more than three of them in such distressed states. It was an hour before they calmed down enough to listen to my assurances that they could all stay with me because I loved them all.

Then, making them all wash their faces, we went off in the car to the nearest supermarket and bought two tubs of ice cream—perhaps bribery would work where words hadn’t. By the time we were home the others were back, so most of the first tub was consumed, helped by Stella and I having some as well. That’s the problem with having a large family, it’s like a swarm of locusts—of the ice cream eating variety.

“What got them all upset?” asked Stella.

“I rather stupidly said I was going to trade them in for less complaining children.”

“Oh, really clever stuff.”

“I realised that as soon as I said it,” okay, it took a bit longer than that but she doesn’t know it, does she?

“What possessed you to say it?”

“I was a bit miffed with Trish suggesting it was my job to buy ice cream and hers to eat it.”

“Sounds about right to me,” she replied.

“I don’t know why but it just caught me on the raw and I said perhaps I should swap the older kids for new ones.” She looked at me as if I’d just confessed to killing dormice. “It was a mistake, but I did it.”

“Mistake—that’s putting it politely...”

“I know.” I felt bad enough with three sobbing kids, this took it to a new level of torture.

“You know how sensitive they are—they’re every bit as bad as you are when you think someone is questioning your femaleness.”

Oh shit, that bad? “I tried to tell them I love them, what else can I say?”

“Want me to speak to them?”

“Is that going to make any difference?”

“I don’t know, but at least I’m trying to help.”

“I realise that, Stella, and I’m really grateful.”

“You don’t sound it.”

“I am, but I’m also disgusted at my own stupidity, but have no one to blame but myself.”

“Oh look out, world, Cathy’s going to have a major guilt trip—don’t try and stop her, she loves every second of it.”

“Oh don’t, Stella. I said I was sorry.”

“Wait here, I’ll go and talk with them.” So that’s what I did, waited for big sister to go in and convince them I was an idiot and really sorry for pushing their buttons. She was gone about twenty minutes, returning as the rain splashed against the windows—this is supposed to be summer. The weather seems as out of kilter as everything else.

“Right, they understand it was a joke that went wrong and have accepted a thousand pounds each and tub of ice cream every day, plus they expect you to do their homework for them and they want to watch Game of Thrones, on satellite.”

“What?”

She roared with laughter, “The look on your face was priceless.”

“Gee thanks, Stella.”

“Look, I explained it was a mistake and that they’d all still be living here when they were sixty and you’d be ninety four and still messing everything up.”

“How can I be thirty four years older than they are, I’m not thirty two yet?”

“Dramatic licence, don’t complain I just saved your bacon.”

“And they’re ten years old, so I’d only be eighty four when they were sixty.”

“A mere detail.”

“I’m a scientist, we deal in details.”

“Cathy, you take everything too literally.”

“Now you sound like Simon.”

“I’m his sister if you can remember that far back.”

“Nothing wrong with my memory.”

“Except you can’t remember how upset these kids get when you pretend to ditch them.”

“All right point taken.”

“Good, just remember and learn from it.”

“I will, I never want them to feel unwanted, we all love them.”

“I know, they know too it’s just now and again they wonder if it’s all going to go pear shaped, remember they have experience of being dumped or abused or both...”

“I promise they won’t ever feel like that in this house.”

“Even in jest?”

“Not even in jest.”

“Well done, sis.” We hugged.

“And, Stella...”

“Yeah...”

“Thank you.”