The Daily Dormouse. (aka Bike, est. 2007) Part 2559 by Angharad Copyright© 2015 Angharad

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The radio informed that the motorway was blocked in both directions by accidents—oh joy. Now I’d have to do it by A roads. At least they should have been gritted because the outside air temperature was minus two. Danni continued to slumber in her seat which she’d tilted back to recline a little. Part of me even considered going back into Reading and staying overnight going home in the daylight. Except with a night of frost on top of snow, it would be even more treacherous to drive on. If the truth be told, I wished Simon was with me and better still, doing the driving.

I pulled into the side and reprogrammed the sat nav to take us home without use of motorways. It wasn’t happy—only I could have an argument with a machine—and lose. The route was fairly straightforward, ain for Basingstoke, then Alton, then Petersfield down the A3 and onto the M27 and home. Driving at much less speed than I usually go, we trundled towards Basingstoke, another dormitory town for commuters to London. The snow seemed to ease here and I found the ring road and even glanced a sign for Alton. So far so slow.

The radio, ever a source of delight, now informed me that the A3 was closed due to a pile up in the snow. Things were not getting any better. Oh well, keep on to Petersfield and have a look at the map, besides, the speed we were going it would be spring before we got there. As if to improve my mood the snow came down in large thick flakes, it didn’t.

Danni woke up as we stopped behind a car which presumably had stopped behind one in front of it. It is suggested this is how traffic jams begin, I wasn’t going to argue. “Where are we?” she asked yawning.

“Somewhere in Hampshire, I hope heading towards Petersfield.”

“Why we goin’ there?”

“I thought it was such a pretty name, I’d like to see it.”

“It’s dark an’ it’s snowin’.”

“So it is, I’m so glad you came I hadn’t noticed either.”

The car in front started to do a turn in the road and I could now see a line of red lights going off into the distance. He wound down his window before driving off and shouted, “Accident up there, road’s closed.”

Brilliant, now do I sit in the traffic and hope the road is cleared before I get to pensionable age, or turn round and try another route.

“Where are we?” asked my daughter looking at the atlas.

“Somewhere between Basingstoke and Alton.”

“Geez, Mum, it’s all tiny little roads everywhere if you turn off in the dark we’ll get lost.”

“Nothing is moving, we could be here all night. If we could get to the A31 we could either go up to Guildford or down towards Winchester.”

“It’s quite exciting though, innit?”

“Is it, I hadn’t noticed,” mind you I think I was running on depleted adrenalin having used most of it getting this far.

“Get ready to set the sat nav, I’m going to turn around.”

“Okay,” she piped not sounding half as worried as I felt.

The Jaguar is not a small car and turning it round on a country lane is not easy, especially in a blizzard, in being a white car, there was perhaps a slight extra risk in snow of not being seen by other road users. Finally we drove off again and in the pitch dark and quietude of the snow, the windscreen wipers seemed unduly loud. I’d switched off the radio because it was distracting me, so everything felt muffled.

We found a village or hamlet called Lasham and we turned left towards Golden Pot—I know, it sounds as if I’m making this up, but I’m not. “Turn right here somewhere,” suggested Danni and we nearly ended up in someone’s driveway. A couple of hundred yards further on I found the road and we entered Alton.

The snow eased off and as we approached a pub with a large car park Danni asked if we could stop for a wee. I pulled into the pub and parked the car. I thought I’d have one as well and perhaps a coffee to keep me alert. Refreshed, we set off again as far as the A31 only to find everything was crawling along. I opted for the B3006 which according to the map showed it was pretty well a direct link to the A3 near Petersfield, well Greatham not far from Liss. I was nearly on home ground, I’ve cycled all round here—okay it was daylight and not snowing—but you get my drift, not a snowdrift.

Seemed as if quite few other people had the same idea, including the prat behind who had his fog-lights on. The snow had eased somewhat, so it was no longer blizzard conditions. I flipped on my rear fog lights a couple of times but he didn’t seem to get the message, so I left them on. They are so bright it’s uncomfortable to drive behind them. I suspect they can be seen from the international space station. We hit traffic and came to a stop, the guy from behind got out of his car and tapped on my window.

“Switch off those fucking lights, it’s blinding me.”

“Switch yours off then.”

“Fuck off, just because you’ve a fuckin’ Jaguar don’t mean you own the fuckin’ road.”

Just then the traffic moved and I drove off, someone was beeping him from behind.

“Nice guy, if all men are like him I’m glad I’m a girl,” Danni muttered and I tapped her leg.

“Take it from me, kiddo, they’re not, but there are quite a few like that.” I switched off the fog lights and before our friend with the limited vocabulary caught us up we reached the A3 and drove on to Petersfield.

ET phoned home to say where we were and whatever the blockage had been it had been cleared and we sailed down the road towards the M27. We were nearly home and the fields were green near the coast. If the truth be told, they looked black in the dark but at least they weren’t white as they’d been back up country.

It was midnight when we got home and I felt exhausted. We ate the sandwiches, or some of the ones David had made for us—I put the rest in the fridge while Si unloaded the car. I’d take sandwiches with me for my lunch tomorrow—should be nicer than the refectory ones.

We related our drive back in gruesome detail, Danni telling Simon about the lout with the foul mouth. He shook his head and muttered something I didn’t catch. Danni was sent up to bed a moment later as she had school tomorrow, but then I had work to go to and another meeting with finance. I asked Daddy to sit in with me and he agreed. I hoped with him there I wouldn’t go off on one and also that the accountants wouldn’t try to get even. Apparently, their manager was coming with them. What a fun life I lead.