Mrs. McMillan sinks into her couch...with an audible gasp simultaneous to my own… I once again feel faint. I sway a bit and Shauna, who had not heard what was said, grabs me. She gives me and her Mom a questioning look. Mrs. McMillan is deathly pale as she speaks into my phone, “Lily? Is that really you? You mean that…Joy…Joey…is my…nephew…niece…whatever? O…M…G…” She drops the phone and I pick it up in the middle of the uproar… I am barely able to speak and say, “Mom? What is going on? Are you saying that I am in your sister’s house…that Shauna is my…cousin?” It is quiet for a minute, then Mom says, “Yes…it is true…I don’t know how…or why, but God has seen fit to bring our families back together… Please let your Aunt know that I am SO sorry for…not being in touch…and we will work it all out…later…but I have to go… I am so sorry, Jo…oy…, I have to go…the plane is boarding. I love you!” The phone goes dead…

I sink down next to…my…Aunt. I feel drained—likely as pale as she is. I say, “I am so sorry. I don’t know what to say… Shauna, maybe it is best if you take me to the bus station—I am sure that I can get a bus back to the college…or something…” Shauna looks at me, confused, and her dad…my…uncle…says, “Nonsense! I know that we can’t fully celebrate, because your father is missing…BUT, there is NO way we are going to turn you away…not after we finally have you here! Jen. Jen, SNAP OUT OF IT! This is your…well, your sister’s child! The one you have been longing to meet…for sixteen years…don’t you have anything to say?”

To say that all Hell breaks loose at that point would be an understatement. Shauna comes over and hugs me tightly. She has a wondered look in her eyes as she says, “Cousins…?” Mrs. McMillan comes over and nearly smothers me with a hug like I have never experienced. When she finally lets me come up for air, I see that tears are streaming down her cheeks. She says, “So…I don’t know what to say. We have been wanting to meet you for so long…and here you are. I wish I could say it was under better circumstances…but I am SO glad to finally get to meet you. Come…let’s eat some lunch and…talk…”

I am ushered into the dining room and we are sitting around the table several minutes later. We have not even dished out the food, all of us still a bit in shock, when another, older lady rushes into the room. She gives me a haunted look and asks, “Is it true? Are you really my granddaughter?” Aunt Jen, as she is now insisting I call her, speaks up and says, “Come in, Mom; this is indeed your grandchild—we are still working on how to deal with the ‘daughter’ part…” The older lady, the grandmother I never even knew I had, comes over and hugs me. She says, “I never thought this day would happen—so much was said…so many bitter things… But, you are here…you are here…” She sits down, with the same shocked look as the rest of us, and then…my stomach growls very loudly. That relieves the tension and everyone laughs. Uncle Jeff starts passing the food around and it tastes wonderful. We are however all still somewhat subdued in our conversation while we eat—there are so many elephants in the room that it is hard to count them all…

Aunt Jen insists that we just leave the dishes piled up in the sink and go back to the living room to deal with all of those elephants… I start by telling how I wound up at St. Paul’s to begin with—at Mom’s insistence while Dad was away. Shauna picks up with why I am sitting here dressed as a girl—misunderstandings and all. Finally, I broach the subject of my Dad. There is an awkward silence, then my ‘new’ Grandma asks, “Sweetie, I am sorry about your father. I sincerely hope, for your sake, that he is found safe and sound. I can’t say that I have many good things to say about the whole incidents that led to your mother leaving us, but I still love your mother very much—and you, too, even though I have never been able to meet you. So, tell me, how has your mother been? Has she been happy…there…?”

I can’t help but think about how unfair that question is, but if the events of the last few days have taught me anything, it is to keep an open mind long enough to something…and someone…a chance. So I choke down my rising bile and take a deep breath before I respond. In as even a tone as I can manage, I say, “As far as I know, my mother has led a happy life in our town. I know that you all have your notions about my hometown, some of which are likely true; but things are also just as likely not as black and white as you assume. I don’t know the story behind Mom leaving you—other than a very short version that I got from Shauna when we had no idea that we were talking about our same family. What I can say is that my Dad has always treated my Mom like a queen, as far as I can tell. Mom has always looked out for my sister, my brother, and I—and has never once complained about anything. I have never gotten the impression that she is bitter about her choices—even when she told me that she wanted me to go to college—to have the chance that she gave up to have me—it was not bitter; just a wish for me to have the opportunity—something that I would not have had otherwise. My Dad is not big on education—he has done very well working his way up through the ranks with just a high school diploma. It is not that he has anything against education—he just doesn’t see the need; as is with most of the people in my town. As you know, it is very blue collar…” I am shaking a bit by then, my nerves getting to me…

Aunt Jen looks at me and says, “Mom, I think that is enough of that for now. Lily has said she will be in touch—those are questions you should be asking HER, not poor Jo…oy… But, did I hear you say you have a brother and a sister?” I smile, thankful for the change of subject and tell them about Amy and Josh. Finally, though, we get to the last elephant of the day… Uncle Jeff looks at me and says, “OK, now it is my turn. I know we are not blood relatives, but in this family—family is family. I can’t stand to see you forced into that outfit…and role…against your wishes. My family has given a LOT of money to St. Paul’s over the years and I think that I can get this straightened out. If you want, I can loan you some clothes and you can get out of that dress.” I give him a grateful look and say, “That means a lot to me, Uncle Jeff. Having your support means more than you know. But, I got myself into this mess and…I think I am meant to get myself out. Two days ago, I would have jumped at your offer. However, assuming I stay at St. Paul’s through this, if Mrs. Braun does not stand up to her part of the bargain…then I may let you ‘talk’ to them.” Shauna looks at me and says, “So, that means that you want to stay on as Joy for the term?” I…slowly…nod and say, “I am SURE I will regret it by the time it is over even more than I do now, but I trust that you and the squad will treat me fairly from now on…and I will honestly attempt to learn the lessons that M.S. seems to think I can get from this.”

Shauna comes over and gives me a hug. She whispers in my ear, “Promise!” After that, Aunt Jen sends her on some mysterious errand and tells me to follow her upstairs. She shows me the guest room, where I will be staying, and asks me to undress. I blush and ask, “Don’t get me wrong, but…” Aunt Jen just laughs and says, “Joy, get used to it; it is just us girls. I just want you to strip down to your panties and bra. It is OK—I want to see what the girls have done…” She helps me unzip the dress and I let it fall to the floor. I slip off the shoes and pull down the pantyhose. I stand there, somewhat embarrassed, in only a bra and panties. Aunt Jen pales when she sees the tattoos and my belly button and says, “OK, Shauna and I are going to have a SERIOUS talk. She had no right…” I shake my head and say, “You are right, Aunt Jen, but Shauna and I have come to an understanding—it is OK. The Mother Superior has promised that the tattoos won’t be an issue when this is over with—and she healed them all, along with the piercings… The only thing that really bothers me is the one piercing that you can’t see…but…well…I can’t argue its purpose for now, I guess.” Aunt Jen doesn’t seem really surprised that M.S. had healed me, but is livid when she finds out why I will be sitting down to pee for the foreseeable future…and makes me show her. I say, “At least it makes it easier for me to be…flat…down there…the way it all sort of curves now…”

Shauna comes in a few minutes later and is somewhat surprised to see me standing there, basically naked, in front of her very irate mother. After giving Shauna a tongue-lashing and promising to continue the discussion later, Aunt Jen takes a shopping bag from Shauna and asks me to take off my bra. By now, I am beyond worrying and struggle to undo it. I finally get it undone and drop it on the bed. Aunt Jen has me lay down and uses a solvent from the bag to remove the large breast forms. I sit up and feel strangely light without them. I look a little confused and Aunt Jen says, “We are going to set a few things right…you are going to be a respectable niece. I still can’t believe…” She pulls a different bra from the bag and explains that is a ‘padded, push-up bra’ that is ‘more appropriate for a girl my age’. She helps me put it on and then stuffs in some smaller silicone forms to help fill it out. When she is done, I look much more like a normal girl—with a B-cup…and much less like a junior porn star. I put my dress back on and Shauna tells me to leave off the hose as she hands me some fuzzy slippers to wear around the house.

We go back downstairs and I help clean up the kitchen…well, sort off, since I really don’t know where anything goes—let alone how to do what I was raised to think of as “girl’s chores”… I find that there is an easy routine between Aunt Jen, Shauna, and…Grandma… as they quickly finish up the work and leave the kitchen sparkling clean. Aunt Jen then says, “Shauna, why don’t you take Joy upstairs and get ready to go to the mall with your Grandma and me. I think we have some further work to do before I can relax about what you girls have done to Joy…” Shauna rolls her eyes and takes me up to freshen my makeup and put my hose and shoes back on…

After several hours of shopping, my wardrobe is more complete and greatly toned down. I even have some girly jeans and leggings, along with several tops…and flat shoes. Aunt Jen says, as I sigh when I try them on, “Just so you know, I agree with Shauna that heels should be your staple shoes…but, there are times when flats are fine…” I also receive several more pairs of earrings to tone down my look; the biggest difference being that they are all smaller and less…showy. The hoop in my nose is also replaced with a tiny diamond stud, which suits me just fine. All in all, when it is said and done, I look much more like a typical teenage girl—which is sort of scary to me that that is even possible.

I am in ‘my’ room sorting through my new things with Shauna when my cell rings again. Shauna grimaces at me as I dig through…my…purse to find it and says, “First thing when you hang up, we are changing that ring tone…something sexy…like ‘Fireball’, or something… I roll my eyes and answer it, “Hi Mom, are you there? Have you heard anything?” I hear her sigh and say, “Yes, I am in BC. There is still no news and the search has been called off for the night. It was such a small plane and is such a large area to search… So…how are you getting on there? I am sorry you got thrown into the middle of…my bad history… I really do love them all there and we will work it all out… I have been thinking about it all day along with worrying about your Dad.”

We talk a little longer and I hang up. Shauna looks at me and asks, “You OK?” I nod and she swipes my phone. She laughs and says, “So, now for that ringtone…and don’t forget to take your pill…”