The Daily Dormouse. (aka Bike, est. 2007) Part 2224 by Angharad Copyright © 2013 Angharad All Rights Reserved.

I drove Sammi to the hospital after taking the girls to school. She sat with her handbag on her lap. She’d left her phone and computer at home after I cautioned her she could get them pinched. However, once she was recovered sufficiently to use them, I’d bring them in for her. She reluctantly agreed.

The car parked, we walked up to the admissions office and then up to the ward. She had the bed next to the window which was excellent–she’d be able to use her wi-fi device to get on the net, to access her facebook page and so on. I had no interest in having one of those even if it would help me sell more of my dormouse books. In my opinion it would also enable more people to become more aware of me–I’m shy, so I make films? Yeah–okay, go figure. I don’t do social networking so don’t look for me twittering either–load of saddos.

I’ve learned that I don’t need to be in contact with someone every two seconds, in fact I seem able to cope with several hours of solitude without needing to tweet about it or post photos of it on fb. I get enough spam now don’t need that lot as well.

I settled Sammi in kissed her goodbye and left her to sit in the chair by her bed with a book. A nurse was walking purposefully towards her holding something which might just be a suppository. I made my get away promising to come and see her later.

The day before she’d had a Brazilian wax; so at least she didn’t have to shave although in another week she’d probably feel like she had a porcupine in her panties; or at least a hedgehog. Saw another dead one, in the hospital car park, why people can’t see them and avoid running them over annoys me. If I can see them, so should others.

Danni was a bit moody this morning. She’s the only one now who hasn’t been ‘sorted’ and as I’ve said before, I’m still not convinced she’s transsexual, though given the time she’s spent as girl, I do believe she has some transgender element.

When I got home Danni showed off. Her tutor was ill and had sent her some homework by email, but she was wandering round the house seeking excuses to avoid doing it.

“Danni, please go and do the work your tutor set you.”

“Yeah, in a minute.”

“No, not in a minute–now, please.”

“Get off my back will you?”

“I think I’m going to send you to St Clare’s.”

“I won’t go.”

“You’ll do what I say, young lady.”

“I’ll tell them I’m a boy.”

“A boy with breasts?”

“I’m not taking enough to grow proper boobs, am I? Not like Pia or Cindy.”

“Dr Cauldwell has prescribed what she believes is sufficient oestrogen for you at the moment, plus the testosterone blocker and I agree with her.”

“No you don’t, you don’t want me to have breasts, do you?”

“Danni, this is getting tiresome. I told you I would support whatever Dr Cauldwell suggested. You’re growing breasts and I suspect your waistline has narrowed, so what’s the problem?”

“You don’t believe I’m a girl, do you?”

“That’s why I’ve allowed you to take hormones and bought you over a thousand pounds worth of girl’s clothes–no, I don’t think you are at all.”

My sarcasm washed over her without any of it penetrating her consciousness. She turned away from me and made towards the stairs. “Do your homework,” I called to her disappearing back.

For the next hour I was tied up with feeding Lizzie and sorting her out and it was only when David asked me if Danni would be back for lunch that I realised she’d gone out. “Back for lunch? She’s supposed to be doing some work her tutor sent her.”

“Well I passed her in the drive, she was going off on her mountain bike.”

“The little besom, you’d better call and ask her, I’ll probably blow a gasket.” I walked out to my study and sat down. She’d deliberately ignored my instruction–for that she would pay. I picked up the phone.

I sent an email to Simon who agreed with me and asked if I wanted him to speak with her. I replied that he could if he wanted but this needed some resolution and as they’d agreed to take her after Christmas, I decided that was what we were going to do. Sometime in the next few days I’d have to get her some uniforms and of course we’d have to pay the fees.

Sister Maria had offered her a place before hand but I’d declined not feeling she was secure enough to act like a school girl. Perhaps I was wrong, she certainly looked the part these days especially after the pills which had transformed her face into a much more female looking one.

I returned to the kitchen and David informed me Danni would be back in time for tea, she’d be going to see her sister in hospital in the afternoon and was having lunch at Pia’s. I’d worked out it wasn’t Cindy she was with as Cindy was in school. Oh well in a couple of weeks so would she–and I suspect that would make or break her femaleness in a matter of weeks. It would be hard to pretend to be a girl in a girl’s school unless you really believed you were, and to keep it up at that level every day.

It was going to cost me several thousand in fees but it would be almost worth it to get to the bottom of what she was up to. Part of me almost felt that she wasn’t so much a girl as someone who didn’t want to be a boy anymore. I know there are a small number of people who don’t feel they fit in either sex and an even smaller number who want to be no sex at all, but I’m not sure she fits those categories either. I called Stephanie and left her a message to say what I’d done.

She called me back at lunch. “You’ve enrolled Danni at St Clare’s?”

“Yes. She’s becoming harder to handle and I thought if I sent her there at least I’d know where she was some of the time.”

“Oh dear, like that is it?”

“Steph, she’s become so wilful recently.”

“Cathy, she’s thirteen–they’re all like that–it’s the mother daughter thing.”

“If that’s the case would she listen to Simon?”

“She might.”

“Is this due to those pills?”

“Cathy, she’s only taking a minute dose.”

“Yeah but with the testy blockers...”

“Okay, that would increase the effect but it sounds much more a teenage thing and as she sees you as her mother and you see her as your daughter, you’re both role playing perfectly.”

“I’m trying to keep her safe and hopefully enable her to make her mind up about what she wants to be in terms of career as well as gender.”

“I’m sure she appreciates what you do for her.”

“If she does she’s making a good job of hiding it from us.”

“Relax, Cathy, she’ll be alright.”

“She’s gone off to see that screwball, Pia.”

“Oh, has she?”

“What does that mean?”

“Nothing. If you want me to bring forward her next appointment, let me know. Gotta go Emily wants her lunch.”

I found her reassurance about Pia no reassurance at all. That kid was a loose cannon and if she wasn’t careful, I’d be opening the gun ports and stirring up some turbulence to see if she went overboard and sank, preferably without trace.