“My lawyer advised me that it would be okay if I provided you with all the documentation, since you all are able to independently confirm with the gynecologist that she did indeed file everything.” I reached down, opening the briefcase Max had loaned me, and handed over the documents for the three present to review, as a few more, as well as Principal Rochelle, entered.

The principal smiled and nodded. “Hello Robin. Staying out of trouble?”

I laughed. “Hey, I haven’t been down to your office since Homecoming! I gave up trying to stay out of people’s way though. When you try to be nice to everyone someone inevitably thinks you’re up to something.”

It’s funny how much things had changed in just a year. Back in San Francisco, when I was still masquerading as a boy, I loved to go all out and dress as femininely as I possibly could whenever possible. I dreaded inevitably having to change back to my plain old jeans and oversized t-shirts, knowing it meant a return to ‘Robert’.

Now, here I sat waiting for the school board to convene, and it was probably the first time since Prom that I had worn a dress. I wanted to look nice, but more than that I wanted to present a professional appearance so I’d chosen a simple business-like knee length skirt with a nice, comfortable sleeveless top, since it was still summer, after all, and a low heel.

The funny part to me was, I found myself wishing I’d just worn shorts. I actually couldn’t wait to get back home and change! Talk about a striking difference from a year ago. The school board members seemed to notice as well. At least the ones who had arrived so far had.

“Robin, I barely recognized you,” one of them commented with a respectful smile.

“I can’t believe it’s been a year already,” the other added. “Congratulations on your placement in the cheer competition last Spring.”

“Oh, thank you,” I answered warmly. “You know we were originally going to do a big Martial Arts-themed routine, but one of the judges shot it down. That judge doesn’t work there anymore though,” I added with an innocent grin.

The pair laughed. “Sounds like someone overstepped their boundaries, eh? It wasn’t because of … what this meeting is about, was it?”

I shook my head quickly. “No, they had no idea about me being transgendered. They thought that it went against the spirit of the competition somehow. Alice, my private cheer coach, told me that the school’s going to be receiving a formal letter of apology on the matter.”

“Well, for what it’s worth I don’t think you have much to worry about.”

I smiled at that and nodded. “I hope not. I’m just so tired of having to lie to my friends. I didn’t have this done for them, don’t get me wrong, but it did influence my decision. I was ready to quit basketball, and cheer, and just find a hole to hide in until I graduated. The pressure was getting to a point where I was almost physically sick.”

A third, female voice spoke up behind me. “Well, that’s all I needed to hear. I’d just like to read the affidavit for myself - you know, crossing t’s and dotting i’s,” she added as she stepped closer and sat down across the table from me. I nodded.

“My lawyer advised me that it would be okay if I provided you with all the documentation, since you all are able to independently confirm with the gynecologist that she did indeed file everything.” I reached down, opening the briefcase Max had loaned me, and handed over the documents for the three present to review, as a few more, as well as Principal Rochelle, entered.

The principal smiled and nodded. “Hello Robin. Staying out of trouble?”

I laughed. “Hey, I haven’t been down to your office since Homecoming! I gave up trying to stay out of people’s way though. When you try to be nice to everyone someone inevitably thinks you’re up to something.”

He grinned. “Now that is the story of my life,” he teased. “I’ve heard you and your friends are trying to renovate the old asylum on the outskirts of town. What’s going on with that, if you don’t mind me asking?”

“Oh, yes sir,” I answered warmly. I remembered my first school board meeting, and how incredibly nervous I felt. I was still getting used to presenting full-time, and it felt like these strangers held my future in the palm of their hands. This time though, looking around at each of them, I could see them more as human beings who just had the best interest of the other students at the school in mind. I couldn’t help feeling Principal Rochelle was making a point to remind them of my extracurricular activities, though.

“We’re helping the people who own it to get it cleaned up. In exchange for letting us use it as a haunted house this Halloween, which we’re probably just going to run on weekends through October, we’re going to help them turn it into a youth center. Ultimately it’s going to have its own basketball court, volleyball court, and hopefully a swimming pool, if they can get the zoning in order.”

I noticed one of them gave me a sidelong glance at that comment, but I continued. “What they really want to do is arrange with our local public transit so that they can get a charter bus just for kids, and I’ve got a contact on the police force that I’m going to speak with about arranging for a minor police presence in the area for their protection. After the incident with the guy who tried to kidnap me and my friend last summer...” I trailed off, and Principal Rochelle frowned.

“I’d completely forgotten about that incident.”

“I wish I could,” I sighed. “I still have nightmares about that day sometimes. And I know Allison does as well. She just doesn’t like to talk about it.”

“Well,” one of the school board members finally spoke up, “It looks like everything is in order. Frankly, I see no reason why we should bar this young lady from either using the appropriate facilities, or showering with her teammates.”

“From what I’ve overheard from my daughter over the last year,” the woman added, “It actually sounds like forcing her to do otherwise has been even more of a disruption. I feel that now that her ‘birth defect’ has been corrected, that we’d only be hurting her, and the other students, if we continued to enforce these kinds of limits. She’s obviously an outstanding student.”

“She’s an outstanding girl,” Principal Rochelle responded. “A star athlete and an excellent student. I don’t mind saying that, if she keeps her grades up, she could well be Valedictorian of her class when she graduates.”

I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I quickly shook my head. “I don’t know about that sir. My friend Chelsea is so much more deserving. She’s an even bigger perfectionist than I am, too,” I added, causing the gathered adults to laugh.

“Really, I just want to be able to spend time with my friends. The breaking point for me, was back at the cheer nationals. Sasha asked me to help her with her stage makeup since we had already changed at our hotel. She made the comment that it was nice to finally have me around, and I know she meant it as a compliment, but it still hurt pretty badly.

“I realized that our locker room time is like any other time we spend together. We’re not just a bunch of girls in short skirts. We’re also not just athletes. We’re a team. We spend more time together than I do with my own mother or sister, and almost more time than I spend with my other friends.”

“Or with your girlfriend,” the woman answered with a smile. “I have a teenage daughter. These things get around. But your sexual orientation has no bearing on these proceedings. Besides,” she continued, and I finally remembered where I had seen her before. That was Eleanor Derrick, Katelyn’s mother! I hadn’t seen her in quite awhile, and she had definitely done something new with her hair. I had no idea she was on the school board now.

“You helped me reconnect with my daughter. You’ve been a good influence on her Robin, and I believe you when you say that you have your teammates’ interests at heart. I don’t want to see you quit doing what you love. So with that said,” she looked to the left and to the right, then continued, “I believe I speak for all assembled when I say, permission to use the women’s facilities, and full recognition as a female student are hereby granted.”

Part of me wanted to cry as I stood to shake each member’s hands. “Thank you. You don’t know what this means to me.”

Eleanor smiled warmly. “I know you won’t make us regret this decision. Now go enjoy what’s left of your summer.”

“Yes ma’am,” I replied warmly, gathered my briefcase, and turned to leave.

The first day of school was fast approaching, and I still needed supplies. I talked to the girls, and we all agreed that we would hit the Alpine Springs mall together, and if we still needed anything, we could head into New Haven. I had cheer practice with Jenn that morning, but practices ended early since Sasha had a dentist appointment.

After a quick shower, I left Margie’s to head next door and check on Allison. She seemed a bit apprehensive when I called her that morning. Shortly after I knocked on the door, Carol’s smiling face appeared as she opened it.

“Hi Robin!” she said cheerfully. “You’re looking for Allison, right?”

“Yeah, she seemed kind of upset when I called her this morning. Is everything okay?”

“Oh yes, dear. She had another nightmare - first one in quite awhile though. She’s down at the gun range with her father,” Carol continued.

“Gun range?” I asked, confused. She stared blankly back at me for a moment.

“You mean she never told you? Oh dear...” She frowned. “I’m sorry Robin. I assumed you knew. Why don’t you come inside and I’ll pour you a nice, cold glass of your favorite red cream soda, and we can talk about it?”

I smiled and nodded. “Sure, that sounds great. And for what it’s worth I’m not mad or anything. Whatever’s going on I’m sure she has her reasons for not telling me about it.”

I followed Carol inside, and after she poured our drinks, I sat down at the kitchen table with her. She sipped her iced tea thoughtfully for a moment before continuing.

“You know Joe is an ex-Marine, right?”

I nodded. “Yeah, he’s told me a few of his war stories. Before Ash he was the closest thing I’ve ever had to a real father figure,” I added with a smile.

Carol chuckled a little and nodded. “Well, he’s a munitions expert and certified marksman. He’s also a certified trainer. Prior to the … incident a year ago, he hadn’t spent nearly as much time as he wanted to with Allison. He felt so guilty when you girls were attacked, over not spending enough time with her mostly.

“One day, she came up to us and asked if it would be okay for her to learn to shoot. At first I was against the idea, but Joe convinced me that this could be good for her. Not only would it give her a way to channel her frustration, but it would also give them a chance to really bond.”

“That’s so sweet,” I replied, pausing to take a sip of my soda. “So that’s where she goes on Saturdays when I’m doing piano with Katelyn, or when I’m at cheer practice?”

Carol grinned, nodding. “Joe says she’s a natural. I don’t know exactly what they’re doing today, but I saw him carrying the big rifle case.”

“Do they ever go hunting?” I asked. I just couldn’t picture Allison shooting an animal, but I had to ask. Carol smiled and shook her head.

“No. She prefers paper targets.” She chuckled. “I don’t think she’d have it in her to shoot an animal, even if she believed Joe’s talk about it being more humane than letting them starve. I think she’s too much like her mother there,” she added with a soft laugh.

“I still can’t believe I hit that tiny target,” I heard Allison laugh from the foyer as the front door opened. “I swear that old guy’s jaw was going to fall off-” she stopped in her tracks at seeing me. I smiled back at her, she, dressed in a gray t-shirt and cut-off jean shorts with a rifle slung by a strap over her shoulder. Her cheeks turned bright red.

“Hey Ally,” I said casually as I stood and approached, hugging her as though nothing were wrong. “Sorry I’m a little earlier than we planned, but Sasha had a dentist appointment, so we cut practice short today.”

“Oh, um, err,” she fumbled, her cheeks turning even redder. “I’m sorry Robin. I didn’t mean to keep this from you or the others. It’s just I didn’t want you guys to think I was some kind of gun fanatic or something.”

I had to giggle. “You mean like how freaked out I was that you guys might find out I was into comic books?”

She blinked, and started to laugh. “Oh my Gosh. You’re so right. I guess Mom already told you, huh?” she asked, motioning for me to follow her.

“Yeah,” I answered, as we headed toward the stairs. She led me up and to their parents’ bedroom. I hadn’t really noticed it before, but in the far corner, a large gun display case sat. “Like I said, it’s okay. It’s like me and Kenpo. You have to do what you have to do to cope. I’d be lying if I told you I wasn’t still affected by what happened last summer.”

She carefully placed her rifle back in the case and closed it again before turning back to pull me into a hug. Tears ran down her face as she held onto me.

“It’s like, literally the one thing that makes me feel secure. When I’m out there on the range, sighting down that barrel, it’s him I see. Does that make me a bad person?” she whispered.

I shook my head. “I see his ugly face every time I snap an oak board in half. Every time I kick the practice dummy. The only time I try not to think about him is when I’m sparring because you’d kick MY butt if I hurt your boyfriend,” I teased, causing her to laugh.

“I love you Robin,” she whispered, hugging me again before wiping her eyes, just as Joe appeared. He smiled at us.

“Don’t mind me; just putting away the 50 cal.” He patted the hard-shell case in his hands and approached us. “Allison’s a natural out there, and that’s not just me being proud papa,” he added, and we both giggled.

“Oh Daddy,” she smiled. “I want to finish my handgun certification. It’s not because I want to carry. I just really want to move on to the bigger guns.”

“You will,” Joe answered, placing his hands on her shoulders before pulling her into a hug. He kissed her forehead. “I’m really proud of you. Now, if you girls will excuse me, I need to get a quick shower.” He smiled, patting my shoulder as he passed. “Good to see you again Robin. You need to stop by more often.”

I giggled. “Yes sir,” and turned back to grab Allison’s hand. “C’mon you. Shopping awaits.”

“Hey, what did the school board say anyway?” Allison asked as we headed back downstairs.

“Oh yeah, I never did tell you guys did I? I guess I just got distracted, what with Moira wanting to work with me on that song and Margie approaching her publisher about the comic.”

Allison giggled. “I thought you were going to take it easy this semester?” she asked, shooting me a grin.

“This is taking it easy,” I shot back and laughed. “If I wanted to push myself I would’ve taken a couple of college credit courses.”

Words could not accurately describe how great it felt to be back in the Dojo again. I hadn’t told anyone, but it was my Kenpo training that allowed me to get back into cheerleading so quickly. As soon as I was able to comfortably stand, I had begun testing my range of motion - carefully - but improving it slowly but surely each day through practicing my kata.

Now, standing in the empty training hall, I finally felt whole again. Ash had some things to take care of in his office, and Nikki had gone to get a bottle of water for me. With no other students arriving yet, I had the place to myself. I noticed Ash had set up his board breaking stand, but I couldn’t have known what he had in mind for my triumphant return to the Arts. Instead I occupied my time practicing with one of the practice dummies.

One of the lessons I took to heart from day one was that the force of a strike was only half the equation. Precision and speed were equally important, and together created a kind of trinity. I wasn’t trying to break the training dummy, after all, so instead focused on the speed of my strikes, the precision, and, since this particular dummy had a swivel motion that allowed to in effect ‘fight back’, on not getting clocked by it as I moved and struck. Granted my speed had nothing on the advanced students. I had a long road ahead of me.

“I never get tired of watching you do that,” Nikki giggled, offering me a towel as I turned back to her.

“You should see Josh,” I laughed. “It’s going to take years before I can even teach. I do want to teach someday though, sort of pass on to others what Ash’s given me.”

Nikki smiled as I wiped the sweat from my brow, offering me the bottle of water in her hand in exchange. “Ally told me you found out her big secret. Well, um, our big secret, sort of.”

“Our?” I asked, giving Nikki ‘The Look’. I couldn’t hold it though, and started to giggle, causing her to laugh too.

“Yeah. Unlike Ally I’m not ‘just’ learning. I’ve known how to shoot since I was a kid. Grandpa taught me, but I hadn’t really thought about it until recently. I didn’t even know Ally was keeping it a secret.”

“It’s hard for her. She doesn’t like to talk about what happened. And I have martial arts to focus my energy. I mean I have to be careful not to get carried away, but the guy’s more of a distant memory to me anymore. Ally bottled it up though. She’s only just starting to cope with it.”

“I know the feeling,” Nikki replied. “It took me years to come to grips with what that monster did to me, and I’m still kinda broken.” She sighed softly, and I wrapped her in a hug. She smiled, resting her head on my shoulder. “I love you,” she whispered.

“I love you more,” I whispered back, kissing her cheek. “You guys should go to the shooting range together sometime.”

Nikki giggled. “I was actually just thinking about asking if you’d want to go with me and Ally this weekend. I haven’t fired a gun since I was like, ten, but since her dad’s a certified instructor, I’m thinking about talking to him.”

I shook my head, but smiled. “Jenn and I are going to be doing one last focused cheer practice with Alice, but you should go. I think it’d be good for her to know we’re all behind her, that it’s really not a bad thing for her to have a focus for her feelings too.”

“Who are we talking about?” Josh asked, causing us both to jump. Allison giggled.

“You are sooo bad,” she teased as she leaned up to kiss him. He smiled innocently.

“Oh, we were just talking about our plans for this weekend,” Nikki answered, grinning.

“Did she say yes?” Allison asked, looking at me. “I mean I’ll totally understand if you don’t want to, but it’d be so cool.”

“Jenn and I are doing another cheer session with Alice tomorrow morning. That’s usually when you go isn’t it?”

Allison grinned. “Usually. But we’re going in the afternoon tomorrow. I know friends don’t have to do like, everything together, but I knew Nikki used to enjoy it when she was younger, so I wanted to extend the invitation.”

“Actually,” I answered, “It sounds like fun. I mean I’m not big on guns - honestly they terrify me, but I’d love to come and watch you guys, if that’s alright?”

Allison giggled and hugged me happily. “Yay!”

“Looks like a few more people are starting to show,” Nikki said, glancing back over her shoulder. She snuck a quick kiss before stepping over beside Allison. “Good luck tonight,” she added. The pair raced off to the side and sat just as Maria approached them.

Josh grinned as he turned to me. “So, are you ready for your test?”

“My test?” I asked. He nodded.

“Sure. If you’re ready, you can test for your next belt tonight.” He pointed to the board breaking stand, “And we’re going to have some fun tonight in honor of your return.”

“What are you guys up to?” I asked, eyeing Josh. He laughed.

“I wanted to wait until you got back. I’ve been practicing the three board break. I want to try five tonight. They’re pine boards so I think I can do it.”

“That’s sweet, but why wait for me?” I asked, a little confused. His smile brightened.

“Because you’re next,” he replied simply.

“Uhm... This isn’t one of those Wuxia ‘I will destroy you’ things is it?” I asked teasingly, and he started to laugh.

“Oh, God no. I just meant that it’s tradition here for students graduating to Purple belt to test their striking power.” He paused and lowered his voice. “It’s actually a test of how well you listen to instruction. You’ll see what I mean.”

“Ohh.”

“Excellent, Robin,” Ash said proudly as I stood to position and bowed to Josh, my sparring partner. He hadn’t gone easy on me, but as we were both restricted to purple Kata, I managed at least to keep up with him. Josh bowed in return and then stepped away for a moment, handing something to Ash, who stepped forward next, facing me. “Your reward for completing your test: your new belt, and a demonstration.”

We had saved my test for last since I was the only student eligible for advancement at that time, which also meant Josh would have the spotlight for the ‘demonstration’ portion. Unfortunately that also meant anyone who wanted to stick around would get to watch me next.

After tying my belt into place, I carefully folded my old one and offered it to Ash with a proud smile. “Thank you Sensei. Would you honor me by giving this to another student?”

“Robin, are you sure?” he asked. “I know you chose to pay for your belts yourself.”

I nodded. “Yes sir. I know not everyone can afford their gi or belts. Besides, I got a great discount for being the daughter of an instructor,” I added with a grin. He laughed at that.

“Okay, if you’re sure,” he replied. “Now, everyone, gather around for the final demonstrations,” he called, getting everyone’s attention. The myriad students all clustered in a semicircle around Josh and Ash. I tried to join them, but Josh caught my arm and grinned, as Ash set up the five boards.

“Board breaking is a useful tool to gauge one’s progress.” He paused to grin. “It’s also a great recruiting tool.”

A chorus of laughter erupted from the class.

“But at its heart, one must always remember that with strength comes responsibility. Because you can do something, doesn’t mean you always have to, but it also doesn’t mean you should be ashamed. As you know Josh completed his second degree testing last week. Whenever a student completes a belt requirement above Orange, it’s tradition to have them break a number of boards. Can anyone tell me what this represents?”

The students looked at each other and murmured quietly, but no one spoke: at least, not at first. Finally someone asked, “Because it looks so cool?”

Again, a chorus of giggles erupted. Even Ash chuckled. “Not quite. No, the breaking of boards represents you as students, breaking through the challenges set before you. It takes strength, concentration, and precision to make a clean break. These same principles apply to your studies here, and to life.

“Purple belt requirement for example,” he continued, glancing at me now, “Is more than simply the Kata that you learn. You must also demonstrate concentration, coordination, perseverance, precision and timing, and mental discipline. You must be willing to work and to listen, to focus not just on the lesson, but on the meaning behind the lesson. As you progress, the color of your belt means less about what you can do, than about what you’ve learned.”

He turned to Josh and nodded.

“Breaking a single board requires all those things. That’s why we reserve its instruction for Purple and above. You must be able to focus and clear your mind. You must strike with precision, and you must have the coordination and strength to strike repeatedly, but you must also have the foresight, the mental discipline, to recognize where to strike.”

He inhaled, slowly exhaling. Three times, he lowered his closed fist over the same section of the topmost board. On the fourth swing, he let out a mighty shout, and all five boards snapped cleanly. The class erupted in cheers as he bowed to Ash, and then to me, as Ash set up a single board.

“Remember, precision, discipline, focus.” He winked at me, and I nodded and stepped forward.

I stared at the board for a second or two and reflected on what they had both just said. I raised my hand, and set it on the board, feeling the grain beneath my open palm.

“Do you feel the grain beneath your hand?” Ash asked. I nodded, and he continued. “If you fight the grain, you have an uphill battle. Strike with the grain and the board will do half your work for you.”

I raised my hand and closed my fist. I knew where I thought the best spot to strike would be, but I measured it up a couple of times just to be sure. On the third, I brought my fist down with as much force as I could muster. To my surprise, the board shattered cleanly. It definitely hurt a little, but not as much as I expected.

‘Wow!” one student cheered.

“Nice!” called another advanced student.

As they dispersed, Nikki and Allison raced over. Nikki threw her arms around me and giggled. “Robin that was awesome! Did it hurt?”

I giggled and hugged her back. “A little, yeah, but not bad.”

“I keep rebreakable boards on-hand,” Ash commented, “for my advanced students that are interested in practicing. You can develop conditioning that way or against a punching bag.”

“I’d like that,” I answered. “It feels amazing. It’s quite a rush, even with the board doing half the work.”

Ash laughed. “Don’t diminish your own accomplishment though. It still requires proper stance and focus. Oh, are you staying at your sister’s this weekend?”

I nodded. “With school starting Monday, we’re going to be sleeping over at Allison’s. It’s sort of a tradition to pig out on junk food and watch bad horror movies, then pass out around midnight. Plus I’m giving Ally a ride while Nikki continues her search for ‘the car that speaks to her’,” I added, grinning at Nikki.

She giggled. “Hey, matching the right car to the right personality is a fine art. Plus Ally wants to learn to drive stick, so there’s transmission to think about,” she added with a grin.

After I changed back into my street clothes, I walked with Nikki out to her car. “You know, I’m really excited about tomorrow now.”

“About going down to the shooting range?” Nikki asked as she sat. I nodded.

“Yeah. Did you see the look on her face when I said yes?” I giggled. “I imagine she gets the same rush from it that I did tonight breaking that board.”

“Or that one time I filled in for Moira,” Nikki admitted, adding, “Except for the part where I almost got sick all over a security guy on the way to the stage.” She giggled. “But I’m excited too. I haven’t seen Ally this happy in awhile.”

“I think we’re all finally approaching ‘normal’,” I answered and squeezed her hand. “So, where to?”

“Oh, I thought we’d celebrate before I took you home. Milkshakes, on me?”

“Sounds great,” I replied and leaned over to kiss her. “I love you.”

She grinned. “Love you more!” she shot back.

---

Author's Note:
Some of you might have noticed that Becoming Robin is officially caught up her eon TopShelf. I've been having trouble getting any writing done lately due to massive sleep problems, and an oppressive heat wave that's only just broken today.

That doesn't mean I'm not working on anything though. I should have something new up on Robinverse in the next day or three :-)

~Zoe