Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 1668

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The Daily Dormouse.
(aka Bike)
Part 1668
by Angharad

Copyright © 2012 Angharad
All Rights Reserved.
  
-Dormouse-001.jpg

I did wander downstairs about nine o’clock, the girls were in bed, because them coming in to wish me a goodnight, woke me up. I needed a wee anyway, and went downstairs for a cuppa. My face was still bruised and swollen but the pain had gone. I looked a right sight.

“How d’you feel?” asked Stella when she saw me.

“I don’t really know, angry, frustrated, tired plus probably half a dozen other feelings too vague to describe.”

“Sounds like shock to me.”

“Could be, I can’t understand how I let a gang of kids block me so the two muggers could try to rob me.”

“Why didn’t you just give ’em your bag?”

“It had all my cards in it.”

“So? They can be cancelled by a phone call.”

“Plus my phone.”

That’s insured, if I know Simon.”

“And some personal stuff.”

“What could be so precious that you risked being stabbed to death for?”

“A photo of Billie, I couldn’t stand the thought of her being violated by some bastard going through my purse.”

“Oh,” was all she said. “Want a cuppa?”

“I’d love a cup of tea.”

“Okay, I make you one–you know Simon hurt his hand, don’t you?”

“No–how would I know?”

“Yeah, he’s probably broken a metacarpal, Tom’s taken him to the hospital.”

“He didn’t half whack that first lout–hit him twice, blood and teeth everywhere.”

“As long as it wasn’t yours, I don’t really care.”

“Then he dropped the other guy with a Glasgow Nod.”

“What’s that when it’s at home–or should that be hame?”

“Aye, hen, it’s a heid butt.”

“Oh, a la Billy Connolly?”

“Yes, I suppose so, can’t remember where I heard the term. Dropped the big black kid, like he’d been pole-axed.”

“I think you’d better be less enthusiastic about the Battle of Waterloo to the police, they might end up doing Si for grievous bodily harm.”

“But we were the injured party. He saw the guy hitting me and the one had a knife. I screamed because there wasn’t much else I could do.”

“I’d have screamed in the beginning.”

“I didn’t have time, I know that sounds silly, but it’s true. It all happened so quickly and unexpectedly.”

“Yeah, I suppose it does.”

“They should arrest all those little swine because they were all either assisting the attempted robbery or impeding my escape.”

“Bet all they get is a slapped wrist.”

“I thought possession of a knife in such circumstances meant an automatic prison term.”

“I dunno, but the police phoned to say they’d send someone round tomorrow.” She handed me a mug of tea and then sat opposite with mine.

“Where’s Jacquie?”

“Up with Julie, they’re supposedly babysitting the little ones, but I think they were playing cards.”

“What did the children have to eat?”

I opened a couple of tins of beans and we all had beans on toast–given the circumstances, they made do.”

“Thanks, just as well I got that extra loaf the other day.”

“Yeah, without it they’d have had baked beans on baked beans.”

“Where’s Danny?”

“He went up to bed just before you came down, I think he’s reading something he can’t put down. ‘Boy Racer,’ or something.”

“That’s my Mark Cavendish book.”

“Tough,” she grinned.

“I’ll get it back later.”

A little later, as I was about to return to bed, Simon came back with his hand heavily strapped. “Ooh, that looks worse, Babes.”

“Thanks, darling, I love you too. How’s the hand?”

“Very badly bruised query hairline fracture–boxers apparently get it quite a lot.”

“I see, so a question of float like an elephant sting like a...”

“I’ll settle for hornet but a weaver fish might be better.”

“Si, the way you lambasted that kid, sting ray might be better, or even scorpion.”

“Anyway, I’m gonna tell the police I was so angry when I saw him advance upon you with the knife, I just lost it, and hit him.”

“It would be grossly unfair if they prosecuted you for defending your wife.”

“I’d have done it for anyone I saw being threatened with a knife, especially after your experience with that bike hating nut.”

“Better remind the police that you’ve seen me nearly die from stabbing once before. It might mitigate things for us.”

“It’s bloody absurd that I could be prosecuted more than them, seeing as they were the ones affecting an armed robbery.”

“Of course, once the knife came out it’s very different, isn’t it? Have you been talking to Jason?”

“How’d you guess?”

“Affecting an armed robbery–of course you talk like that all the time, don’t you?”

“Yeah, it’s banker speak, we get armed robbers all the time, like don’t we?” He spoke in a silly deep voice which made me smile.

We went to bed and he held me for a while until I went to sleep again. I could feel the coarseness of the strapping on my bare shoulder and shuddered, he got hurt saving me. I turned and kissed him.

“What’s that for?” he asked sleepily.

“Thank you for saving my life.”

“I thought I was saving my wife, actually,” he yawned and I cuddled back into him.

“I love you, Simon Cameron.”

“Yeah, whatever,” he yawned again, but still held on to me. In reality, I was too warm and I’m sure he was too, but I also felt a little scared and it was so reassuring to have him lying next to me.

I woke up at one point when I thought I heard a noise but it was nothing, possibly one of the kids going to the loo. I felt frightened for a short time, as Simon had turned over and was facing away from me, so I cuddled into his back and put my arm round his waist.

The next morning my face was black and blue and my eye was nearly closed. Trish offered to try and fix it, but seeing as we were seeing the police, I felt we needed all the help we could get in dealing with the police.

I’d just finished sorting the kids their breakfasts, when the doorbell rang and Jacquie went to answer it. “Mummy, it’s the police.”

“Okay, find out if they want tea or coffee and bring it through into the dining room, please, Jacquie.”

She nodded and went off to ask them, then came rushing back and put the kettle on. “He wants coffee and she wants tea.”

“Do me a tea as well, if you would.” I went off to show them into the dining room.

“God, I’ll bet that hurts, doesn’t it, Cathy?”

“PC Andy Bond, how nice to see you–out of the one eye at any rate.”

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Comments

Thank you Angharad,

Black and bruised eyes are a life hazard for some men,
but not nice for women,especially when a so called man
is responsible for it.I thought a head butt was a
"Liverpool Kiss",but typically Glaswegian,aye!

ALISON

Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 1668

I can easily see that young Jacquie is becoming a great older sister to the warren.

    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine

A warren?

I didn't realize the Camerons were rabbits,I thought they were Scots!
Silly old me :).

ALISON

Wouldn't be surprised.

Wouldn't be surprised if they considered charging both Angie and Simon.

Neighbour of mine went to the assistance of an old lady being mugged in the underpass under the M4 in Pt Talbot and he got done for assault because the gang called the police first on their mobile phones and claimed he'd attacked them. When it went to court the jury threw it out because the old lady finally came forward to give evidence. It transpired she'd been mugged twice before and burgled so many times she was too scared to give evidence at first. The gang knew she was old, frail and lived alone. It was resolved eventually because two of the gang were caught coming out of the house a couple of weeks later by a bunch of lads who'd been playing football.

The boys all knew these thugs so they simply videoed on their mobiles then called the police cos' they knew the score. Boys were caught with her last credit card in their possession. It took that, and the evidence of about six of the football team to get a conviction. They're back out now after less than four months in prison despite terrorising the old lady.

The law's gone stupid in the UK. We should have more prisons and longer sentences. Though I DON'T agree with the death penalty.

bev_1.jpg

Prisons

We do need lots more prisons - especially as successive governments keep inventing new offences which are imprisonable (e.g. ordinary people not paying enough tax, or four years for unsuccessfully attempting to incite a riot) while doing b*gg*r all about prison capacity. Result: overcrowded prisons, cancelled rehabilitation / work programme schemes and increasingly early parole (with some offenders let out after serving only 1/3 their sentence), resulting in the proverbial "revolving door" (i.e. offender released from prison, quickly commits another crime, and within a few months is back inside).

Of course, it'll never happen, as building new prisons is tantamount to admitting the criminal justice system has failed, added onto which prisons have a staggeringly high NIMBY factor.


As the right side of the brain controls the left side of the body, then only left-handers are in their right mind!

At least they got Andy Bond

More common sense than most of his senior officers.

I've heard a head butt to the nose referred to as a 'Scottish Kiss' before now. It reminds me of the old joke, "What's the difference between the Italian Mafia and the Glasgow Mafia? The Italian Mafia make you an offer you can't refuse; the Glasgow Mafia make you an offer you can't understand."

S.

I got the best

laugh of the day from this one. Thanks.

Nice to see...

Nice to see a familiar face... Been a while since PC Bond has stopped by. He must have been expecting something when he arrived. Wonder what he'll think about Cathy's appearance.

Thanks for more. Glad to hear Jacquie and Julie were getting along fine (Cards SOUNDS that way... But, who knows...)

Annette

Further Complications?

Okay, let me say right up front, that I am not hoping for this, or maybe... am hoping not for this, which is less grammatically correct but places the right emphasis on it.

All this chatter about Simon getting done up for assaulting the assailant is more than a bit of foreshadowing, so I asked myself, "Pippa, how could Ang really follow through and exploit that foreshadowing, or worse yet, make it even worse?" The answer was simple. The mugger whose face Simon destroyed, dies.

Frankly, it's not a story line I would enjoy, although it's quite dramatic, but I could see Ang tormenting the heck out of it, and us in the process.

Don't die, stinking chav mugger! I don't want to have to read 7 nail-biting courtroom drama episodes.

___________________
Why can't things stay relatively calm for any length of time?

If she does this...

If she pulls that story line, we all know who to blame for encouraging her!

Personally, I'm hoping it goes in another direction... But, also hoping it doesn't turn out Simon's hurt worse than he thought from the head but... That old ruggers head injury... They say that subsequent "bops" do more damage than the original one, you know... He could have a very slow bleed going in his head.

So many really scary ways this story could turn... Heck, the "friends" of the muggers (or even some others who want to show they're better) could wait for Cathy to be in public again and ambush her...

A worried,
Annette