When Sarah awoke the next morning, she found a large, black tin case lying on her nightstand, tied with a pink ribbon. A small note lay folded neatly, tucked up under the ribbon, and Sarah carefully pulled it away as she sat up, rubbing her eyes with her free hand. The letter was hand written in a very elegant scrawl, most probably Katelyn’s judging by the dark purple ink.

“Sarah, I bought this for you while we were out shopping yesterday after you mentioned you dabbled in drawing. I had no idea how good you really were. These are Faber Castell Polychromos pencils - a full 120 set. I took the liberty of printing off some artistry tips specific to this brand and type. I hope you don’t mind too much. I just wanted to help.”

Sarah chuckled to herself, glancing at the case before returning her gaze to the letter and continuing to read.

“Needless to say I had no idea how you got your first sketchpad until after I bought these. It made me realize just how incredible an artist you really are, that you can take something scrounged and make something so beautiful. I was going to save these for your birthday, but I thought you would get more use out of them on your trip back to Arkansas. All my love, Katelyn.”

It took all she had not to burst into tears. She carefully picked up the large tin case, hugging it to her chest. Margaret appeared in the doorway and smiled softly. “I see you found your gift. I found that shoved through the mail slot this morning. Judging by the ribbon I figured it would be for you.”

Sarah nodded slowly. “I’m taking these with me so I can work on my drawing on the flight down. She says they’re polychromos.” Sarah laughed. “I was happy to get my hands on a half-decent, half-used charcoal pencil until now.”

Margaret smiled as she approached, sitting beside Sarah and pulling her into a hug. “Whatever you’re thinking, sweetheart, I want you to know that you deserve such a beautiful gift. Katelyn obviously cares about you a great deal. Spending money is her way of showing it.”

“I know,” Sarah answered, smiling back at her mother. “And I appreciate it. I really do. I just wish... I wish I could do something for her too.”

“It seems to me,” Margaret replied, “That the answer is staring you right in the face already. The best thing you can do for her is to put your talents to use. I’ve never been talented at anything in my life, and your father’s idea of “art” was a stuffed, singing fish on a wall.”

Sarah giggled at her mother’s remark. “Dad did love that stupid fish. I didn’t shed a tear when Ricky got pissed and beat it to death with a baseball bat.”

“The point is, dear, I don’t know where you got your gift, but I’m very proud of you, and I think you should use your talents to their fullest to help you cope with your feelings. It’s just something to think about,” she added, kissing her forehead. “I’m going to go start breakfast while you finish packing.”

“Thanks Momma,” Sarah answered, leaning into her. “I love you.”

Margaret, stunned silent for a second or two, just held Sarah close, fighting tears as she whispered, “I love you too.”

“Can you help me with my hair after breakfast? Ashleigh says I need to draw on my resources to learn more about how to be a girl, and, well, you’ve been one your whole life.”

Margaret laughed quite warmly at Sarah’s comment, kissing her forehead. “Sarah honey, you’ve been a girl all your life, too. It’s just taken me until these last few days to really start to realize it, to see what your friend Christina, Zoey, Ashleigh have all seen in the first place. But yes, of course I’ll help you.”

Margaret left Sarah to her own devices, and Sarah rose from her bed, padding over to the closet. “What to wear, what to wear...” Almost instinctively she pulled down the Princess t-shirt first. “Well this fits really well. Hm,” she hummed idly. she started to take down a pair of neatly folded jeans from the shelf above the clothing rack, but paused. She smiled to herself, grabbing the pink skirt that went with the top, as well as the shoes from their large shoe rack near the back.

She giggled, practically skipping out.

Although she probably could have just as easily slept the entire trip, for how comfortable first class seating was, Sarah worked carefully on her latest sketch at every free moment. By the time they landed in Little Rock she had only just finished the rough details of the background.

It felt truly bizarre, returning to the sleepy little Arkansas town Sarah had called ‘home’, if just barely, for the last year. It wasn’t tiny by any stretch, and it was close enough to Little Rock to not feel as though it were in the middle of nowhere, but with old memories flooding back, Sarah certainly felt isolated, staring out the window of the rental car. Ashleigh must have arranged it because Sarah knew her mother would never rent such an expensive luxury car.

“So where to first - the old apartment, or Christina’s?”

“Christina’s,” Sarah answered excitedly. “Maybe she can come with us back to the apartment even. There’s so much to catch up on.”

“That’s not a bad idea,” Margaret replied.

Sarah smiled thoughtfully. “I’d also like to go see my old dance instructor if that’s okay. I never got to really say goodbye to her. I mean it all happened so fast.” Sarah grunted, lightly rubbing her chest.

“It’s not polite to do that in public,” Margaret admonished. Sarah blinked at her.

“What are you talkin’ about? They’re hurting,” she whined. “And kinda itchy too.”

“You did wear a bra didn’t you?”

“Yeah, one of those padded ones Katelyn bought me.”

“It’s just something you have to live with. Eventually it’ll get better.”

“What exactly is ‘it’? It’s not contagious is it?” Sarah asked cautiously. Margaret stifled a giggle, smiling.

“Your hormones are taking effect, sweetheart. You won’t start to notice growth for awhile, but that sensation you’re feeling is the first sign that you’re growing into a young woman.”

“Wow, really?” Sarah perked up. “I really should’ve gotten the girls’ talk in health class. I hate being a boy.”

Margaret guarded her inner emotions, smiling politely for Sarah’s sake. It wasn’t yet time to mention what she and Ashleigh had discussed after Sarah had gone to bed, about the dark nature of her drawings, how fragile her ego really was. She had a long road ahead of her.

Across the road from Christina’s house, Emily and CJ stood dressed in short shorts and tank tops. Emily had a bucket in-hand, while CJ used the water hose to wash down Emily’s car. They waved politely when Sarah stepped out of the car, and seemed to be questioning each other about who the strange girl visiting Christina might be. Finally Emily set the bucket down, her aqua blue flip flops clapping loudly as she crossed the road, waving.

“Hey. If you’re looking for Chris or her family, they left about an hour ago. They’ll probably be back soon if you want to hang around though.” She paused as Margaret stepped out of the driver’s side. “Margaret?! Hey!” she squealed. “But where’s... Oh my God.”

“Hi Emily,” Sarah giggled.

“Sarah, holy sh-I mean, wow. You look great!”

“SARAH?!” CJ echoed, dropping the water hose and racing over. “Damn girl, what happened to you? You leave us to stay with your sister and come back all girly and cute.”

“It’s a long story. I made a few new friends who are hell-bent on breaking me out of my ‘awkward tomboy’ phase,” she made sure to finger quote that, causing Emily and CJ to cackle and hug her.

“We talked about that,” Emily advised, “But we were afraid of pushing you too far too fast. You really do look beautiful Sarah. I LOVE your hair.”

“Thanks. It’s just a basic perm, plus she trimmed my split ends and shaped it.”

“It’s cute,” CJ added. “And that top is adorable. Where’d you get it?”

“At a department store in the Alpine Springs mall. Skirt too. It started out as a joke, they pressured me into trying this outfit on, but none of us, least of all me, expected it to look this good.”

“No kidding. Pink is really your color, especially with your hair and eyes. Oh hey, there comes Chris and her folks!”

“Oh shit, hide me! I want to scare the living shit out of Chris!” Sarah giggled.

“Language,” Margaret advised, but smiled, motioning to the back of the car. “Back here. I’ll stand in front like I just got out of the vehicle.”

As Abigail’s familiar SUV rolled into the driveway, Christina stepped out first, racing over to hug Margaret. “Hey! What’s going on? I thought you were taking Sarah to live in New Haven for awhile or something?”

“Hello dear,” Margaret answered warmly as she accepted Christina’s hug. “Some things came up, and now we have a house in Alpine Springs, but we needed to come back for a few things, and to close out the old apartment, turn back the key and such.”

“I guess Sarah couldn’t make it?” Christina asked hesitantly. “I can’t blame her though after what she went through.”

Emily and CJ started to giggle as Christina turned to walk inside. Sarah slowly crept around the car and up behind her, throwing her arms around her and causing Christina to squeal.

“Oh my God!” She stared, slack-jawed at Sarah, and squealed even louder. “Oh my GOD! What are you wearing? And your hair and... Oh my God!” She actually bounced. Much to Sarah’s dismay, she found herself bouncing too. The two giggled and hugged and cried at once.

“It is so good to see you face to face again,” Sarah cheered, hugging her again. “Stuff’s happening pretty fast back in Alpine Springs, but it’s just not the same without you and Emily and CJ around.”

“Aw,” Christina giggled. “We missed you too.” She paused, starting to blush just a little. “Um, Sarah, there’s something I need to tell you, since you’re going back anyway, right?”

Sarah gave Christina a sidelong glance. “Chris, what is it?”

“Um, it’s just that, well you just suddenly left, and Max, well,”

“Oh crap. I forgot about Max. I mean we’ve stayed in touch but I forgot I promised him a date.”

“Yeah. Um, we’re … We’re kind of dating. I-mean-it’s-not-serious-but,” Christina tried to explain, but Sarah’s vapid giggle caused her to stop and stare. “W-what? What’s so funny?”

Sarah answered, still giggling, “Well I kinda have a girlfriend now.”

“Oh my Gawd,” Christina giggled. “No way!”

“Her name’s Katelyn. She’s sixteen.”

“Holy shit, Sarah,” Emily blurted, getting a giggle out of CJ for her trouble.

“Damn girl.”

“Hush you two!” Sarah teased. “It wasn’t like either of us meant for it to happen. We just kind of found each other. She’s really great once you get to know her. Plus she doesn’t let anyone mess with me. This one chick at the pizza place tried to start something? But Katelyn twisted her arm, pinned her against the wall, and made her apologize and swear to never do it again before literally throwing her out. The staff were all cheering when she came back in.”

“Oh my Gawd,” Christina repeated, giggling. “So how long are you in town?”

“Not very. We’re just going to bounce over to the apartment and sort through some old things, turn back the apartment and stuff. You guys wanna come with?”

“CJ and I’ll meet you there. We just need to rinse off my car so we won’t be too long.”

“I’ll come,” Christina added, nodding, “If it’s okay with Mom?” she asked, turning to her mother.

“I don’t see why not, with Emily there to give you a ride home.”

“Yay!” the girls cheered in unison as Sarah practically leapt into the front seat.

“What in the … Zoey,” Margaret practically groaned at the large moving van parked in front of their old apartment building. Sarah giggled.

“Well you gotta give her credit. She’s efficient.”

“Efficient isn’t the problem sweetie.”

Sarah couldn’t really decide what to make of that comment, so she left it alone. “There’s not much I want to keep,” Sarah stated simply as they entered the second of two floors apartment building. “My old clothes can go do Goodwill because I won’t be needing them anymore.”

Christina giggled, squeezing Sarah’s arm lightly. “I’m really happy for you Sarah. I’m going to miss having you around here, but there’s no reason we can’t stay in touch.”

“Totally,” Sarah answered with a smile. “And you can come visit any time you want. First class plane tickets can’t cost that much.”

Margaret cleared her throat. “When you’re finished with your room, Sarah, dear, would you mind helping me?”

“We can help right now,” Sarah answered. “Really the only stuff I want to keep is already in a box.” Sarah shrugged, giggling as she and Christina followed Margaret into the bedroom.

“I need to get the rest of my clothes,” Margaret sighed. “And photo albums.”

“Any of Dad?” Sarah asked innocently as Margaret knelt beside her worn out old bed. She paused to glance up at Sarah again.

“You were too young to remember, I suppose. Your father hated cameras. He once tried to punch the local newspaper photographer after the poor man snapped a picture of us at the county fair together.”

“Jeeze,” Christina groaned, quickly covering her mouth. Sarah giggled.

“I’m with Chris on this one,” she mused, pulling open the closet. The few shelves inside were mostly empty, except for one lone, battered old shoe box. “Hey, what’s in here?” she asked as she took it down and opened it without waiting for a reply. At first it just looked to her like a bunch of crumpled up old newspapers.

Margaret paused, looking up from a very old photo album. She smiled softly as she realized what Sarah had found. “Look further inside,” she urged gently. Christina leaned closer as Sarah brushed the newspaper aside.

A tiny, golden ceramic edge peeked through. Sarah nearly dropped the box in shock, tearing the paper aside. A little miniature ceramic unicorn, its delicate, hand-painted face as well-preserved as the day it was made, seemed to smile back at her.

“O-Oh my God,” Sarah whispered, her eyes filling with tears. Christina reached out to steady her friend. “Momma, y-you did this? This is why I could never find the rest of them?”

Margaret slowly approached, pulling Sarah into a hug. “Some of those, your grandmother left for you, some you bought with your own money, and some Chris gave you. Honey, I couldn’t let you throw away those memories, so I stole them away and hid them. I guess I hoped one day, after I was gone, you’d be going through my things and find them.”

“Oh, Momma,” Sarah carefully set the box aside and rushed closer, throwing her arms around Margaret. She sniffed, smiling up at her. “I love you.”

“I love you too honey,” Margaret whispered, kissing Sarah’s forehead. “Now,” she continued, laughing to herself to spite her sobs. “Let’s finish up here. Zoey wants to see you before we leave after all.”

“You’re not mad at her?” Sarah asked cautiously.

“Oh, sweetheart, of course I’m not bad. Just...” she paused to sigh. “Just a proud old fool.”

As if on cue, Emily and CJ appeared in the doorway. “Hey,” Emily called, “The door was unlocked so we let ourselves in. Oh wow, cute unicorns,” she added.

“Thanks. I used to collect em when I was little. Mom saved most of em,” Sarah answered, smiling proudly up at Margaret.

Back in Alpine Springs the next day, Sarah had just called to invite Em and Beth over. Katelyn’s piano lessons unfortunately prevented her from coming over as well, but Sarah resolved to have fun anyway, and not let having to say goodbye to Christina for another couple of weeks get her down.

“Hurry up,”

“Sarah!” the twins giggled excitedly. Sarah promised to show off her new swimsuit in honor of getting her new pool cleaned and prepped for human use again. She never dared look under the cover before at what might have been growing. The pool cleaners had come and gone while they were away, which suited her just fine.

“Hang on, I’m coming,” Sarah huffed. “I just need to, you know, mentally prepare.” She could hear the girls giggle from the other side of the bathroom door at that remark, as she stared at herself in the mirror. She couldn’t even tell she wasn’t a natural, if somewhat undeveloped girl. Katelyn’s advice on the lime green bikini had been spot on. It fit comfortably while allowing her to pass as a girl, but there was no way she’d wear it at the public pool.

“Okay, promise not to laugh,” Sarah called.

“We promise!” the girls chimed in unison. They squealed as Sarah opened the door.

“Oh my God!” Beth started.

“You look so cute!” Em finished.

“Thanks,” Sarah blushed. “Come on, let’s go cool off in the pool. Mom made fresh lemonade. You know, the kind with real lemons,” she teased, deflecting any further comments about her swimsuit in the process.

The three lounged around the pool, swimming, playing water tag, and just relaxing in general before coming back inside to cool off under the climate-controlled living room. Sarah seemed to have really opened up to them since coming home, moreso than before. She didn’t even complain about the twin talk.

Around noon Em mumbled, “Man, I’m hungry.”

“Me too,” Beth and Sarah answered in unison, causing the pair to stop and stare blankly at each other. All three started laughing.

“Hey, let’s go to the pizza place? I mean it should be a dipshit free zone since Katelyn laid down the law, plus it’s not too far to ride our bikes. Sarah you have a bike don’t you?”

“I have a cruddy old bike, yeah,” she answered. “I’ve been meaning to buy a new one. Maybe you guys can help me pick one out some time?”

“We’d love to!” the twins answered. Sarah smiled. “Cool. I’ll just go change.”

“We’ll grab our shorts,” Em answered as Sarah raced upstairs.

Truth be told she didn’t really want to change. She felt incredibly girly and liked it, but she didn’t want to be seen in public dressed like that, so she grabbed a floral print sundress and threw it over her head, sliding her feet into a pair of flat sandals and bounding back downstairs.

She grabbed her purse, taking out her phone as she walked out to the garage to get her bike. “Hi Momma, just leaving you a voicemail to let you know me, Em and Beth are going out for pizza. We’ll be back in maybe thirty minutes or so.”

Sarah pulled out her faded blue bike, but blushed as she watched the twins climb onto their matched dark red ones.

“You don’t have a helmet?” Em asked, concerned. Sarah shook her head.

“Never cared about one before. I’ll be careful though. We can get one when we go bike shopping.”

“Yay,” Em cheered. Beth giggled.

“There’s a little bike shop on the way. If you don’t want to get a new bike today we at least need to get you some pads and a helmet,” she advised. Em nodded.

“Yeah. You’ll mess up more than your hair without one.”

After an impromptu bike safety gear shopping excursion the girls arrived at the town’s old-fashioned pizza parlor. They chained their bikes and raced inside. Sarah pulled off her new, shiny pink helmet and dangled it lazily in her hand as they approached to order.

“We’ll have-”

“The usual,” the girls began, turning to Sarah. She shrugged. “Anything but mushrooms is fine with me. Oh um, and a Dr. Pepper to drink.”

The woman behind the counter smiled cheerfully. “It’ll be right out. Your girlfriend’s not with you today?” she asked seriously, glancing at Sarah. She blushed a little as she shook her head.

“She had piano lessons to teach this morning then her singing lessons to get to, so it’s just us three today.”

“Well, if anybody gives you trouble, Big Mike in back will deal with them.” She grinned, glancing back toward the back where a very large, very scary man with long hair tucked up into a hair net turned, smiled, and waved before shoveling a huge pizza into a coal-fired oven.

Em and Beth giggled as the three turned to find themselves a table.

“So how’s your helmet fit?” Em asked.

Sarah stared blankly back at her. “Um, the same as it did in the shop?”

Em giggled. “Yeah, I figured, but I couldn’t think of anything else to talk about.”
Beth snickered. “I heard it’s shark week on Discovery again.”

Em groaned. “Again?”

Sarah rolled her eyes. “I have to pee. I’ll be back in a minute.”

“Okay,” the two answered in unison. Beth glanced at Em. “Should one of us go with her?”

“I’m sure she’ll be fine. You heard what the lady said about the big dude in back,” Em responded as Sarah disappeared out of earshot, into the apparently empty ladies’ bathroom. She glanced at herself in the mirror, giving herself only a brief checkup on her way to the far stall.

She had no sooner sat down when she heard the sound of two other stall doors opening. They sounded like two teenage girls, probably Katelyn’s age, gossiping about this and that. Sarah ignored it for the most part until...

“So did you hear about Katelyn’s new girlfriend?”

“The trans... trans...”

“Transexual, yeah. I feel sorry for her.”

“For Katelyn?” the first asked, surprised.

“No, the other girl. For Sarah. Can you imagine living with that kind of shit she went through, and never being a real girl? Fuck, if I had been born with a guy’s body I’d probably kill myself.”

“No kidding,” the other girl said softly. “I’d kind of like to meet her. I heard she’s kind of pretty, especially, you know, given the circumstances.”

“Yeah, she’s only like thirteen though. There’s a serious age issue there, but whatever floats their boats. C’mon, let’s go see if our pizza’s there yet.”

Sarah waited until she heard the bathroom door close. She quietly flushed the toilet and walked back out into the main bathroom. She stopped at the mirror, staring intensely at herself.

“Not a real girl?” she asked her reflection. “Am I really just a boy in a dress?”

She sighed as she slowly turned to leave. Their pizza sat waiting at the table, though Em and Beth hadn’t actually taken a slice for themselves yet. Em smiled.

“We wanted you to have first pick,” she giggled. Beth nodded, but paused.

“Sarah? What’s wrong?”

Sarah shrugged lightly as she sat down and forced a smile. “Nothing. Wow this looks better than the last one,” she added, trying to change the subject.

“Well, if you’re sure,” she answered hesitantly.

“I’m sure,” Sarah replied, despite the mouthful of pizza.