Bound to Serve the Dark: 2/8

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Bound to Serve the Dark: 2 of 8
by:
Lilith Langtree


Darkness is a friend, an ally. It allows us to be honest with ourselves, to express those values that we would disavow in the light. The light blinds us. It is only in the dark that we see clearly, and there is a great dark hidden among these worlds.

Author's Note: Since villains are mostly portrayed in two dimensions, I thought it might be nice to have one fleshed out for your reading pleasure. This is a villain's story. It does not have a happy ending. The main character is not going to be a fluffy person, but I won't be overly gross or cruel with his/her portrayal. It's just meant to show how an average person can become evil with a little push in the wrong direction. Kudos to djkauf for betaing this for me. Pic Credit: Found at Comicvine. I think Darth Hell created it. Star Wars and recognizable characters from that universe belong to George Lucas et al. The lessons quotes are also property of Lucas.

Chapter Two

As I said before, there was no hiding my changes, so I didn’t bother. Instead, I signed a few things the doctor brought back, dressed in the provided medical scrubs, and left the hospital with my head held relatively high.

No, I wasn’t trying to show off. In fact, I was embarrassed as hell, but with red skin came the fantastic inability to blush. Avoiding the looks I was getting was a little harder. Being trapped in an elevator with a seven or eight year old kid and his grandmother was worse.

“Are you going to a costume party?” he asked.

“No.”

“Twi’lek aren’t supposed to have those black marks.”

“The evil ones do.”

That pretty much shut him up for the remaining three floors. Sorry, I wasn’t really in the mood. Having acquired a doctorate in Evil over the course of a few days has an effect on a person, you know?

Good as her word, my mother was waiting for me at the front of the hospital. When I slid into the passenger side, I had a bitch of a time with my lekku, the seat, and the seatbelt. It hurts to sit down and lean back on those things; they’re sensitive.

By the time I’d arranged myself, my mother came out of the suggestion I put her under.

“Why are we out here?”

“We’re going shopping. I need new clothes, remember?”

“Oh.” She sounded lost.

I frowned at what I did to her in the hospital, but I needed her to not put up a fight. I’d swear not to do it again, but I seriously didn’t know if I could hold to that promise; not at the moment anyway.

My mother looked like she was trying to think of something, but couldn’t quite put her finger to the problem.

“Mom, is there somewhere we can shop that isn’t too busy?”

“It’s Wednesday, honey, the mall will be open soon and it’s never busy until lunchtime.”

I nodded. “That’ll do.”

While we drove about five miles to the mall, I thought about what I could wear that would give me the freedom of movement that I knew I needed and that would be somewhat normal. I wasn’t the best with color coordination, but I thought I knew what I wanted.

There was no way I was wearing just a bra and a loin cloth, no matter what the fuzzy-faced man thought looked good on Twi’lek. He was overweight and he was a geek, of course he was a perv where hot girls were concerned. They go hand in hand.

Yeah, I noticed I said I was hot in an offhanded kind of way, even though I called myself a freak not twenty minutes before. I’m confused.

Sure, I thought Twi’leks were eye candy and I admit having more than a couple of quick fantasies of bedding one. I was sixteen and male; perverted fantasies are almost a requirement.

Needless to say, I had a picture in my head of the ideal utilitarian clothing, for a Twi’lek to wear, but I had no idea what any of it was called in girl-speak.

When we got out of the car, she led me inside and I described what I needed in as few words as possible, then we went to the closest sports store. I received a few stares along the way, and one guy actually stopped dead in his tracks with an open mouth.

They’re called sports tights; at least that’s what the salesman said after I used my Sith Mind Trick on him so he wouldn’t gawk at me. After that he was very helpful. I got several pair in navy, gray, and black. I wasn’t so sure about the gray, but my mother said it went with red well enough.

The tops were a different matter. Most of the workout stuff was closed-necked, and I have a rather big head now. It really wasn’t worth the aggravation, so I chose a few tanks and a few jackets that closed with a zipper. A few sports bras, cross-trainers, and socks later and I was able to leave with enough clothes to get me by.

I could always send my mother out for more now that she knew my sizes. Women liked shopping anyway, right? Maybe it would get her mind off of things and I needed the privacy for what I had to do.

When we got home, my father was there, looking decidedly surprised at my new appearance.

“You’re a Twi’lek.”

I could see him fighting with himself over his hatred for anything Star Wars and his love for his son who was now his daughter.

“Dad, think about it this way. You can sue the fuzzy-faced guy and actually have proof that the whole idea was yours.”

All this was said in the course of about five seconds, or the time it takes to move from the front door to the hallway leading to my room. I really didn’t want to have my father stare at me while I tried to explain everything. I had more important things to take care of.

That didn’t stop my father from following me and placing his foot in the way of the door closing.

“What do you mean, proof?”

I hope God forgives me for all the bad things I’m doing until I can get my head sorted out.

Turning around I stared at him with as much intensity as I could. “Go shopping with Mom. I need new clothes and she’ll need help with everything. You’ll have a great time doing it, too.”

His mouth went slack and he blinked. “I’m going shopping with your mom. We’re going to have a great time.”

“Thanks, Dad.”

Was it evil to basically control your parent’s minds? Probably, but it was for the greater good. I mean which would you rather have: a little mind control which wasn’t harmful to them and would keep them safe for a few hours, or an evil dictator that wouldn’t think twice about sacrificing anyone at a whim and had the knowledge to destroy the Earth in her head?

I thought so. All you need is a good rationalization to keep you going throughout the day.

I dropped my backpack to the side and my bags beside the bed before going routing around in my closet for the items that I brought up from the basement.

See, the pyramids and that multi-sided thing are what are called holocrons. Jedi and Sith use them as training tools. It’s kind of like interactive Wikipedia, a drill instructor, and a teacher all in one. Every Master puts their cognitive essence in the thing and then apprentices or other masters can learn about them and the things they did.

Usually, it’s one holocron per customer. Not that it wouldn’t hold more information than one person could provide — the things could store terabytes… what’s bigger than a terabyte? — but it was tradition to do it this way.

Darth Talon’s holocron was different from the others.

One is supposed to use the Force to access the thing, like you would an encrypted computer. If you could use the Force properly then you could access it.

Her holocron accessed me. I could tell you why, but then I’d have to kill you. That particular bit of knowledge doesn’t leave my head under any circumstances. It’s that volatile. No Sith or Jedi Master had ever accomplished this feat, and the ramifications of the success were mind-blowing, literally. If any other Jedi knew what had happened to me then I’d be killed. If the Sith knew then I’d be tortured for the information and then killed.

Oh, here I am talking about Star Wars like it was real. Here’s the thing; it was, and I’m about to find out how and why the holocrons were down in my basement, walled up for nobody to find until it collapsed.

After finding the bag with the holocrons, I picked the multi-sided one and left the rest. I had no desire to learn any more about the Sith. I needed help from the Jedi.

It was a dodecahedral — that means twelve-sided — polygon. The metal appeared gold in color along with the clear plastic/glass material that I knew to be transparisteel — looks and feels like plastic, but is as hard as steel, in case you were wondering — but there was one thing that made this one different than the Sith holocrons, well, two things really. One, it was of Jedi origin and didn’t make me feel nauseous when I looked at it. Two, it wasn’t just any Jedi holocron; it was the Great Holocron.

No, it wasn’t all that great, like Super-Holocron with the flowing red cape and the big red S on its chest. It was a collective resource that had many thousands if not hundreds of thousands of entries from any number of Jedi. A fair comparison would be a central database where general information could be stored. What it was doing in my possession, I had no idea.

First things first, though. Deal with evil then explain everything later.

I locked my door and set the GH on the bed, kicked off my shoes and assumed the position.

My dresser mirror stood at the foot of my bed and I saw the reflection.

I had almost forgotten — no, that’s not true — I had repressed that I was now a female alien from a blockbuster movie.

Shoving that re-realization back in its hole, I held my right hand out with its flat black Talon like fingernails — apt, huh? — and concentrated on awakening the Gatekeeper of the holocron. He’s kind of like the teacher/drill instructor that gives you the information. He’s interactive, remember.

After a few moments a gold glow escaped from the transparisteel and a small hologram appeared above the holocron in the shape of…

“Yoda.”

His green muppet lips bunched up in annoyance or disappointment, I couldn’t tell which.

“Darth Talon, access this holocron before, you tried. Permit you, I did not.”

My mouth worked out the shock of seeing the little Jedi Master standing there. “I’m not Darth Talon. My name’s Josh Walker.”

His bushy eyebrows rose, but he didn’t say anything else.

“Look around. Does this look like the lair of a Sith Lord?”

“Sith Lady, the correct term is.”

I shook my head in exasperation. “Whatever. Four days ago I was a sixteen year old guy I found Darth Talon’s holocron in my basement and it possessed me or something. It changed me to look like this. It turned me into a Sith. I know everything. You gotta help me change back and get control of this thing.”

It looked like he was pondering the situation. “Provide the holocron of Darth Talon, you will.”

“Can you not talk like that? It’s really annoying and I’m having trouble enough keeping my anger at bay.”

I got up off the bed and retrieved my backpack. When I pulled out the holocron, I set it on the bed next to the GH.

“I’ve got three more in my closet and a bunch of other stuff too.”

“Retrieve them, you will.”

I nearly growled at him ignoring my request. You’d think that an eight-hundred year old being could speak in standard English or Basic or whatever they spoke.

Once I had the bags beside the bed I started pulling everything out. When I saw them for a second time, I knew what everything was and how to operate it all.

A lot of the equipment was standard issue for a Jedi: an A-109 Aquata Breather, a beacon, a grappling spike launcher, a headset comlink, a utility belt, and yes, a lightsaber. There were two sets of these.

The one thing that caught my attention was a Holo-recorder.

I picked it up and looked at the controls while the Yoda-Gatekeeper was examining the Sith holocrons.

There was a library of listings in the recorder’s memory. What I was interested in was the last few entries.

~O~

Very very very long story short. After the death of his longtime lover, a guy by the name of Cade left the galaxy of his birth and entered an unstable wormhole that was collapsing behind him as he raced through. It popped out not too far away from the Sol system and he found Earth somewhere back in the early 1900’s.

His ship crashed and he took what he could and moved to the Houston area back when it hadn’t been around for more than fifty or sixty years. He’d built the house my family lived in and sealed away any evidence of his not being from Earth.

He couldn’t just throw away the holocrons that he stole from the original Darth Talon before he killed her in a lightsaber duel. He hid them instead and trusted his son and his son’s son after him to guard them.

There it was. Someone dropped the ball along the way. Judging from how my dad acts, I’d say he was the most likely suspect.

“Cade.”

I turned to look at the Yoda-Gatekeeper. “You knew him?”

“Mmm. A troubled mind, Cade had. Cared not for the life of a Jedi, did he.”

“I guess I’m his great-grandson or something close to that.”

“Granddaughter, perhaps.”

I rolled my eyes. “Whatever. So, look, can you help me? Since you knew my relatives, I mean?”

He placed his holo-hands inside his holo-robes. “Help you I will. Not for Cade. For his legacy. Powerful in the Force your family is. Great harm you can do if not taught as a Jedi.”

~O~

I spent the rest of the time my parents were gone trying to meditate the Jedi way. It differs from Sith. There’s a lot less anger involved, and way more navel staring. Considering I was sixteen, I wasn’t too successful.

“Practice you must.”

“I know. I’ll do that, but I’ve also got school and a life that my parents can’t ignore. I’ll do my best.”

I deactivated the GH and threw my blanket over everything a moment before my mother knocked on the door.

“We’re home.”

My eyes widened as I saw the massive amount of bags she was holding along with a confused but very happy father in tow.

We spent the better part of an hour sorting through everything while Dad fetched a few boxes and stored my male clothes. I told them not to throw them out because I had every intension of returning to my male body once I figured out how Talon changed me in the first place. Annoyingly enough, that wasn’t included in the training she forced into my head.

~O~

I wore a pair of sports tights and a funky black blouse that was very billowy and dropped down far enough to cover my butt. I wasn’t fond of the blouse, but I liked the Doc Martin’s knee boots. They were a pain to lace up utility boots that were just this side of looking combat style, but I figured I saved time washing and styling my hair in a tradeoff.

Now I just had to get over crying at the drop of a hat.

After everything was done, the night before, I lay in bed thinking about what had really happened to me. That brought on the water works.

As long as I could keep busy, I could compartmentalize the issue, but when I was just sitting there with nothing to do, it hit me, and hit me hard.

I still had to deal with the issue of school. There was no way in hell I was attending while looking like a Star Wars trailer. It would be chaos. I’d be the center of attention, and it wouldn’t be the good kind.

I could almost picture that scene. Being hit on by every sci-fi geek out there in one day isn’t exactly what I’d call fun. Then there would be the haters. You know who I’m talking about, don’t you?

You’ll have the homophobes that’ll think I did this on purpose. Then there will be the anti-meta crowd that think they are all that’s wrong with the world, if metas weren’t around then everything would be bubblegum and lollipops. Who else? Oh I know, how about the fan boys, not just the perverts. I’m talking about those that will inevitably ask me every Star Wars question under the sun.

You think I’m kidding. Well, then you have obviously never been to a sci-fi/comic convention where cosplay is involved. I’ve already seen a lot of the hate that would be directed my way. No thanks; not interested.

“Don’t you look nice this morning.”

Mom was seriously trying to act like this wasn’t freaking her out. It took a lot of effort to not remind her that I have tentacles popping out of my head and I was red to top the whole thing off. Nice wasn’t really a term I would use to describe me.

Instead of saying anything nasty, I gave her a subdued smile and sat down to pour myself a bowl of Honey Oats.

“Would you like me to go with you to school today to explain to your principal?”

My mouth dropped open. “You’re not serious.” I gave her a brief pause to see if she was going to laugh, but she didn’t. “You are. I’m not going to school looking like this.”

“Josh, you have to have an education. Even if I wanted to, which I don’t, I couldn’t allow you to miss so many days of school until you’re seventeen. It’s the law.”

Setting the box of cereal down, I looked at her. “I’ve only missed two days. And can’t you home school me or something?”

I was on the verge of whining, and with my new seductive honey-like voice it didn’t sound very good.

“When will it end, sweetie? How about after high school? Will you stay in this house forever?”

My shoulders dropped. “Maybe.”

“What about Blue? Don’t you think she’ll miss you? She called when you were in the hospital. She was very concerned.”

I’m sure the look on my face was a mixture of annoyance and depression. “I seriously doubt Blue will want to date me anymore. I don’t think she’s in to alien girls, being heterosexual and all.”

“Have you asked her?”

That brought me up short. Then she waved her hand which I knew to be a gesture of, “we’ll talk about it later.”

“When is the doctor from STAR Labs going to be by?” she asked.

“What?”

“The doctor that they brought in. While you were sleeping, she told me that they’re a go-between for the government. They help set up new identification… you have no idea what I’m talking about. They didn’t set up an appointment with you to talk about this? She said she would.”

My Sith Mind Trick escape thing was coming back to bite me on my crimson colored butt. “Uh…”

“I’ll call her this morning. She gave me her card.”

“Okay.”

I guess having real ID would be a good thing; legal and all. However, she was a doctor and doctors by nature like to poke people with sharp things.

Having finished my breakfast, I retired to my room and pulled out the GH.

I made a conscious effort to adjust the interface so that the Yoda-Gatekeeper would speak normally.

“Ready to begin today’s lesson you are?”

With a sigh I nodded. “Can I ask a question before we begin?”

His lips pursed with amusement. “A question you can ask. May you another matter is.”

Wonderful, my grammar is being corrected by someone that dangles his participles with every other sentence.

“How likely am I to go dark?”

“Mmm. A difficult question you ask.”

I nodded. “I know I have all the training of a Sith Lord in my head, and I’ve found myself using some of the mind tricks, but Jedi use those too. I mean it’s not like I’m zapping anyone with lightning or anything. I’m not robbing banks, or trying to dominate the world. I’m just a little more angrier than normal.”

“Hmpf, when the time comes to do battle, how will you proceed?”

“Battle?” I nearly chuckled, but I saw that it was a serious question. “I’ve never been in a fight my entire life. In fact I don’t even know anyone that has. What I want to know is does the Dark side make you evil or do you have to be evil to be on the Dark side?”

“Both. Let you speak to Master Qui-Gon Jinn on this subject will I.”

The holo-image wavered for a moment and then another took its place. He was much taller and didn’t look a thing like the actor that played him in the fourth movie. The only thing similar was the robes.

The thing with the other holograms in the GH, they weren’t interactive. They were only recordings, so I couldn’t ask questions. However, I did receive a really long-winded speech about the Living Force and the Unifying force. I was quite bored by the end.

When the Yoda-Gatekeeper returned I was almost falling asleep. Before he could mangle the English language I cut him off and set the GH aside.

I spent the next hour or so meditating on controlling my emotions, a high tenet of the Jedi. I felt if I could do that then I could control the tempest inside me.

~O~

A knock on my door alerted me that I’d fallen asleep somewhere along the line. Meditation and adolescence didn’t seem to flow hand in hand. Sitting still and thinking about peace tended to make me bored, tired, and sleepy, in that order.

“Yeah?”

“Josh, Doctor White is here to see you.”

I was confused for a moment until I got up and answered the door.

“Who?”

“Doctor White from STAR Labs.”

“Oh. Okay.”

She frowned at me. “Straighten out your blouse, honey.”

I looked down and saw it was all askew. “I need to use the bathroom. I’ll be out in a minute.”

Splashing some water on my face woke me up a little more. Looking in the mirror, I winced at the tattoos decorating almost every available patch of skin. I looked like a canvas that some deranged gang-banger wanted to mark up with a black Sharpie. It was really difficult to not look evil with all the graffiti everywhere. I probably should have worn something other than black, but seriously it was the best looking color with my skin tone.

I straighten the blouse and then I had to shift my left breast a little because the sports bra was pinching in an uncomfortable place. It felt so weird to have breasts. It was like adding another two body parts in a random place. In a way I suppose it was exactly like that.

It felt pretty nice when I was handling them. I think that was what disturbed me so much.

I’ve felt Blue’s breasts. They’re very soft and squishy. She has a pair of C-cups; I know because I read the tag after a make-out session.

Coincidently, I had the same size, but they were entirely different. They were the same color as my regular skin, but the things that surround the nipples, the areola were really big, like two inches across with a thimble looking nipple right in the middle. They weren’t as big as a thimble, about half the size actually. Anyway, my breasts were very firm. I had to actually apply pressure when I squeezed them for any effect. Whether that was a good thing or not, I had no idea.

As a guy, I wanted nothing more than to get my hands on a pair of breasts like mine along with other equipment that I currently possess, but since I had acquired said equipment, I didn’t know what to do with it. Everything seemed so wrong.

Doctor White was actually Hispanic. She had curly black hair that was up in a ponytail and dark brown eyes. I thought she looked quite cute even for being an older lady, somewhere in her early thirties if I had to take a guess.

“Josh,” she said as she stood and held out her hand. “I’m Doctor Amelia White. We didn’t get to really meet properly at the hospital.”

I shook her hand and sat down in Dad’s recliner, slouching like I always did. There was a slight adjustment though; my lekku. I let the left one hang and crossed the right one over the top of my breasts and let the tip hang on my left shoulder. It was a more comfortable position than leaning up against them.

Doctor White watched the whole display with interest.

“They’re prehensile… the tentacles?”

I frowned. “They’re called lekku or tchun-tchin. The tchun is the left one and the tchin the right one.”

She gave me a thin-lipped smile. “My apologies. So they’re prehensile?”

I shrugged. “A little. I can move them, but it’s not like I can pick anything up or whatever.”

Yes, I was being a little juvenile, but seriously, a doctor that makes house calls? I didn’t want to be there and I didn’t want her in my house. The only reason I was going along with it was for the ID and to make my mother feel better.

I watched as she withdrew an I-Pad looking thing and started tapping on the screen with her nails.

“With your permission, I’d like to record this interview for our records. We’ll use the images for your new ID as well.”

“Doctor,” Mom interrupted. “Do you normally do this?”

“Please, call me Amelia, and yes, for the most part. At our labs in Chicago, we already have cameras set up for our interviews.”

“No, I mean flying all the way down here. Do you do this for all metahumans?”

She smiled indulgently. “Frankly, no. Josh is a special case. We’ve never been able to observe a metahuman in transition with monitors and regular MRIs. It helps us understand the process much more. Truthfully, the whole process breaks several physical laws of nature, and we’d like to know how. And by the way, Josh isn’t a metahuman.”

That got my attention. “What?”

“Your test results came back before I left the hospital last night. You’re just as regular as the next person, or rather you were. What we’re interested in at the moment is how you managed to accomplish this.”

“Accomplish? What are you talking about?”

While I asked her that question she was adjusting a webcam-like device on the arm of the couch.

“Come on, Josh. Every teen wants to be a superhero; it’s the new rage. We know that. So, how’d you do it?”

Rage? I was about to show her what rage really meant as I leaned forward. “You think I wanted this? You think I wanted to turn into an alien girl, a freak. I can’t even go to school anymore…”

“Josh,” Mom warned me.

Instead of snapping off a few more things I ground my teeth together and leaned back.

“Doctor White, you can’t actually think that my son wanted this. Do you know the amount of morphine he was on just to control the pain he went through?”

She nodded. “I had to ask, Mrs. Walker. There are a growing number of kids out there that think this is another way to skirt the system. They put themselves in peril or take drugs that enhance their bodies. Perhaps you’ve heard of the drug Thrill? It’s put a number of Chicago’s innocent teens in the hospital and killed quite a few more. Keeping in mind that Josh isn’t a metahuman, this raises a significant number of questions.”

I crossed my arms underneath my breasts and scowled at her. Considering my new appearance I’m sure I was somewhat intimidating.

“Setting that aside, would you like to tell me about the circumstances that led to your transition?”

“No,” I said.

“No?”

She obviously heard me so I didn’t bother repeating myself.

“Okay. Let me put it to you this way. You can answer my questions here or there are certain government agencies that will insist you answer their questions in less comfortable surroundings.”

“Did you just threaten him?” asked Mom with a disbelieving voice.

“I’m just stating the facts, Mrs. Walker. How you choose to interpret them is up to you.”

Leaning forward I narrowed my concentration on her eyes. “You will turn off your recorder.”

Doctor White’s face went slack for a moment. “I’m going to turn off my recorder.”

“You’ll tell me what your true agenda is.”

“Josh?” Mom sounded worried.

“I’ll tell you what my true agenda is.”

Holding up a finger to my mother, I forestalled her questions for the moment.

“I needed you to tell me how you changed because I’m not a metahuman and I need to become…”

I concentrated harder. “Tell me.”

“I… I…”

Her will was too strong. She was fighting me. I stood and crossed the floor with my hand out and my fingers in a claw-like position.

“Give me your knowledge.”

“Josh… what are you doing?”

I held up my finger again.

There was a Sith technique that forcibly extracted whatever I needed to know. It wasn’t a light side technique and I knew that, but let’s face it, Doctor White wasn’t one of the good guys.

She groaned as I felt the tendrils of the Force push its way into her head. Then her life opened up to me in a great wave of information.

Doctor White was once Amelia Hernandez and she was a victim of a very abusive childhood. I felt bad for her, but I’m sorry, it wasn’t a good enough reason for what she wanted to do, it was simply an excuse.

People had taken from her all of her life and it seemed that she was going be the taker this time. She wanted power to abuse it and I couldn’t allow that.

With my other hand, I brought it around and extended the Force to alter her perceptions. This was a light side application. They’d performed it dozens of times to their own Jedi. In essence I wiped the abuse from her memory, so it would have no effect on her judgment anymore. I’d see if this had any effect. If it didn’t then I’d have to take stronger measures.

“Relax and reflect, Amelia.”

When I let her go, I stumbled back at the sudden release. Like I said before, using the Force drains you.

“What did you just do?” Mom sounded like she was over her fear and moving on to scolding me like a child.

“She wanted me to tell her how I changed so she could become a super-villain. I couldn’t let her do that.”

“What? How could you know?”

“I’ve… got certain powers, Mom. Let’s get this thing over with and then I’ll explain, okay.”

She didn’t look appeased. “Have you done this with me or your father?”

I winced. “Not exactly?”

She sighed and palmed her face. “If this wasn’t so serious I’d take you across my lap and spank your butt until it was red.”

I didn’t have the heart to point out that she was too late. It was already as red as the rest of me.

While the doctor was still out of it, I went back and erased the bit she already recorded, then I sat back down in the same position I was in when we started this mess.

“Amelia?” I said.

She blinked and widened her eyes. “I’m sorry.” When she brought her hand up and felt her head, I almost smiled. “Headache.”

“Would you like an aspirin?”

“No, thank you. I’m fine. Where was I?”

“You just asked if you could record the interview.”

She shook her head and tapped a couple of things on her I-Pad. “There, we’re ready.”

“Your name is Josh Walker, age sixteen. Presented with fever, hair loss, and debilitating pain two days ago at Christus St. Catherine hospital, Katy, Texas. Correct?”

I nodded. “Right.”

We went through a pretty generic play by play of the events occurring over the last two days. It was all very official. When she got to the part about me not being a metahuman we chatted back and forth about how I wound up changed like all the rest.

“Honestly, I don’t have a clue. One day I was fine and the next, things got weird.”

“Where do you purchase your groceries and do your shopping?”

That’s all we needed: Shop at Kroger and become a Twi’lek.

The questions became boring after that. It ended with her wanting to take air and soil samples from the house and yard. She said since I didn’t present any metahuman powers that the government wouldn’t really be interested in me at that time. Then came the question that I wasn’t expecting.

“What would you like your new name to be?”

Truthfully, I hadn’t even thought about changing my name. I told her as much.

“Well, that’s your choice, but there are not a lot of girls out there with the name Josh.”

“Do I look like a regular girl, Amelia?”

“Point.”

“You might consider it, honey,” said Mom.

Who does this? Who changes their name at the drop of a hat? It was ridiculous. There’s not a person out there that I could fool into thinking that I wasn’t a metahuman and that there was a really good chance that I had changed sex in the process. From what the doctor said, only fifteen percent of the existing metahumans that got real powers actually stayed the same.

“Do I have to?”

Mom sighed. She looked like she was already stressed enough. “Why don’t you pick something for the official records and we can still call you what you want. That way if you change your mind later, you’ll have something to fall back on.”

Okay, I could see that reasoning. It made a modicum of sense. I pondered the names of the Twi’lek that were in the movies and most of them screamed dancing girl/slave. How’s Oola for a name? I mean really: Oola? She was a green Twi’lek slave girl. No thanks.

“Aayla.”

“Spell that for me,” said Amelia.

“A-a-y-l-a.”

“Middle name?”

I shook my head. “Just Aayla Walker is fine.”

Aayla Secura was a Twi’lek Jedi in the fifth movie. She got killed by her own men, and she was a blue Twi’lek, but she was cool in the books I’d read with her in them. I had to face it; I had a crush on her even though she was an alien. Maybe it was because she was actually clothed, for the most part, and not on display like a stripper.

“Okay, Aayla, I’ve just sent over your information. It’ll take a day or so for them to verify that you’re you with the hospital and then they’ll send out your credentials. It shouldn’t be more than three days.”

~O~

When my mother shut the front door she spun around on me and pointed an accusing finger. “Now, you’ll explain yourself, young man… lady.”

I winced at the word change. I still thought of myself as a guy. Having it shoved in my face like that wasn’t pleasant.

“In my room.”

“Here is good enough.”

“No, I have the proof in my room, or else you’ll think I’m crazy.”

She followed me and when I opened my door and pointed at the GH Mom looked a little lost.

“What’s that?”

“You’ve seen Star Wars, Mom, right?”

She nodded.

~O~

That didn’t go over very well. After I explained everything, she was on the phone screaming at my dad. The words, “get your ass home right now!” may have been used at some point.

While I waited for him, I meditated. Using Sith powers had to put a black mark against me in the whole worldview thing. There I was trying not to use them, but when the first opportunity came to hold back, what did I do? The thing about the Sith is that it’s addictive and every time you use the power, it turns you more to the dark side, no matter the reason.

Think of it like sinning except it’s more evident. My yellow and red eyes? Yeah, they were Darth Talon’s, but they were that color because of using the dark side of the Force.

I told the Yoda-Gatekeeper what I did. No excuses were given; I just laid out the facts for him and let him tell me what I did wrong.

“Troubling this is.”

“You’re telling me.”

“In times of trouble the dark side exercises its hold the most.”

I nodded. “I know.”

“Refrain, you must.”

“I’ll try.”

“Do or do not. There is no try.”

I smiled slightly at the famous line.

“Then I will do.”

“Hmph.”

~O~

A knock sounded on my door after I heard the phone ring. I’d been dreading the moment that I’d receive a phone call. Mom opened the door.

“Aayla, that was Blue. She’s on her way over.”

“What?” I didn’t correct her on the whole name change thing because I was so stunned.

“I tried to talk her out of it, but she insisted she see you.”

“Did you tell her…”

“I told her you were a metahuman and you’d gone through a few changes.”

“But I’m not,” I said.

She shrugged. “It’ll be easier to explain if you tell people that you are. Less questions will be asked that you can’t answer.”

I nodded. “Okay.”

“Straighten your blouse out, honey.”

Blue had her own car, which was another reason I was dating her at the time. I’m superficial, or I was, rather. Having this thing forced on me kind of changed my perspective. What I’m getting at is that she arrived in only a few minutes since school was about mile and a half a way.

I waited in my room patiently, trying to think about what I was going to say and about what her reaction might be.

Blue was flighty to say the least. Unpredictable would be a better word, I guess. There was no telling what she would think about any given subject. It was best to just ask her and she’d tell you the unvarnished truth. That was about the only thing you could count on with her, well, that and her incessant teasing. She had a hot body and she knew it.

The doorbell rang and my nervousness increased geometrically.

Two or three minutes later there was a knock at my door. I had a sudden urge to hide in the closet and just talk to her through the little slits in the door, but that would only postpone the inevitable.

“Oh my God.” She stood in the doorway, not entering the room.

“Hey, Blue,” I muttered.

“Who am I going to go to Junior Prom with now?”

Like I said, she’s unpredictable.

“What’s that on your head? You’re bald and you have tentacles growing out of your head.”

I reached up. “Really I hadn’t noticed? Are you coming in?”

She looked at me warily. “I’m not going to catch it, am I?”

After a shake of my head she came in and tossed her purse on the bed. “I can’t believe this is happening. My reputation will be ruined. I’ll be the alien girl’s ex-girlfriend.”

Well, that pretty much answered any question of if we were going to break up or not. She dropped her butt down on the bed and scowled at me.

“Sorry for ruining your reputation. That was the first thing I thought about when I woke up looking like this.”

She pointed her finger at me. “Don’t you start on me, Josh! Look at you. What am I supposed to say?”

“I’m sorry that it happened, Josh?” I offered. “I won’t be a bitch about this, Josh? Either one of those would be fine to start with.”

“Bitch? Me?” She smiled sardonically. “It looks like you’re the bitch now.”

I took a deep breath so I wouldn’t feel the need to throw Sith Lightning at her ass. “Can we not do this, Blue? You’re the one that insisted on coming over.”

“Fuck, Josh.” She leaned over and cupped her face with her hands. “I was going to give my virginity to you at Junior Prom.”

Dammit! Three weeks and I would have gotten laid! Not even three weeks. It was more like two weeks and three days! I was this close!

“Well, you don’t have to worry about that anymore, unless you have any lesbian tendencies that I should…” I couldn’t even get the whole sentence out before she snapped her head up and glared at me. “Fine.”

Her face relaxed and turned into a frown. “God… are you… I mean, red all over?”

I nodded. “The tattoos too; everywhere.”

“Look at your nails. They’re like talons. Why’d you paint them black?”

“I didn’t. That’s their natural color.”

A moment of peace passed between us. At least we weren’t yelling at each other anymore.

“I want to see,” she said.

“What?”

“Take your clothes off.”

I couldn’t believe she was saying this. “Uh, no.”

“Josh… I just need to see. We’re both girls here now.”

With a single sarcastic laugh I said, “And that’s supposed to make it all right for me to strip? I don’t think so. Not unless you do too.”

She snorted. “You wish. At least take your top off. You’ve already seen my tits. Fair is fair.”

Rolling my tongue around my mouth I could only come to one conclusion. “You really do have lesbian tendencies.”

“Bitch,” she snarled. “Just do it already.”

If there was a single chance in a thousand that Blue might stay with me I had to take it. If that meant showing her my crimson-colored breasts then so be it. A minute later I had the blouse unbuttoned. I blame the nails. I really had to cut those things to a more manageable length.

The rest came off pretty easily.

“They’re unreal,” she gasped while standing up to get a closer look.

Holding her hand out over one of the tattoos, she looked up at me. “Do they hurt?”

I shook my head. “No, it’s just part of my skin.”

With that, she tweaked my right nipple. “You’re firm.”

I nodded and felt something inside of me respond to her touch.

“Take the rest off.” She said it with a soft breathy voice, the one she used when she was flirting with me.

Without another thought I undid my boot laces, tossed them off and then stripped the bottoms off.

“No panties?” she said with a throaty voice.

“I haven’t really gotten that far.”

Blue twirled her finger. “Turn around I want to get the full show.”

I was really beginning to get horny and it was an entirely different feeling as a girl. Doing as she instructed, I slowly gave her something to see. When I completed the rotation I saw she had her cell phone held up and I heard a distinct sound of the camera feature being used.

“I can’t believe you fell for that,” she said with a laugh. “Oh my god, you are such an alien lesbian horny freak, and I’ve got the proof.”

Something broke inside me. All my fears had come true and there was my ex-girlfriend laughing at me and the oddity I had become. Raising my hand I forced my humiliation out to her and in the next second, she was rising up off the floor grabbing at her throat gasping for air.

“You think you can come in here and do this? Take my picture and plaster it on the internet or something without repercussions?”

Blue gasped and wheezed.

“Do you know what I am, Blue? I’m a Sith Lady. I could crush your throat with a thought. I could invade your mind and make you experience your worst fears for the rest of your life. I could drain your mind dry and leave you like an empty husk in the floor. I could break every bone in your body, heal them and break them all over again, and you think you can do this to me?”

Tears dropped from her eyes and I let her go, watching as she fell a foot from the floor. She gasped in a chest full of air and kicked herself away until she was trapped against the bed.

I levitated the cell phone in front of me and ripped off the back, the battery and the SIM card that was inside, letting the other pieces fall; I crushed the SIM card and let it go as well.

Slowly and methodically I dressed while she cried quiet sobs. My anger raged inside. I wanted to break her, but I knew if I did then I would have taken one step too far.

“What to do with you. What to do.”

“I won’t say anything. I p-promise.”

Squatting down in front of her, I smiled. “Oh, I know you won’t, because you know what will happen if you do?”

Another sob escaped from her throat.

“No, I won’t kill you. That would be too easy, Blue. That would be way too easy. I’ll let you use your imagination. Anything, Blue; if I even suspect that you are spreading rumors about me… well, you really don’t want to find out what would happen. Now get out, and don’t forget your phone.”

She didn’t need any encouragement.

When I heard the front door close and her tires squeal soon thereafter I opened my closet, stepped in and closed the door. I moved a few things around and made space in the corner, where I sat with my knees up under my chin and cried my tears of anger.

TBC...

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Comments

Still Love It :)

Enemyoffun's picture

Once again I can post without reading because I've already read it. I love how she gets Blue in the end of this. When you first brought her in I thought for a second you might do a lesbian relationship but I quickly realized how wrong I was.

Is it just me or does the Imperial Death March play through everyone else's head too?

EOF

I thought about using Blue

I thought about using Blue to form a Lesbian relationship, but I realized I was being too easy on Josh if she was going to go Dark by story's end. And I'd really hate relying on one single incident to push her over. There must be several factors involved to bring out enough rage to change her over and not quite enough to attract a Red Power Ring.

~Lili

Blog: http://lilithlangtree.tglibrary.com/
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/lilith_langtree

~Lili

Write the story that you most desperately want to read.

Red Power Ring

Enemyoffun's picture

Is that a nudge to get me to start working on Red Lantern story :)

Heh

A Twilek Red Lantern? Might be cool but you're right that Sith Red Lantern would be too much. :)
ooh! Maybe Blue can get a ring? Yellow maybe?
There's no supervillain nemesis like an ex gone all Sinestro on you. :D

Red vs Blue

Blue really got what was coming to her. I though I might have difficulties sympathizing with Josh, but now I'm rooting for her, woo!

Great story.

The problem with cookies.... !

PattieBFine's picture

WHEN!? have you EVER been able to eat just ONE!? So...

Yah just gota keep doing BAD stuff just to have a cookie to make it all better! :-)

I found I had to switch to crackers... their less fattening!

May The Force Be...

Any hope of returning to the light?

Drakira's picture

Nope. I don't think so. If you can do that to your love on reflex, there doesn't look to be any hope of getting away from the Dark Side. This is definitely another fine piece of work, wondering what plot she is thinking of now...

Drakira

Drakira

Justified?

Actually she didn't do anything particularily dark. She has major anger issues, an betrayal such as this by your exgirlfriend would cause everyone going ballistic.

She'll probably go to joda to get a shoulder to cry on and he might go all high an mighy on her which might lead to a "fuck-you" compassionless jedi attitude.

Seriously, she'd need a timeout to get into a stable state of mind.
As long as she doesn't believe in the sith philosophy there is hope. She might not be the most stable cookie, but what she did until now is forgivable imho.
Iguess someone will finally push her to hard and she'll snap and kill that person. Thinking she's to far gone anyway she might embrace the sith way of life. Even then she might bounce back given a great enough incentive. (Darth Vader - lol)

She should read some hobbes so that she knows what to expect. About human nature and when she's an outcast. That might dissillusion her, but might save her in the end because she'd know what and what not to expect from her fellow humans.

Thank you for writing this very intense story lilith.

Beyogi

That's the thing; her use of

That's the thing; her use of powers so far is understandable, maybe not totally acceptable, but understandable. However, you can't use the Dark side, at all, even with good intentions. Chapter 3 touches on the reason a little.

I don't think Aayla will be the megalomaniac that all the other Sith Lords were, just taking power for power's sake. She'll need a good reason to go dark and stay that way, at least for a long enough time to be considered an ongoing villain.

~Lili

Blog: http://lilithlangtree.tglibrary.com/
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/lilith_langtree

~Lili

Write the story that you most desperately want to read.

Imperial March

Anyone who isn't listening to John William's Imperial March as they read this is missing part of the experience. Josh is trying but inch by inch she sliding towards the Dark Side. A lot of questions were answered, but more remain. I'm sure that Dad will put some to rest.

Blue however was a piece of work and unfortunately a typical teenage flighty girl more concerned about herself than with loyalty. I can't feel sorry about what happened to her, but I can feel that way for Josh/Aayla. She didn't deserve that. She really needs a good mentor who is right there with her, and not far, far away in another Galaxy.

It does so remind of the what the prequels was suppose to be. I think the best piece of Episode One was the movie poster. It showed a young Anakin Skywalker casting a shadow of Darth Vader. It's that way with Josh/Aayla. We see the good kid, but Talon's Shadow is being cast behind her.

As you say not a happy ending on the horizon for her, but like that proverbial train-wreck I can't look away.
Hugs!
Grover

There's a pretty good

There's a pretty good picture of Talon in front of a Vader mask, reminiscent of that poster, but she's got her light saber ignited and we haven't quite progressed that far in the story yet.

I had fun with Blue in this chapter. She's dedicated to a girl I used to know who was exactly like I portrayed here. She'll be back a little later for some more.

The majority of question that were asked before have been answered and we can move on to the meat of the story, but like you said, there are a few more. Dad might be a little help.

~Lili

Blog: http://lilithlangtree.tglibrary.com/
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/lilith_langtree

~Lili

Write the story that you most desperately want to read.

Yes, it has a bit of Greek Tragedy

In a Greek tragedy, the best intentions lead to ruin. In Josh/Aayla's case, the intentions are not always the best but she starts out as rather average person. A bit thoughtless about hurting others with her mind control tricks, but not really evil.
Then, a series of bad encounters is pushing her to use more and more of the Dark Side. At the moment, I guess having some real friends could still turn things around. But somehow I think that is not where Lilith is going with that story...

Edit: Dispensing a kudo, this is one of the better stories on BCTS :-)

I made Josh a particularly

I made Josh a particularly average teenage boy: a little self-centered, a little overly dramatic, and thoughtless at times. Give someone like that real power and what would you have? He wants to do right, but it would be sooooooo easy to abuse that power, just a little, when someone pisses you off to no end. The trouble with this particular power though is it will consume you; there's no being careful with it. Use it and you will go dark.

I can't say anything about the rest. Plot reasons. Find out in the next chapter!

~Lili

Blog: http://lilithlangtree.tglibrary.com/
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/lilith_langtree

~Lili

Write the story that you most desperately want to read.

Blue

Interesting name for a girl. What a creep. Her boyfriend gets turned into an alien girl, and she thinks only of taking pictures of her naked?

Dorothycolleen

DogSig.png

Blue was derived from two

Blue was derived from two different places. The more important one was the cute blue dog from Blue's Clues! The other was from the same comic series I swiped Darth Talon from: there's a girl alien named Delilah Blue, and I thought it was really cute, but the dog was cuter.

Pictures: Considering some of the raunchy stuff I've seen on social networks, I thought this was right in line. ;)

~Lili

Blog: http://lilithlangtree.tglibrary.com/
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/lilith_langtree

~Lili

Write the story that you most desperately want to read.

Fabulous and

Fabulous and fatalist.
Moving inexorably towards the dark side.
Do or do not, there is no try....
Power corrupting good.
Mmm - hurt you will, your friends lost you have.

These are not the emotions you seek

How to win friends and influence people...

... the Sith way :)

Even without the author warnings, it's fairly easy to see that Josh / Aayla is already veering down the slippery slope. What will be interesting to see over the coming chapters is the balance between thoughts, actions, restraint and regret.

-oOo-

Thinking away from the story, it could be interesting to see how someone would cope with being transformed into a Twi'lek without Sith assistance, and/or someone who 'inherits' The Force but successfully navigates the tightrope between the two main camps of users (Jedi / Sith) rather than falling into one camp or the other.

 

Bike Resources

There are 10 kinds of people in the world - those who understand binary and those who don't...

As the right side of the brain controls the left side of the body, then only left-handers are in their right mind!

There is a group of Force

There is a group of Force Sensitive people (Dathomiri Witches)that use the Force like magic, through song, music, dance, etc. They use both sides (being Gray) without falling prey to the dark, although there is a Dark group of them as well (Nightwitches). I was thinking about bringing one of these into the mix in another story down the line so the good-girls have something to battle her with.

While she wouldn't be a Twi-lek, I have a number of races to choose from that are just as interesting.

~Lili

Blog: http://lilithlangtree.tglibrary.com/
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/lilith_langtree

~Lili

Write the story that you most desperately want to read.

Bound to Serve the Dark: 2/8

Will she be able to choose her path? Or will the dark side take over?

    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine
    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine

Have you read the Author's Note?

It's a couple of lines of text below the title and above the story content, which should answer your question :)

There's also a rather big hint in the story title and tag-line...

--B


As the right side of the brain controls the left side of the body, then only left-handers are in their right mind!

SW:TOR

Darnit! now I really want to play The Old Republic now.....

Viva La Revan :)

Enemyoffun's picture

I love Revan. There was no badder bad ass in the Galaxy than Darth Revan :)

The fuzzy faced guy got rid

The fuzzy faced guy got rid of his best villain when he killed off Grand Moff Tarkin.

Then again...

...he also created what was possibly the world's most annoying CGI creature... who spent a fair amount of time on-screen in Phantom Menace...

--B


As the right side of the brain controls the left side of the body, then only left-handers are in their right mind!

That was like the only

That was like the only character I liked from those movies.

Proud and only member of the Jar Jar Binks Fan Club.

Then you ought to

Go and visit the Darths and Droids webcomic. It has the proud distinction of calling Jar Jar a genius. :)

Faraway


On rights of free advertisement:
Big Closet Top Shelf

Where you can fool around like you want to and most you get is some bemused good ribbing!

Faraway


On rights of free advertisement:
Big Closet Top Shelf

Where you can fool around like you want to and most you get is some bemused good ribbing!

Jedi prohibition on relationships?

I understood (but I may be wrong) that the Jedi prohibition on relationships is because of things like this - dating generally happens before long term commitments, and at the end of a highly emotional relationship there's a significant chance for anger, even if unrealised, at how it ended. In the hands of a Force sensitive, that could be the beginning of the slippery slope to the dark side.

It's not so much because you

It's not so much because you might get seriously ticked at your significant other, it's strong emotions in general that they want to limit them on. Peace of mind is their big thing; as long as you're chillaxing anything is possible with the Force. Strong emotions are the Dark Side.

Which doesn't make sense, because Ben always told Luke to "reach out with your feelings."

Anyway, you're right that they don't allow relationships. Big nono.

~Lili

Blog: http://lilithlangtree.tglibrary.com/
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/lilith_langtree

~Lili

Write the story that you most desperately want to read.

Ironically

It could be stated that Anakin fell not because falling in love is bad (after, love is how Luke saved him) but because the code made so he couldn't go to the Jedi for help. If he thought he could go talk to Obi-wan about his wife he probably would have. In fact, if the Jedi didn't have that rule, Anakin's passions would have been close to a non-issue. At the very least, he wouldn't have gone to Palpatine for help.

Which is probably why when Luke made his academy he let his students have relationships. Love actually helps against the darkside. It's one of the most unselfish emotions there is.

What a bitch

Blue, not Josh/Aayla. You're not only making a 3D villain, but a sympathetic one also.

The true question is how far to the Darkside will she fall. There is using her power for evil, and abusing her power for evil.

I'm in the camp that a

I'm in the camp that a decent villain is one that truly believes what they are doing is in the best interest of the world/country/family/etc. They're totally wrong, but they think they're right and can't be dissuaded from their chosen path.

The best villain is one that does it for a really good reason that makes sense. They know what they're doing is wrong, but there's no other way to accomplish their objective. However, those are pretty much called anti-heroes.

~Lili

Blog: http://lilithlangtree.tglibrary.com/
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/lilith_langtree

~Lili

Write the story that you most desperately want to read.

No save her from that fate.

How dare you think of making her a politician.

Nearly all politicians think that they are doing is in the best interest of the world/country/family/etc., but are almost always wrong. (The other politicians are working in their own best interest and know it.)

True believers can be very effective villains

After reading part of "Mein Kampf", I got the impression that Hitler belonged to the first group you mention:

He did NOT have a really good reason. But he seemed to believe in his own antisemitic drivel. The style of his writing was that of a fanatic rather than a slick PR guy, so I assume he was honest about thinking that the Jews were enemies of the German people.
So I think there is a truly appalling example of the "decent villain" in real history.

Wow!!!

A Star Wars retcon with none other than Darth Talon (who is extremely....fascinating) and then you also set it in my original hometown of Katy, Texas too. I didn't think many people knew where Katy was. :P
Shannon Johnston

Samirah M. Johnstone

I used to live off of

I used to live off of Barker-Cypress for about 4 years, so I'm quite familiar with the area. The whole west side really. for those not in the know: Katy is a city that bumps up against Houston on the west side. Mostly suburban nowadays.

~Lili

Blog: http://lilithlangtree.tglibrary.com/
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/lilith_langtree

~Lili

Write the story that you most desperately want to read.

I lived in Memorial Parkway

I lived in Memorial Parkway off Mason Rd. Went to Taylor HS for my freshman year (though moved right after that). I still have very fond memories of growing up there, and my two best friends are doctors at the hospital there right by Katy Mills Mall.
Shannon Johnston

Samirah M. Johnstone

I've just read both the first two episodes...

...in one sitting, and I'm a little blown away. Beautifully thought out retconning. :-D

I can't wait to see where you go with this.

The plot gets much more

The plot gets much more intricate as we move on and not so much fighting the temptation of evil. I didn't want it to be too obvious that Aayla is hellbent on being a villain. We all know that she will be, but that isn't all she is. Setting it up was a challenge considering everything that i wanted to accomplish by the story's end.

~Lili

Blog: http://lilithlangtree.tglibrary.com/
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/lilith_langtree

~Lili

Write the story that you most desperately want to read.

Lord Acton said power corrupts

janet_L.'s picture

Lord Acton said power corrupts. . .

But I beg to differ: It is the EXERCISE of power which corrupts.

The problem with having power is that it is nearly impossible NOT to exercise it when you think you have a good reason.

Aayla has had pretty good reasons for everything she has done so far, but every use makes it just a little more tempting to use it again, and with less and less justification beyond, "Because I can. . ."

A great story thus far. Will Aayla be a tragic anti-hero, or is salvation lurking amongst the Jedi booty. . .

Wow

I really feel for Aayla/Josh. She's trying not to give in, but that anger must eat her up inside. That last part was definitively the most powerful. Blue was being such a bitch, and it would have been so easy to lash out just a bit harder. I really felt for her when she cried in the closet.

I can't wait to read more. Good stuff! :-D


-Christelle

"Fun-loving geek-chick who's addicted to sunlight!"


-Christelle

"Fun-loving geek-chick who's addicted to sunlight!"

ouch

Now, that's one mean GF. You sure she ever was one?

ouch^2

double post?
On the other tentacle, that GF was double mean..