Images 26

Chapter 26

I wake up with this ow feeling in my groin. Not a big ow since my surgery was a week ago but still and ow nonetheless. The operation went well pretty much It was actually a day surgery procedure there at the same hospital as Taylor was at. I was put under, a few snips I guess and out they came and they lasered some of it and fixed me up and wow the difference has been so…huge really. Other than one final bit I’m almost really me. They actually took notes and stuff for my SRS doctors in Montreal.

But it’s not the fading tenderness that wakes me it’s Taylor rolling out of bed and stumbling to the bathroom to hurl his guts out. Just to be sure, they put him on some kind of meds that are making him feel sick some mornings; just to be sure they gave him small doses of chemotherapy. Let me tell you after having him here home for four days and as sick as he is and them telling me when I took him to the emergency room that everything was “normal.” There’s no such thing as a small dose of chemotherapy.

Taylor’s throwing up and I roll out of bed myself and head over to him in just my underwear. He’s pale and the bandages are off but you can still see the red-pink of the scar tissue still on its way to fading. He’s doing that fast pant three-four times then trying to suck in a breath of air, the sound he makes I know it hurts. He’s taken this bout of the chemo really bad and he’s been sick a couple of times a day. I know the feeling I know it from the way I’d feel sick from starting my hormones. Actually I don’t think I was anywhere close to the way that Taylor is.

I do what just comes. I sit on the edge of the tub and I rub his back and I wet a wash cloth in the tub and use it to wash his face gently then just to wipe the sweat off him a bit and kiss him a few times on his face, his forehead. Then I get his toothbrush for him and pull him over so his backs against my legs and let him just brush his teeth and sit there and lean on me until he gets his wind back. He’s a Colgate kid, I can’t use the stuff I’ve got to have my close up I don’t know why but it’s been that way ever since I started being Jenna I’ve always used that dark red clear toothpaste.

Anyway after that he’s moving on his own and we take a shower together. Not that he’s in the mood for fun but it does save water and we’ve got a nice big shower plus there’s this few bits of time that we steal way just being intimate. Just a few kisses and washing and touching each other. I’m a firm believer that touch is a really unlooked at sense really, I mean there’s a lot more in my opinion just touching and being in contact with someone you love than kissing, hugging and making love. Those are all really great things but there’s more or there can be more.

I get out and get dried off then take my meds and then get dressed it’s just the normal although I think that I’m starting to see a bit of a change in where things are settling without my old bits influence. My panties are snugger and fit better but it feels like there might be some settling in the bottom and my bras are starting to get a little towards getting tighter? I’m not sure and I’m going to have to get another opinion or just see if these changes keep going. I thought that I’d be like more emotional and weepier but I’m not. If anything I feel fuller? Like the me hiding inside is closer to being in her own skin finally and with all of that there’s this calmer feeling too most of the time. I’m not just that but I feel more content.

People talk a lot about wanting to be happy. Right now I’m pretty good with feeling okay.

I slip into some nice underwear and then a short black denim skirt and my work shirt for the diner and some comfortable flats and grab my apron and head downstairs stopping in at the office to kiss Taylor. He’d really rather be cooking and stuff but there’s just too much going on scent wise for him to not get queasy right now as things are standing. So instead; he’s in the office doing up all the paperwork and the pays and getting things fixed up for the diner.

It’s still early so first thing in goes the bread and rolls and stuff we need to get going. We make the different dough the night before and I let it proof over night and I’ve even got a few more things going. Like going out onto the loading dock and getting the bbq going and tossing in a tinfoil wrapped bundle of maple chips on the lava rock there and after that I go in and turn out ten dozen bagels and dump them into the three big soup pots that I’ve got going full of water and a few other things. I see Dallas show up early to help me and it’s cool that she’s working here now and she really needed the job I guess. In this economy a decent paying job with tips and benefits is really hard to find. She’s a really good worker and out of all the girls closest to my age being only twenty. She gets started on the pies and getting the sandwich fillings ready and stocking the take out bags and stuff too. Nin and Holly land in and the boys get their coffees and the first sandwiches as well as the first of the bagels off the BBQ. I cook then on several cookie sheets and the smoke packet in the BBQ gives them this wood over flavor. I’ve actually got the cookie sheets on some bricks so it’s not really direct heat but enough to cook them. I do sesame seed, onion, poppy seed, a rosemary one and plain. I wrecked three batches getting this right but they’ve come out pretty good and these will be gone this morning.

We get into the swing of things getting everything going and I make my daily big batch of cinnamon rolls and I do up a batch of caramel rolls in which I put in a lot of ginger into the roll and lots of thin strips of mandarin orange peel that I’ve candied. There’s dry ginger powder in the dough itself too, because really as good as they might be and they are pretty good I made the first one’s for Taylor because ginger’s good for and upset stomach. It’ll take him about forty minutes to get it eaten and about an hour after that he’ll usually feel like eating and by that time there’s some of the dinner stuff done. He likes my bagels too; he’ll have one plain with regular cream cheese.

It’s a madhouse though as usual here. We’re down by the train yards so we get a lot of people who work the trains and from the warehouses and shops and all the local spin off stuff. Word of mouth and stuff hits us too we actually get a lot of people in from blocks away because it’s easier to drive through our area than fight traffic sometimes and we’ve got a take out window, but it’s been a little crazy lately with us re-opening after Taylor’s surgery and a ton of people are here more than usual because of word of mouth about Taylor being sick.

I get a lot of well wishes and hugs and all these really good things being Taylor’s wife or “Missus T.” Or “Missus Taylor” from some of our regulars. We have a lot of Italian guys actually down here that moved here generations ago to work stuff like the railways and all sorts of other stuff. A lot of people think of western Canada and its all Native Americans, Ukrainians, Germans and lately Indian and Asians but we really do have it all. I call these guys my “Hey, how you doin?” guys, y’know off of the Joey character from friends. Mostly though I get Jenna or just Jen. It’s really strange but in this great way. More people know me as Jenna than there ever was who knew me as Jaime. It actually startled me at first but I’m used to it now and I’m even using it.

There’s a bunch of water bottles set up in the place with different cancer charities and one for a couple of the local women’s shelters and another for aid in Africa and I put some up for the United Way and Warchild and Right to play, the local food banks and even the homeless shelters here in town there‘s twelve bottles total. Davey built us this rack for them slightly tilted up near the front doors where we used to have a place to put your coats. We all put our nickels and pennies in them and it’s really cool to see them filling up.

We’re that busy that the tips are great for the girls and yeah I’m missing out being the cook but I’m part owner now too so that’s why I don’t take a share of the tips. I’ll never agree with that, it takes away from the much needed cash the waitresses earn. You don’t wait tables for the base wages.

It’s getting clear around lunch though that we’re going to need more help soon. Dallas is great and she works her butt off but lately we’ve been busier than ever. I get orders from Angie and some of the nurses now for deliveries which right now we can only send by cab. I don’t mind that and it gave Taylor something else to do in negotiating a deal with one of the cab companies. We needed a flat fee because there’s a meter in most cabs and traffic could drive the delivery prices up. And Tim and Davey order from their job sites and the guys with them do too and more and more places are getting us to deliver lately. This actually brings a lot of cab drivers in here from white star cab company here and they even get a lot of customers with people heading back from lunch with us too full to walk back to their offices.

I smile after the lunch rush and let Holly take over while I slip off and take a quick cooling shower and then get a nice lunch of my smoked turkey soup. We use a lot of turkey to slice for our sandwiches and I take the bones and the carcass of them and toss them in the BBQ with a smoke pack or to finish the smoke if it’s still going from the bagels. I just toss them into the soup pot with diced celery and carrots, a grated parsnip and some squash covered with cumin that’s been roasted in the oven. I season it with a bit of nutmeg, and a lot of black ground pepper and some chopped thyme and sage. I finish it with frozen peas and the baked leftover bits of pie crusts…try that some time just toss them with salt and pepper then bake them like pot-pie croutons for your soups. I do them all the time because they go so good with most of our soups.

I head in with two bowls of that to Taylor who’s taking a nap on the office couch. The desk’s all neat and the place is well ordered and I see our laundry folded in the baskets on the coffee table in from of him. I move the clothes and set down our lunch and kneel on the floor and slowly and gently kiss him awake.

I love it when he opens those mountain meets sky blue/grey eyes. I nuzzle him and put my face into his chest and inhale deeply taking in his scent. I love the way he smells. He runs his fingers through my hair; it’s long enough to do that now just starting to brush the base of my neck.

“Mmm, that feels so nice.” I murmur into his chest and take another inhale but slide my arms to hug him a bit.

“So does that. I’m sorry I drifted off. What time is it?”

“That’s okay honey you need to rest and recover still y’know the operation and stuff taking a lot out of you.”

“Yeah, I’m really sick and tired of being sick and tired.”

I sit up and reach over and pull his head over and kiss him. “I know but we do your recovery right, I want you around a long time mister.”

“Yes Ma’am.” he says smiling and kisses me. God…as tough as things are right now it all becomes worth it. Just seeing him give me that smile and kissing with him is just perfect. We kiss for a few minutes before I break the kiss. “Soup’s getting cold.”

Instead of sitting up on the couch he takes the quilt and stuff and slides off the floor to sit beside me on the floor and use the couch as our backrest and pull the coffee table closer to eat and snuggle together. It’s just a break in our day but it’s so nice really.

“We really need some more staff Taylor. It’s getting really busier and busier lately.”

Tay’s hands slide over my sides and he kind of holds me but holding me in nice places. “I know. I had a good turn out most day’s y’know but things really sort of really turned up since you came into my life.”

Ooooh…He kisses me in that really nice soft way…it brings me to this edge of that shaky blissed out sighs. I feel the whisper kiss mixture of his soft lips over my collar bone to my neck and side of my neck up to my ear… “I…I…I’m not what made all these people, show up Tay… (Gasp, biting my bottom lip as he cups my breasts.)…There’s just been more stuff going on…there’s a bunch of them…that like you and …and they’re glad you’re back…” Oh it’s been way too long since he’s felt like this. I mean it really hasn’t been that long but it’s been that long. I am a newly wed you know. There’s a certain ideal we should be upholding.

“No, Jen it’s been you. It’s how happy you make the place, the fact you’re a natural in the kitchen and people really like you. You keep you’re head when it’s busy and you have great ideas too.” He keeps kissing me and gently but insistently fondling my breasts. I last about maybe another forty seconds of that before I pull off my shirt and even as I’m doing that and trying to turn around to face him at the same time Taylor’s unhooking my bra.

That first exquisite feeling of those hands of his sweeping first over the sensitive skin of my breast and them cupping them is second only to his mouth taking in one of my nipples and making me shudder as he kisses/suckles on it like a very, very romantic Frenchman.

The skirt comes up and the panties come down and I’m soon freeing Taylor out of his jeans and stroking him. Luckily there’s some lube in his pocket and soon I’m easing onto him and…and…god it’s only been a short while but it feels like it’s been too long as the feelings that I’ve gotten very used to are very new again and he feels so much harder…bigger than before…a little painful stretching after such a break but good enough that the feeling of my husband inside me coupled with the attention he’s giving my breasts has my eyes rolling back in my head. He’s still taking it easy trying not to run out of steam with me, he’s still sick so after a few minutes of him working his majik on me I push him back more into the couch and kiss him.

“Here, let me Taylor…” and I proceed to do all the work being on top and all that. I don’t really get “hard” but there’s sort of something and I’m very shocked at the first orgasm that I have. I kind of twitch “there” but that’s about it and I feel…oh my god the feeling isn’t anything like I’ve had before. It’s like a bomb of yay when off inside of me, it feels like it came from somewhere deeper than before but it washes over me in this flush like wave and instead of that acute place that all those feelings went to there something totally different with the warm shockwave of pleasure rushing through my body and I swear I can feel it in my fingers and toes even…. Feel my nipples get so hard they sort of tingle and burn in a good way…I swear I feel my pupils dilate.

Then it fades into this full body sort of hum and this ache for more…I cry out, bite his shoulder and move on him hard and fast actually breasts heaving and bouncing which makes me hyper aware of them and even more turned on…it doesn’t take long before I’m holding onto him and panting and kind of hanging on for dear life as another wave like that first one runs through me…then Taylor cries out and I feel him twitching inside me his hips pushing into me trying to drive himself deeper and deeper but he’s already buried as deep as he can go inside of me. I feel the surge of his liquid heat inside of me and it’s a sexual affirming baptism for me. He squeezes me so tight in his arms it almost hurts and he cries out. “Jen!, Jenna! Oh fff Jen!” before falling heavy back against the couch and panting hard. He’s still got a hold of me and I lean on him just kind of zoning out in this pleasure filled haze that’s so much kind of like when you’re over tired and fighting off sleep, but this isn’t from lack of sleep even though I close my eyes for a few minutes. Not too long after he slips out of me and we kiss for a few minutes.

“I’ve really got to be getting back to work honey.” I tell him through an I love you smile and a kiss. “We still need to hire some more people here.”

“Okay, but we really don’t have a lot of space to move around in you know.”

“Well we’re doing a lot of take out stuff and we could use someone outside taking orders for the breakfast and the lunchtime crowds when the place really gets busy and fills up. We could also use someone at out take out window, I’m cooking and Holly’s behind the counter and that just leaves Dallas and Njinda on the floor to do the tables.”

He nods starting to look tired and I go to the bathroom take a quick wipe and then get a wash clothe actually two and use one to clean him off and the other to wipe some of the sweat and sex smell off of him. He looks done in. I bite my lip. “C’mon upstairs handsome get some real rest in our bed.” He just nods too tired to argue with me. I help him upstairs after putting my panties and top back on quickly. I kiss him once we’re there. “I think next time we take making love a little bit slower my love.” He kisses me back.

“Sorry Jen, you just smelled so good and it’s been so long and I…” I kiss him, to shut him up. Actually I kiss him a couple of times.

“No sorries honey, I wanted it as much as you did and we just got carried away a bit. Besides it’s a real good sign isn’t it.?” I grin at him and give him my biggest I’m happy smile, my man rocks smile then rub my forehead on his. He smiles back and has this happy sleepy kitty look. “Yeah it’s a very good sign.”

He lays back and I slip down to the office and grab my skirt and bra and then take another shower and get “cleaned” up. I use a use a bit more deodorant because the afternoon is the hottest time in the kitchen and slip into a new set of nice underwear and another work shirt and another skirt. I head down and take the dishes with me and start back to the afternoon work of a bit of mild cooking and getting stuff ready for supper tonight.

The main special is a Salisbury steak dinner. I use a lot of hamburger but into it I blitz up in the food processor a pound of chicken livers until they are mush, the same with three onions and bunch of garlic then add in a tablespoon of anchovy paste and some eggs and breadcrumbs. The gravy is ten blitzed up onions and three sticks of blitzed up celery, two chopped red chilli peppers, and a cup of HP sauce, beef stock paste and a half cup of L&P Worcestershire sauce and brown sugar all in with three cups of flour cooked to a nutty brown in butter. Once that’s a real mess I open and pour three cans of Guinness and three cups of black coffee and stir it smooth then let it simmer on one of the back burners until the suppertime crowd comes in. Veggies and the choice of baked potato wedges or mashed potatoes and that’s the special. I do a spaghetti sauce and have that at the ready too along with a nice large roast of beef. I can use the Salisbury gravy on that too. We bake off more fresh bread and I make more cinnamon bus for desert along with some more pies.

Dad comes in when a lot of the stuff is done and gives me a big hug. “Hi Angel.”

“Hey Daddy.” I hug him back and kiss him on the cheek. “What’s up?”

“I’m just going to pick Hunter up from school and figured you might like some more driving time.”

“Yeah, things won’t be that busy and we’ll be back before the supper rush right/”

“Oh yeah that won’t be a problem.”

I tell the girls were I’m going leaving holly in charge of the kitchen and stuff and we head out to go and pick Hunter up from school. I’m actually driving, I passed my beginner’s or learners permit two days ago and I need dad in the car while I’m driving or someone else with a license but I can’t drive with Hunter in the car. That’s alright I can drive there at least. It’s an actually quite a lot of fun. I like driving and once I get my own full permit I’ll get myself a cute little ride like maybe one of the new Volkswagen bugs or a Kia or something good but girly at the same time.

I pull up to the school and I get out and wait until I see the kids start getting out. I wave to Hunter who’s coming out with some friends all talking and chattering like pre-teen girls do. I can’t help but smile at that. She’s getting the chance to be herself a whole lot earlier than I did and I’m one of the lucky ones. She see’s me and waves back and see’s dad and this huge daddy’s girl smile lights up her face. She runs over and hugs me around my middle and yells. “Jenna!” it puts a lump in my throat…

It happens so fast…

This 80’s red Camero driving past…

The Window rolls down and I see the barrels slip out from behind the tint…

Aimed at Hunter?!

No!

Not! My little sister!

I turn her away from them and cover her and I feel this pain as I feel the impacts into me…

Kids are screaming…Hunter is screaming…I fall down…