The main event - The Ball and all the confusion. A chance to go away for a weekend and say goodbye to a dear friend.

Toni and Kerry went into the wine bar for a drink to kill the time before Janet arrived, they had been sitting just chatting and watching the Friday crowd wander through the bar area when one of the guys drinking at the bar came over and started to chat to them both. Toni just carried on as if it was quite normal and made suitable comments about his job and how good it must be, not realising that she was being chatted up for a date. When the question came she choked on her drink and went bright red, Kerry had to rescue her quickly without causing hurt to the very attractive young man.

“My niece has a young man back home and I think he would get rather mad if she accepted your invitation” she said trying not to sound matronly or pompous. He stood wished them good afternoon and went back to the bar.

“What were you thinking” asked Kerry as soon as he had gone. Toni made a bashful face and asked what did she mean.

“I just wanted to know how it felt to be wanted and seen as attractive by anyone” said Toni glancing back to the bar.

We call it a core need for every human being, the need to be wanted and valued or desired, to have external approval of who we are and what we have to offer. It can been seen in lots of things we do either at work or play or even in serving others we all need the acceptance of others to prove that we are worth something.

Toni turned back to her drink and said “haven’t you wondered what it would be like to be wanted like that?”

Kerry had to think about that one as it messed with her logical head and caused too many questions that she did not want to seriously look at. “Have another drink” said Kerry to avoid the question and both of them knew the answer they would each have said if they had been honest enough.

Janet arrived just after work had finished and joined them for drinks, neither person mentioning the cute guy. Toni stayed in the wine bar area while Janet and Kerry went to get ready, they would take at least thirty minutes before Toni could go up and start to get ready. Toni entered the suite just after Janet had showered and changed clothes ready for her makeup. Toni looked at Janet and suggested that she make some simple changes to her look that would outline her face more and give real emphasis to her eyes, just the thing Paul had tried to tell her. She listened to Toni and did what she said, to Paul’s surprise, the difference was quite pronounced and made her look much younger.

Meanwhile Kerry had finished dressing in her evening gown, the same one from the ballet complete with corset and stockings. Time for her makeup session to begin as Toni ran into the bathroom for a shower, clothes lying everywhere. Janet said how she found Toni very easy to get on with and that the night should be better than she had thought it would be when they first talked about the event. An hour later and three very attractive girls stepped into the lift and pressed the button for the banquet floor. The door opened and a sea of faces and colour flooded into their eyes, men in frocks, girls in tuxedo’s people in between the two, not sure where they now sat gender wise but taking part in the charity event that would be with them for many years to come.

Kerry found a seating plan and their table number before heading into the cocktail area to meet the other company guys that had been co-opted or pushed into coming. Sadly most of them looked very miserable to be forced into skirts and even the girls looked only partly comfortable with their changes to suits and ties. Bill on the other hand had made a real effort to go with the flow and had a good wig on and a solid makeup job, although it was much too white for the bright lights and cameras. Looking at Kerry he missed the fact that Janet was next to her until Kerry had to introduce her to him again. Small talk and gossip was the order of the day as some people felt very vulnerable in drag as they put it.

Bill had to make a small presentation to the winner of each floor and then to the overall winner so he stood up on a small stage area and blew into the microphone like someone that never used a mic does. He welcomed everyone on behalf of our company and hoped that the night would be a success before receiving the envelopes from the PR team that was overseeing the night. One by one he went through the floor numbers and called each winner out for their award then it came to the accounting floor.

He stopped after looking at the winners name, “accountants are supposed to be dull, colourless and boring according to Monty Python but the winner has blown that idea away this week”. He looked around to find Kerry and then said “floor seven winner is Kerry Brown” Kerry stepped onto the stage at the height of the applause, “ Well done Kerry, I did tell you to make sure you did not win” said Bill as he handed her a small plaque for the event.

The overall winner was going to get a prize for two nights away and full pampering, makeover and beauty treatment for the wife. The crowd hushed as the envelope was passed to Bill who stood there reading the card, happy that it wasn’t Kerry. “This years winner is from the graphics section, Toni Reading” Toni shook with surprise as she had not expected to stand out for anything. As she got the award and prize from the CEO, Bill told everyone that Toni was selected partly because of the way she got behind the event after being initially cautious but then threw her whole self into the fun. Little did they know how much she threw into it and how much fun it had been for her, it was a make or break situation in her life at this point in time.

Sarah and Mary arrived during the presentations so came over to meet Kerry, Janet and Toni with drinks in their hands. Mary was obviously very taken with the presentation of the girls and Kerry saw her looking very closely at her makeup before asking Sarah if Toni and Kerry were really guys or had she made a horrible mistake. Janet stepped over to her and started to chat so she felt better relating to a real woman, she was very surprised at how good the girls looked and had expected more of a drag queen image than a very attractive group of women. Sarah felt a little bit out of it having to dress within the restraints that Mary placed on her and she said as much to Toni and Kerry as they sipped their cocktails and swirled the little umbrellas then carefully chatted about the week they had just had together.

The highlight had been the Wednesday night meal together and Jacky’s house in the hills, who arrived just as they finished talking about her. She kissed Toni and the other girls before being introduced to Janet and Mary, the small group finished their drinks and walked through to the table in the ball room. Janet stayed close to Mary and made sure she was feeling ok as the entertainment started and a clown came out to the sounds of plates crashing and fire crackers going off on stage. It was the charity CEO who had quickly got changed and made-up to act as the MC for the night. He talked about the event and the special people that had contributed so much in time and effort to make it a success then the footy stars that had brought their media following and the members of parliament that came along for the free drinks but had left their dresses at home for once. The crowd cheered at the last comment since none of them had gone to any effort to dress up.

The food flowed during the night as did the drinks, it was going to be a heavy night and the corset Kerry wore would be straining a lot by the end of it. The girls sat close to each other and their partners and Jacky could see the bond that was building between them, even more than during the Wednesday afternoon that she met them. Kerry stood up and picked up her purse and asked if anyone needed a toilet break to freshen up, Mary froze on the spot as the consequences became very real to her forcing Sarah to pass.

Toni stood and said “sure lets go and see the ladies room” and they walked off arm in arm. The hotel had signs on the toilets declaring that the persons using these facilities may not present as the signs showed or in fact be the same gender as the sign, a public disclosure notice to save lawsuits later. Being fair, the hotel had allocated separate toilet facilities for specific gender usage and had maps showing where they could be found.

Inside it was hard to tell who was who and who was what so Kerry did her business and then went to the mirrors to make sure everything was in place and looked good. A few ladies made comments about how good she looked and nothing about her using the wrong rooms, even though they had all seen her during the week and also when she got the floor award. Toni came out and followed the leader to the same comments and gentle touches that girls do to each other as a sign of bonding. Much better than killing animals and blowing things up that men had to do to prove they had what it took to survive. When they returned Mary had composed herself again and Sarah returned from the gents, not happy to use the ladies room for Mary’s sake.

After the meal and several short items from celebrity guests the music started and the dance floor was gently lit up with candle stands and smoke machines to entice the non dancers to give it a go. Kerry always promised Janet one dance a night and any more was bonus so Janet was very surprised when Kerry took the lead and stood up ready to dance. Was it the music the clothes the company or just Kerry finding herself, Janet didn’t care the only question was who was going to lead? Kerry lead and Janet enjoyed a slow waltz around the room followed by a slightly faster one. Kerry obviously enjoyed the dancing far more than Paul ever did, it must have been the flowing gown and the fact that others watched closely.

After the second dance Janet asked to sit down as her back was still sore from standing all day, to Kerry’s surprise Bill came over and asked for the next dance. This really shocked her as dancing with the boss was not seen as good career move for a guy, even one that looked really cute and wore a dress. Bill lead and Kerry tried to compensate for gender changes but to little success and many others saw her fumble the footsteps and tread on his toes. It was then that Bill said how proud he was to see Kerry getting so involved in the event and sacrificing her own feelings for the better good. Little did he know, Kerry would have done this every week given the chance and along with no risk of losing her job. The dance finished and Bill returned her to the table thanked Janet for the opportunity to dance with Kerry and went back to his own table. Staff meetings would be strange for the next Monday or month or year.

The dancing went on until late and the girls all got asked to dance by a variety of work colleagues both male and female as the gender divide was greatly blurred tonight and nobody seemed to care very much. Finally they decided it was winding down and Janet invited them back to the room for coffees before going home, always the host even when away from home. They got into the lift and headed for the penthouse viewing platform and some fresh air, a quick look at the lights then down a few floors to the room and coffees that had been ordered from room service.

The group had somehow found enough in common to make the whole night a great success without the others things happening. Jacky said how she felt proud to know the three girls that had not known each other a week ago and now seemed to be close friends and the help they had been to Toni. Mary also shared how she was very nervous about coming and the media images of the TG community, since clearly the three of them had something the others didn’t have, the drive to be the best they could and enjoy the chance to be free for a week. Sarah asked what it would take to have another night out together and a meal. Jacky then made the offer of her place, if everyone could help with the food we could have a small dinner party and stay over for the weekend, two nights away. The decision was going to be with Mary and Sarah as they had children to look after, Sarah suggested her sister who had four kids anyway so two more made no difference in his opinion. They chose a date in three weeks and Mary offered to co-ordinate the food buying and menu if the girls took care of the drinks, activities and chocolates.

The party broke up around 1 am and the others hired a taxi to get them home while Janet and Kerry just closed the door and collapsed on the settee. They slept well into the morning before dialling down for breakfast in bed and a late check out and then a drive home. Kerry had forgotten to pack any clothes for the trip home so she had to put back on the clothes she had worn to work on Friday and the makeup and jewellery. The front desk clerk gave a funny look as she booked Kerry and Janet out using Paul’s credit card until another staff member told her about the dinner last night, then she had to have a closer look to believe her eyes. Kerry showed her the floor award and thanked the staff for all of their help with the bags and clothes last night. The car had been brought out front by the valet and the bags loaded into the back of the car, Kerry stepped up and got the keys as the valet said “have a nice day ladies.” As they drove home Janet asked Kerry what she thought was the best part about the week at work and what was the worst thing.

Kerry thought for a while then said “the best thing was being able to talk with the other girls and know they understood”. The worst thing for the week took longer to think of and she wanted to be careful before saying anything. The week at work was such a high that coming down from it and returning to “normal” meant a round of grief that was never easy to handle. Kerry knew that it would take at least a week to get over the intense feelings and satisfaction of living as Kerry 24 x 7. The only way she handled it was by looking forward to the next time as Kerry the next time out of the prison.

The next week at work was a fairly unreal atmosphere as everyone tried to return to the roles they normally filled but could not forget the fun they had. The company staff meeting was going to be hard for Paul as the hair and nails still had some signs of the makeover. He had trimmed the nails and changed the hairstyle but it still looked fairly androgynous and the eye brows got raked backwards to make them look bigger. Bill started the staff meeting by congratulating Paul for his energy in working with the clients and taking such a huge risk. The others just joked about his legs being better than some of their clients or their ex-wives while one of the girls repeated her request for the breast forms. Paul never saw the photos until they went on the email newsletter but they all looked very good and he asked for copies.

When Paul finally made it to the client site the morning tea break was just finishing but several of the girls came and talked to him about the impact he made last week and said that he could join them for lunch anytime. Sean came down during the day and so did Tony, both of them showing a little too much female than they wanted to due to the conflict in who they were and who they wanted to be. Tony asked about drinks after work so he could talk to both of them about a small problem he had and needed their input so they booked Wednesday straight after work. Gary made sure he congratulated Paul on a fine effort especially since he was not part of the organization. By Wednesday the place had settled down except for the photo wall that was created in the foyer as part of the final wrap up for the fundraiser. The three girls featured quite heavily in several shots and the group shot was one they each requested for their own collections.

Wednesday came around quickly and as soon as work had finished the three went out for a quick bite to eat and a few drinks. Tony took awhile to come to the point but it was obviously quite an emotional thing for him to talk about as his voice was very shaky and he had to stop often before he could get it all out. He had battled with his feeling for many years and never really had any success talking to others about it but the last week had been so liberating to him and finishing was doubly hard as he had no one at home to talk with. Tony wanted to know what they thought about transitioning at work, the sex reassignment surgery could only be completed after living a full year as a woman. He had thought about the whole thing and could not come up with any reason why he should not make the change to what he had always wanted to be, a woman.

Kerry asked about the incident in the bar on Friday night and how he felt about the whole issue of men and dating. Sean had not known about it but thought it was better to keep quiet and ask later. Tony went through the range of options, single, lesbian, bi-sexual, and heterosexual, which it would be if he made a complete transition. Sean and Paul just sat and let Tony talk it through before they put in their two cents worth. It appeared that it would be the best time to make the jump since the last week had prepared everyone for the possibility of transitioning at work. Management would be supportive and the union already had a general policy of helping GLBT policy formation in the workplace. They offered ongoing support for him and recommended that he speak with the HR department quickly and get a timeframe for transitioning.

They both knew the old joke, what is the difference between a cross dresser and a transsexual? the answer being, about two years. It was a theme that had a large following on the chat forums and the sex question was one that caused the most controversy and discussion. The workplace policies had limited impact as the personal approach was by far the best way to go, an employee letter followed by support from the managers and HR department would help but looking like you fitted in was essential and Toni had proved she looked good. When Paul got home he told Janet all about Tony’s problem and how he would need supporting through the year.

Janet waited until they had got ready for bed before bringing up the obvious question, “would you want to transition” she asked. This was a question he had waited for her to ask every since she found out about Kerry and one that never got clearer in his head. To say yes could mean an end to their marriage, to say no would be a lie so he convinced himself that he had no firm idea. The concept was always enticing given how much he enjoyed “Kerry Time” but the loss of the love of Janet would be too high a loss to bear. If he could transition and keep Janet then he would see that as the best of both worlds but would Janet want to live in a lesbian relationship even with Paul. It was very late before the lights got turned off without the question being truly answered.

Sean had a very similar discussion when he got home but had to be more careful with his answers due to his wife’s tacit support as opposed to the agro she had been giving him for the last five years since she found him dressed in her clothes one night. He had been given chance to continue at home but never when she was around as long as he never changed his male appearance. When the three girls talked about their feelings it was Sarah that had the least to say about herself, it was as if things were just below the surface and she knew that pain would be involved. She had guidelines and rules and had agreed to stay within them even though it was screwing up her peace of mind.

During the night Paul remembered about Kate from the cosmetics shop and thought that being post-op she would be able to share with Toni some valuable insights. The next morning Paul sent an email to Tony asking about meeting Kate next Wednesday after work if Kate was free. The response came before Paul could finish checking his other private emails, yes please and do I have to wait till Wednesday. Paul sent an email directly to Kate outlining the situation with Toni and asked if she would be free for dinner on Wednesday evening, he CC’d Toni as well. Kate responded within a few hours and made one stipulation that Toni come and not Tony, if she had problems now then she would not be even close to making a transition. Kerry loved the idea, another night out to enjoy herself even if it was just to help Toni.

Tony had agreed to let Paul change at his place after work since he lived near the CBD and it was close to the restaurant Kate had chosen. On the Wednesday Paul arrived around 5:30pm with bag and clothes expecting to see Tony in normal work clothes but Toni had been ready since 4 o’clock, she had taken an early minute due to the excitement. Toni was like a little girl going on a date, giggly, nervous, talkative and also very very excited about what was finally happening for her. Kerry shaved applied her makeup and got dressed into a pair of jeans, boots, and green sweater with a broad belt and necklace to match. The look was casual and very respectable for a more mature woman that Kerry was rapidly becoming. Toni showed Kerry the letter she had written to the employees and the one to the manager in HR. The HR one had already been delivered and the other was ready to insert into the email system as soon as she was ready to start the transition. Kerry was shocked at the speed of Toni’s decisions not realizing how often she had planned this time.

A casual stroll down the road and they arrived just before Kate who kissed Kerry and complimented her on the casual look with the hairstyle and nails still very visible. Kerry introduced Toni who by this time was nearly wetting herself with excitement and Kate could tell it was going to be many question before the night was over. The girls talked for ages and eventually the waiter asked if they wanted anything else as they wanted to close up, the girls apologized paid the bill and left, still talking. The next day Toni sent Kate and Kerry an email asking about repeating the Wednesday night next week after she had talked to the HR department and management group. They both accepted and asked if Sarah could come as well since she had very limited time for herself.

On Friday Paul was standing in the kitchen area making a cup of tea when one of the women came in to make a cuppa as well. She seemed to hesitate until they were the only two in the kitchen and then asked if Paul and Tony had enjoyed their meal on Wednesday. Paul just looked at her wondering what to say and who else she had spoken to, this was the first time Kerry had been spotted outside of the known events and thought it could hurt her employment chances. Seeing the concern in Paul’s face the woman assured him that she had neither told anyone nor would in the future as she thought private lives should stay just that “Private”. Paul was still a little shocked but thanked her and went back to his desk without the cuppa, which he had to go back for.

The woman was just leaving and had to ask Paul “do you want to know why I won’t say anything?” Paul didn’t have to wait as she talked briefly about her son and “his problem” as she called it, a young lad trying to come to grips with his own sexuality and the battle within.

The interchange caused Paul to feel very insecure about some of the things he had done over the last few months and the impact on his life. It actually took several days for the doubts and feelings to settle down and it was only when Toni asked him “What part of yourself are you ashamed of?” and the realisation that she had to love herself first.

Toni had chosen a date to transition at work and it would be three weeks after the fundraiser finished and also the week after the combined weekend they had all planned to share at Jacky’s place in the hills. It would be a fitting end to Tony and a good welcome to Toni, Kate was also invited to go along and bring a partner if she wanted to.

The Wednesday evening session came around quickly and the three girls met at Toni’s place after work and again walked down to the restaurant to meet Kate after she finished work. The waiters greeted them all again, remembering them from the week before and asking if they would be staying until closing time with a smile on their faces. The girls laughed and said only if the service was good and they kept the wine flowing. Kate met Sarah for the first time and made sure she sat next to Toni knowing that she would have more questions to ask. As the meal was delivered the number of question that Toni had was surprisingly few so Kate asked her why she didn’t have many things to talk about. Toni talked for a while about making a choice to move ahead and was feeling very much at peace with all the decisions she had made including the date of transitioning since it was only a few days away.

It was Sarah that had the most questions for Kate and Toni, she wanted to know about how friends and family had reacted when Kate announced her decision and how many had stopped talking to her. Kate was a little subdued on this matter and told the girls about what true friends did and how others who could not cope stopped calling her or started making excuses for meeting, very few actually made any negative comments apart from one of her brothers that shouted about being gay and weird and not normal. He had taken two years before he spoke to her again and even now they had limited time together and only at family gatherings. The night finished early as they all had two more days of work and then a good weekend together.

Mary had planned a full menu for the weekend including brunch on Sunday morning at a local eatery, which would be followed by a picnic in the national park before going home. They all drove up there after work and Jacky showed them to their own rooms which had been decorated with flowers, fresh towels and chocolates on the bed. Kate arrived with her partner John who at this rate was going to be the only person dressed as a male surrounded by seven girls of mixed heritage. The girls each took time to unpack their clothes and layout their makeup before showering, shaving and getting dressed. It was planned to be casual on Friday night with drinks and cheese before a meal of salads and cold meats followed by cheesecake and dessert wine.

Mary appeared more relaxed compared to the last time they had met for dinner and she enjoyed taking control of the food and presentation which Jacky graciously let her do. As they each came down into the lounge Jacky handed them a drink and a special envelope containing a red card and a key to the front door. She explained that the red cards could be used at anytime they wanted to pass on any questions that got asked, this was going to be a safe weekend for everyone. Kerry had chosen her jeans, high boots and tight green/brown sweater with belt and matching necklace that she had worn out to dinner one Wednesday. Toni had chosen a short denim skirt with gold stretch sleeveless t-shirt and sneakers while Sarah wore a pair of light brown slacks and chocolate brown jumper and flats.

They all relaxed over dinner and dessert as the pressures of the week faded away and they started talking about the plans for the weekend. Saturday was going to be time to shop in one of the hills tourist towns and then relax or play tennis or even swim in the pool. A pair of bathers was not something any of the girls had thought about yet but there again it was an ideal place to look at it. Kerry didn’t think that a bikini would be appropriate without losing more weight but a one piece could be a consideration if she could find one without creating a stir in the shop. They all sat around talking about work, the fundraiser that had brought them each together and how they looked forward to their times together.

The thing they all appreciated was the chance to talk with someone else that understood what they each felt. Kerry also said that she enjoyed having “Her Time” where she could be herself while knowing that Janet supported or at least accepted the other side of who she was. Mary asked Janet how she could accept all the things that Kerry did without feeling hurt, Kerry chose to be quiet as she also wanted to know why Janet had accepted so much in the last few months. Janet told them about the bond of being married for so long and how she had a friend that she could talk to irrespective of what clothes he or she had on. The years of not knowing had initially hurt her but the thought of losing Paul forever was too great a pain to consider, Kerry was also a great shopper and made sure that she got to try on the latest fashion items even if she found them hard to take on board at times. Her makeup techniques had also improved and also her sense of feeling secure as the only risk to her marriage had been disarmed. The talking went on long into the night over a glass or two of Baileys or Port.

Saturday was a late start as the girls came down to breakfast wearing shorts and tops but with little makeup but still all looking very different to the normal male shells they had left behind at home. They had a few bits of toast or cereal and juice followed by black tea or coffee after all of the wine they had drunk last night. Janet and Mary had gone for a walk early in the day and came into the kitchen carrying some fresh flowers from a nearby property. They all sat around deciding which town to drive to so they could do some shopping and go for a walk, the group decision was split so two couples went one way and the other two the other way. Mary and Janet had chosen a town with a larger shopping centre and clothes shops as Kerry had mentioned buying a pair of bathers to go swimming in. Toni and Kate had decided on a smaller town and walking around a tourist area rather than shopping. It was agreed that since each couple had a front door key the only stipulation was dinner preparation at five, otherwise it was up to them to enjoy the time.

While Kerry drove the car with Sarah in the front, Janet and Mary sat in the back chatting about kids and work, Sarah just enjoyed being out and having Mary so happy for once. The Target store was in the centre of town and hence they parked in the car park and headed off to investigate the town centre. It was a fairly decent size town with several smallish shops doing a good trade for Saturday morning, a few tourist shops and cafes that had people in them having breakfast. As they walked around there were no laughs or pointing just people relaxing and minding their own business. Mary and Janet had found a sweet shop and entered to check out the offerings of chocolate and sugar, Kerry and Sarah trying hard to resist and lose weight so they could look better in their summer outfits in only a few weeks.

After a walk around the town they headed into Target and the swimsuit section, Janet took the lead and chose a pair that she thought would look OK for Kerry, not quite what Kerry had in mind but very comfortable. Mary was tempted to pick a pair for Sarah, at least they had more colour and less material than Janet’s choice thought Sarah. Kerry and Sarah had been looking at bikinis trying to make a choice from flimsy bits of cloth that would not cover their extra parts, good idea but no way this side of an operation they agreed. Back to one piece bathers they said and looked at the girls choices, Kerry deciding that more colour and less material, more like Sarah’s pair. They both selected a matching pair and headed into the change rooms, which luckily consisted of individual stalls which they chose next to each other. A glance at the sign about wearing underwear when trying on bathers was noted, not that they intended on removing their gaffs.

The bathers fitted without letting much flesh fall out so they got dressed and headed back out of the change rooms to find the women who had been looking at the new season’s specials. The style was going to be simple designs and single coloured tops that could be layered to add variety, easy to mix and match but also quick to go out of fashion. Kerry picked up a summer dress with small belt in the same material, red and orange flowers on a white background with short sleeves. The dress had a flair that would make it stand out from her legs and swirl around as she walked but at $129 it was more than she had wanted to spend. With a small white woollen jacket it could be used even after dark in summer but that would be an extra $49 and of course a new pair of shoes and handbag to match would bring it to over $240. They each left with just bathers and headed for a coffee shop in the main street and some lunch.

The others had found a pleasant town with shops in the main street and no multinational supermarkets to drain the local economy or business owners that had supported the community for years. Likewise they found themselves sitting in a café for lunch and ended up talking for over two hours before they decided to return to the house. By the time they got back to the house the others had changed and were swimming in the pool, Kerry and Sarah in matching bathers. The girls all sat around the pool after swimming and enjoyed just soaking up the sunshine and talked about shopping and the towns they had gone to. The afternoon had just seemed to vanish as Mary looked at her watch and said it was time to prepare the evening meal and she needed some help, Janet and Kerry offered so headed off to the kitchen while the others laid out the table. The menu was going to be a prawn salad entrée, followed by Thai red curry on a bed of rice and then instant crá¨me caramels and whipped cream.

The evening meal was planned as formal wear so after preparing the meal and room everyone disappeared to their rooms to get ready, Kerry had bought a new gown made from dark green silk and lace that she found at the op-shop saying that she would wear it to the dinner event. As people came down to the dining room Jacky handed them a corsage for the girls and a button hole for John. The table had been bathed in gentle candles and a centre piece of eight long stem roses, around the room was subdued lighting and music that was loud enough to hear but soft enough to talk over. At one end there was a small painting easel with pictures of Tony through all of his lifetime from childhood until Saturday afternoon. They were served with glasses of wine and small pieces of cheese as they waited for the last person to come down, Tony.

Jacky declared that the evening would be in two parts, a farewell to Tony and a welcoming of Toni. Tony walked into the room dressed in a dark grey suit with white shirt and bow tie, a button hole flower being pinned on his lapel. The meal started with the prawn salad as Jacky started with stories of Tony’s childhood and his growing up, stories of school plays where he had roles as Angels and girls. His life as a university student and the pranks they got up to including student reviews where the entire cast was male and played both male and female parts, no prizes for guessing what Tony played all the time.

The main course was served along with wine and breads and of course the continuing stories from Jacky about Tony’s early working life and the ultimate discovery of his transgenderism and the pain of struggling with discovery and rejection at work and at home. The ridicule through the professional ranks as his employer made it known to others that he was no longer working with them due to doubtful lifestyle choices. The family found it easy to understand his problem but coming to grips with his choice was difficult for many of them including his brother. The usual drag queen stereotype comments and questions of his sexuality followed as he tried to talk about the problem in a personal way, it was something that he felt rather than needed psychological treatment for. Jacky talked about her own doubts and fears with the news until she sat and asked Tony exactly what he wanted to be, he had answered “the woman I know I was meant to be.” Jacky said that she loved her brother and had seen the hurt but also the hope that had grown in the last year and especially the last couple of months. Tony excused himself as Jacky went into the kitchen to bring out the desserts and dessert wine. While Tony was absent the group ate their dessert and talked about all the things that Tony and Toni had done over the years.

It was at least 30 minutes before there was a knock at the door, Jacky asked everyone to stand and welcome Toni into the world. She wore a stunning white gown that flowed like a wedding dress but without the train, as she entered they all turned to admire the dress and could not miss the absolute joy on her face. One by one they took time to give her a hug or kiss and welcome her to the dinner table. They had agreed to say goodbye to Tony and welcome Toni along with offering their support for the coming year of real life test and then the SRS if she decided to go on with it. It was now only 38 hours until the change began in earnest but it had already started as far as this group was concerned and especially Toni.

The party went on into the early hours of the night and as they all sat around Kerry got time to talk with Toni, the joy was obvious but so was her concern about being rejected at work on Monday. The pain from the last employer was still very real and close to the surface but she hoped that this time it would be different. Kerry could easily identify with the hurt from previous employers, her own pain was normally just below the surface, in fact these last few months had been different and she only thought about it when prompted. Not only had the organization been prepared with information and the letter to each employee that had been sent out on Wednesday but they also had very well defined policies to protect people. The email informed people that if they had any questions they could talk to their managers, HR department or Tony. There was nothing they could do for her except be there to talk and support her when the times got hard.

On Sunday morning they went down to the kitchen in dribs and drabs wearing various types of PJ’s, nighties and t-shirts to drink tea or coffee and just sit around. They had planned a late breakfast at a nearby town but wanted to just take their time and relax so it was nearly eleven o’clock before they got to the café. Kerry wore the jeans again with a white tank top covered by a blue denim jacket and high heel shoes that showed her red toenails that matched her fingernails. Around her neck was a new necklace in the shape of a heart with small diamonds on them to make it sparkle, the matching earrings completed a casual look that was dressed up for chic. The others had also made an effort to keep it simple but still enjoy the fun of dressing up and going out.

The café was large enough that they could have a decent sized table and still be away from others for some privacy while having a good view of the hills and everyone walking around the town. Brunch, as it was rapidly becoming, was relaxing and apart from John the girls all chose wisely, low calorie count stuff such as yoghurt, fruit salad, muesli and juices followed by tea and coffee. Kerry was far more concerned with her waistline now that she was out of prison than Paul had ever been.

As the lunch time crowd started filtering into the café it was time for another walk to check out the township, it was small enough that it would only take an hour if they walked slowly and none of them had any reason to rush. Toni had chosen a very summery dress which bounced around as she walked down the road, the last day as Tony and not a visible care in the world although inside she was starting to get nervous. They took their time and checked out the local antique stores and even a second hand clothes shop that was surprisingly good quality, but none of the girls felt like shopping for once.

Hillside towns each had a special flavour, this one was more olde world artefacts like the antiques and clothes that had real appeal for the new retro look that was being sought after. The small group wondered along in twos, threes or by themselves, each person comfortable with who they were and what they were doing until they reached the end of the street where the cars had been left. The plan was to go into one of the national parks and have a picnic but everyone was feeling very contented after a late breakfast so they opted for returning to the “Manor” as they had nicknamed it, the picnic could wait.

Back at the house they thought about packing their cases ready for returning but the resistance was too much so they just left them. The three girls had enjoyed themselves so much, in fact they all had enjoyed the time of chatting, eating and just relaxing without the pressures of the work they all knew was waiting for them back home in the inboxes of all of their computers. Jacky was a photographer and designer and due to a good work situation could schedule days off without any trouble, Toni being a graphic artist had done some work for her on a freelance basis and was finding more work outside the workplace. They had often talked about going into business together put had not found anything that could make money and give the lifestyle they each wanted.

“What about the B&B as a financial stop gap” suggested Kerry, or was that Paul’s brain working in his normal way? There were so many B&B’s in the area they had decided it would be hard to find a niche.

Sarah suddenly said “I would come back anytime if I could bring my clothes” causing much frowning on Sarah's face.

The others sat there just chuckling but then Toni stood up and left the room, returning shortly with a drawing book and pencils as if he had an artistic attack coming on. What about “Tranny Manor, as you have called the place, a time away from the pressure where you can be you” she said.

Kerry told them about the photo shoot in Sydney and the fun she had finding out what she looked like, Sarah had always wanted to do the same but had never had the nerve to follow through. Jacky was suddenly energized and started talking about the racks of clothes she had accumulated over the years that she could not throw out, the closet full of shoes and makeup from photo shoots she had worked on. Janet and Mary also said how many clothes they had acquired but never worn or simply changed their minds about wearing after getting them home. An hour later and Toni had finished a picture of the group all sitting around with an advertising splash over the top saying “for the manor born, a place where you can find yourself”. It was an interesting exercise and one day it could come true but it was not the group's decision to make.

By three o’clock they decided that a picnic in the park was not going to happen but one in the gardens would be easier to handle so grabbing the picnic rugs and hampers they went around to the tennis court and set up the picnic.

The food was laid out as Jacky brought out the tennis rackets and balls, “mixed couples” she said, “ain’t that the truth” laughed Sarah. Janet and Kerry grabbed the rackets and challenged Sarah and Mary to a few quick games, none of them had played tennis for years let alone in a skirt. It was definitely a bare feet game as bodies fell on the lawn surface and crashed into the net, plenty of laughter and some really bad score keeping. Food was almost an afterthought as they just enjoyed the early summer sun and warmth late into the afternoon before packing up and going inside. Each person packed their bags and went back into the lounge area carrying a small gift, no one wanted to leave but they all knew the next day was going to be full on for Toni. Kerry called them all together and took time to thank Jacky for the great weekend and allowing them to relax and enjoy their time together. She handed a small gift to Jacky then one by one they each gave her a gift, a hug and kiss. The time had been great and for Sarah had been the first time she had spent more than a day en-femme, one that would be hard to forget.

The drive home was only short but Janet and Kerry talked all the way as they had had little time alone during the weekend and Janet was missing her time with Paul. Janet wandered if Paul had changed his mind about being Kerry full time after talking with Toni and Sarah so much over the weekend. The thought was always there in Paul’s mind but the negatives always seemed to outweigh the positives, today was not a good day to ask the question though and made half feeble comments that may have eased Janet’s mind, or not. The next day was going to be hard as Kerry came to terms with not being visible while Toni made a major step forward with her transition. Toni had been taking mail order hormones for the last six months but would be going on prescription hormones and much greater strength as the doctor monitored the changes. The usual testosterone blockers and progesterone and oestrogen boosters to thin her waist and reduce body hair while helping breast growth although implants would be done early in the new year. Facial surgery would make some small changes to hairline, cheekbones and jaw line but that would not be until late in the year due to the cost.

Some of the members of Toni’s section had decided to support her by going to work on Monday in the same outfits they wore for the fundraiser without letting her know. As Toni arrived for work they had formed a guard of honour for her to enter the work area and others had come along to show their support, it was going to be much better than she had expected. The managers came around during the next week to demonstrate acceptance but also to make sure there would be no claims of harassment from Toni.

By the end of the week Toni was feeling very relaxed in her time at work but not so sure about her living area, it was fairly confined and she had no real support apart from the girls and Jacky and felt she needed more. Toni called Kate to see if she could have a chat about her feelings, she could only make it after work on Saturday but promised to come around just after 2pm. Kerry phoned her after work on Friday and asked how the week had finished, Toni could not hold it in and started pouring out her fears and doubts over the phone. Kerry suggested that she come around for dinner and bring a change of clothes if she wanted to stay overnight then called Janet to say that they had a guest for dinner. This is what offering support would come down to for the next year as Toni made the changes in her life and living conditions.

The next two weeks got better for Toni as work settled back into the normal pace of project meetings, production deadlines and programme delivery. The graphics department was geared for Christmas campaigns but already had the midsummer decline campaign in the planning phase. Toni was still feeling unsure about her unit so when Jacky made the suggestion of her moving in it took around one second to think and accept. The rental income would also give her a cash boost to pay for the Gender Reassignment Surgery (GRS) and Facial Feminisation Surgery (FFS) as well as the recovery period after the surgery. Toni would pay a small rent and half of all bills but the cashstream would make transitioning much easier for her along with the companionship from Jacky.

As Christmas approached the girls had a Wednesday night meal together after work with Kate at their normal café. Jacky had made another offer of using her place for a weekend retreat just prior to Christmas, a chance for a celebration. They each called home on their mobiles and asked their partners if they had anything else planned before the group agreed on the weekend before the 25th. Toni had already sold her unit and would have moved in by the time the weekend came around so it would be Sarah, Mary, Janet and Kerry for the stay over as Kate had to work all weekend until Christmas eve. The rest of the night was all just talk about how Toni was going with the new hormones, had her breasts started changing, was anything shrinking etc. Her moods had been wilder than normal and she had found herself crying while watching movies on tele but nothing unexpected.

To be Continued .... A new girl comes forth

Please let me know what you think of this, good bad or ugly. I promise not to cry for too long - Kerry