IN MY STRIVING...
I had built a mental picture, based on my dream
And it looked awful high, standing there on the beach
It looked to me like an idol... a goal just a bit out of reach.
The feeling was incredible, and I thought I would burst.
When I found that my idol, was but nothing, a single tall stone.
All but for me... alone, on that long long beach
As you both showed me, from the mountain top
Of which you not just helped, but took me up
I could see my idol, way down there on that beach.
Your caring help, exceeded my wildest of reach.
All I wanted was to dance, for the joy in my heart!
And yes, I saw in your eyes the concern, you now felt
The state I was in, with what the clothes were doing
And the joy you had just added, I was near to exploding
And far too giddy...to so much as speak!
And then along came a man, out of my dreams.
What was the sky now... I had just left the earth!
And found myself faced, with all the cosmos
Holding its hand, out right there, within my reach.
I took it with joy, and jumped with both feet
And found myself falling, into a depth, that was to deep
But before I could panic, and cower in fright
He showed me weren't falling, but only in flight.
And to my wonder, not just a flight of fancy...
As whatever I saw, that my heart could endure
Was mine forever and ever to keep.
And some things were painful, to the touch at first
It only made the pleasure, given, so much more a treat.
But now it seems, the farther I reach
The pain is becoming, not worth the treat.
YES something is wrong now, and each time I dress
It increases exponentially, the pain I must bear...
So blame me for trying, and wanting too much
When I am reaching for something that's worth
All that pain and I accepting, for my eyes the treat
Is worth all the pain I'm likely to reap...
But I must catch it and hold it soon
For each time, that I reach, for this one,
It gets further, and my threshold is peaked.
I feel things slipping... away, I'm hesitating...again to reach
For that of which I know, that alone in reaching
Way out, much too far, then I will actually be falling
From a height, that's so high, into a hole, that's too deep
And if this should happen, then may my soul, the lord keep
For I'll not survive, such a perilous leap
So if I should die, always, bear in mind
I will always remember, till the end of all time
All those who taught me to reach
It's better this way I implore you
Than to stand alone with the idol
On that long, long, empty beach.
So please for me
Don't weep
Pattie B.
1987
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