in my dreams, I am not a nice person

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what would you do if a dream told you you were a bad person?

This happened to me last night.

It started as what would make an interesting story on Big Closet, with me as a worker in a palace who switches bodies with a princess.

But then things got dark.

the switch is undone, but the result was that the princess got to know the real me, and didn't like what she saw, and showed me the darkness I try to keep hidden.

the dream ended with me telling the queen that I had tried to warn them that I am not the huggy fuzzy person i try to pretend I am, and that for her daughter's future safety I had to go away.

I woke with the profound sense that the dream was truth - I am a much worse person than I try to project, and I'd be doing my friends a favor if I went away.

sighs ...

Comments

Who knows what eeeevil lurks in the hearts of girly girls?

laika's picture

CARL JUNG DO!

I'm lazy, so here's some Wikipedia stuff about the Jungian Shadow:
In Jungian psychology, the "shadow," "Id," or "shadow aspect/archetype" may refer to an unconscious aspect of the personality which the conscious ego does not identify in itself. In short, the shadow is the "dark side".

Because one tends to reject or remain ignorant of the least desirable aspects of one's personality, the shadow is largely negative. There are, however, positive aspects which may also remain hidden in one's shadow (especially in people with low self-esteem, anxieties, and false beliefs). To know yourself, you must accept your dark side. To deal with others' dark sides, you must also know your dark side.

Contrary to a Freudian definition of shadow, therefore, the Jungian shadow can include everything outside the light of consciousness, and may be positive or negative. "Everyone carries a shadow," Jung wrote, "and the less it is embodied in the individual's conscious life, the blacker and denser it is." It may be (in part) one's link to more primitive animal instincts, which are superseded during early childhood by the conscious mind.

Carl Jung stated the shadow to be the unknown dark side of the personality. According to Jung, the shadow, in being instinctive and irrational, is prone to psychological projection, in which a perceived personal inferiority is recognised as a perceived moral deficiency in someone else. Jung writes that if these projections remain hidden, "The projection-making factor (the Shadow archetype) then has a free hand and can realize its object--if it has one--or bring about some other situation characteristic of its power." These projections insulate and harm individuals by acting as a constantly thickening veil of illusion between the ego and the real world.

Jung believed that "in spite of its function as a reservoir for human darkness—or perhaps because of this—the shadow is the seat of creativity"; so that for some, it may be, "the dark side of his being, his sinister shadow...represents the true spirit of life as against the arid scholar..."

Thirty years ago I had a dream I'll never forget. I mean talk about sick and creepy! I had killed somebody, for some reason I couldn't remember, but I knew it wasn't self defense, and I had this corpse I had to get rid of. I happened to be at my parents house in my old hometown, and I knew there was a trapdoor in the floor of my parents' bedroom closet that my dad had put in to make accessing the pipes and such in the crawlspace easier to get to. So I dragged the dead body in there, opened the hatch- AND THERE WERE ALL THESE DEAD BODIES UNDER THERE!!! I was a serial killer and didn't even know it.

I'm really really glad this was the only time I ever had that dream; and I'm pretty sure I don't harbor homicidal urges. But that's the Shadow side for you. And it would make a pretty cool horror story...

In short Darlin', everybody has dreams like this. And everybody's a much worse person than they try to project, in the blackest part of their id; But where it counts often a much better person than they give themselves credit for.
~huggles (as Dorothy backs slowly away), Veronica
.

(Take from the above what you will. I'm not a philosopher or a psychologist. I view all these conflicting schools of psychology and philosophical systems as "tools of perspective"- useful in some applications and downright silly in others/ And that when it comes to humans especially there is no one single batch of ideas that explains everything. I do like Jung better than Freud, but trying to wrap the whole of life and consciousness and society and God up into some great universal Theory of Everything that's always true is a mug's game...)

I had a dark dream about myself

Patricia Marie Allen's picture

Years ago, I was into CB radio pretty heavily. I had a CB mounted under my dash in my car and a white face Tempo transceiver (a Ham radio set operating at 240 watts PEP) with an eleven meter crystal in it as a base station with an inverted V antennae from a tower on top of my house. My mobile was a 40 channel single side band, tweaked and peaked with funny channels. (An unauthorized modification that allowed my to communicate outside the CB frequencies. Yes, that's not quite in accordance of the rules regulating CB radio, but neither is transmitting on 240 watt base station either.)

In my dream, I stopped by a convenience mart near my home and upon exiting the store, I caught someone with his head and shoulders inside the front door of my car stealing the CB. I yanked him out and knocked him down. I don't know where I got it, but I sat on his stomach and stabbed him repeatedly in the throat with a dinner fork in an effort to kill him.

I woke up when I realized I wanted him dead. Apparently my dark side is very hawkish in punishing law breakers. As I look back, I've become so in my conscious thoughts, though not to the extreme of making stealing a CB radio a capital crime.

Hugs
Patricia

Happiness is being all dressed up and HAVING some place to go.
Semper in femineo gerunt

We all have dark sides

Angharad's picture

It's part of being human, part of being a decent human is learning to live with it but not allowing it to dictate your thoughts or actions.

Angharad

Self awareness…

Rhona McCloud's picture

… may have evolved so that we can lie to ourselves and so better deceive others. On the other hand awareness that we might lie to ourselves leads to … ? Guess you'll have to accept Dorothy, that like other women you have the the ability to believe several contradictory things at the same time.

Rhona McCloud