Aggressively, we all defend the role we play

Think of this question, who are you? In most situations the answer would be the person gives the name and the say I am and you can fill in the blank with: job title, mom, father, sister brother, lover, husband, teacher, student, wife,man/woman on the side, acquaintance, friend or best friend among many other.

When I had a lot fewer grey hairs a philosophy professor asked us that and he called on me. I told him my name and I am human. The question was the start of a discussion in class about self-identification. How if people are not careful they can let others define who they are instead of themselves.

People should not put too much emphasis and yet too many times too many people do. They let the role define who they are instead of letting who they are define the role.In making the role defined you, a person is now letting expectation of others be a factor in their decision makings. Instead of doing what they want, they do what they assume other people think they would. This leads to people not being who they are, but what they think society see of them.

It also leads to us defending actions which are really out of character for who we really are. People do not take true ownership of their actions if they do it based on what they feel others expect rather than it was what they felt was the right course of action. It leads to people not feeling as proud of their achievements or responsibility for their failures. Their is just a disconnect from the person and the action if it truly does not come from self.

The more the person has their role define who they are the more aggressive they will defend their actions. They need to defend it so they can feel a sense of self in what they did.

People thinking of their role instead of who they are also leads to regrets in their decisions. Even if it decision was the same they would had made, they felt like they were forced. In being forced to do something makes people question if they should had done it. It also leads to a person feeling like it was not them who really did the action.

Lastly being too involved in your role is just an excuse. It is people saying they were following order, just doing their job, doing what people thought they should instead of I did it on my free will. It also allows people to say they did not think their actions through at the time.

Your role should play a part in how you see life and the decisions you make. It should not be a main factor and one allowed it to be who they are instead of just being yourself.

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