1) You know, it's often said that almost EVERYTHING tastes like chicken. If that's truly the case, one has to wonder: Just WHAT does chicken taste like? I mean, you could say it tasted like itself, but that's a poor point of reference, in my opinion, to have something defined recursively like that.

2) Mathematical Proof that Women Are Evil:

OK, most people know that to acquire a good woman takes both time and money. In other words, woman is a PRODUCT of time and money, or mathematically:

WOMAN = TIME x MONEY.

It's also said that time equals money, or mathematically:

TIME = MONEY.

Therefore, WOMAN = MONEY ^ 2 (MONEY squared)

But, since money is the root of all evil (MONEY = √ EVIL)

WOMAN = (√ EVIL)^ 2, OR

WOMAN = EVIL. Q.E.D.

3) The world's shortest Vampire joke:

Three vampires walk into a bar. The fourth one ducks...

4) An honest lawyer, a smart blonde, Santa Claus, a Priest, a Nun, and a Rabbi all walk into a bar together. The bartender turns around, takes one look at the eclectic crowd, and exclaims:

"What is this, some kind of joke?" (A Haylee V Original)