"Transgenderism and BDSM"

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"Transgenderism and BDSM"

I wanted to open a discussion on the article on this subject here because I think that it would be beneficial.

The truth is that T folk come in many flavors and it might be helpful to the psychology of some of us. Our presentation ranges from those who insist that they are women to those who just want to relax at home once in a while. There are those who derive some sexual satisfaction from dressing, and those who like to be punished. As far as I am concerned you are all my sisters in spite of the fact that I come off like a crabby old Nun at times.

When I was a pre-teen I was an "Autogynephile" simply because I accidentally masturbated, and liked it and wanted more. At that time there was no other way to get good feelings and love in my life. It would be many years before I began to understand those feelings. Later I would begin to understand that what I was doing simply scratched the surface on my true nature.

Life was so traumatic when I came out in 2004 that I felt guilty and thought I needed to be punished, though I did not wish to stop exploring my feminine side. I did not realize that the masculine side I was presenting was the pathetic effort of a woman trying to act like a man. My entrance into the Kink community was less than satisfying and eventually, I would move on but not before I discovered Kinky spanking. Over the years it has become clear that such things are best to be done as gentle games with one's lover, and not in a group of kinksters.

It is fairly clear to me now that none of us are just one thing. Much of the time we are just trying to get by.

These days, I don't even think of the kink world, or of any part of my old life. Besides a 68 year old woman is not that appealing to the youngsters. :)

Gwen

Comments

It's Not A Simple Subject

Some years ago, in response to one or another argument in a comment thread, I put together a little presentation called "The Seven Scales of Sex and Sexuality." The effort to try to stuff everyone onto one single-dimensional scale is impossible. We live in the intersection of various scales concerning identity, dominance, presentation, orientation, libido, etc.

My old document still lives HERE.

The simple fact of the matter is that kink and transexuality are entirely separate things. As are the however-many-other scales you can measure people on. Only someone who was 100% vanilla, happy in their own assumptions, and not very observant of people, would think that one thing had something to do with the other. It doesn't.

Exactly

Pippa -

I remember reading this years ago and having the top of my head blow off. This is so well stated. Now if you could get some of the professional psychiatrists to sign off.

Angela Rasch (Jill M I)

Lori Was/Is A Shrink

It's not entirely my original work. It's the product of a therapist's compilation, run through a chat group and chewed over by a few of us. My role was somewhere between a facilitator and a typist.

The original powerpoint presentation this is based on was found on the UC San Francisco website, written by a licensed practitioner (and I think a faculty member) who works in the San Francisco T community. The link I had is dead now, and I don't remember her last name.

Lori Kohler

This seems to be it. Lori Kohler is an MD, and the powerpoint presentation I can find now is about primary care for transsexuals. I'm not sure it's the exact one I found years ago, but page 9 looks awfully familiar -- it's exactly what my document is based on.

http://www.hawaii.edu/hivandaids/Primary%20Care%20for%20Tran...

And here is a more complete version, apparently from the same author, with stuff I've seen before which is missing from the one above, plus some other stuff that must have been added since:

http://bajan.files.wordpress.com/2011/02/primary-care-for-tr...

Not that kind of queer

Patricia Marie Allen's picture

I seem to remember a discussion on the alt.support.crossdressing newsgroup, some years ago, that centered on what kind of queer we might be. For all of us, who look as the "unusualness" of our fellows, we would do well to remember that just because we're not that kind of queer, doesn't mean (with the exception of that mythical 100% vanilla person) that we are quite probably some other kind of queer.

Webster's Revised Unabridged Dictionary (1913 + 1828)
Queer

1. At variance with what is usual or normal; differing in some odd way from what is ordinary; odd; singular; strange; whimsical
2. Mysterious; suspicious; questionable

Yeah, that about sums up my life.

Hugs
Patricia

Happiness is being all dressed up and HAVING some place to go.
Semper in femineo gerunt