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Rhyme Stew - a cautionary tale

Rhyme Stew - A cautionary tale
by mittfh
 
Copyright © 2010 Ben Norwood.
Creative Commons License

This one's even shorter than usual(!)
It's another cautionary (and potentially disturbing) tale set in nursery rhyme land,
but how many rhymes inspired this?

Warning: this tale contains a scene of mollusc genocide!

Transgender children documentary

Found during a link crawl from the "Princess" comic strip (see GeekGirl's earlier blog - here's a handy link), an article covering a (recent?) episode of "The Dr. Oz Show" - a US health issues / investigations show presented by Dr. Mehmet Oz, MD.

http://www.feministing.com/archives/020137.html

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After the fall

After The Fall
by mittfh
 
Copyright © 2010 Ben Norwood.
Creative Commons License

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water,
Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill came tumbling after.

Up Jack got and home did trot as fast as he could caper,
To Old Dame Dob who patched his nob with vinegar and brown paper.

But what happened next? Jack soon finds out that concussion is the least of his problems...

Two Little...Boys?

Two Little...Boys?
by mittfh
 
Copyright © 2010 Ben Norwood.
Creative Commons License

Otherwise known as the perils of listening to Desert Island Discs en-route into work, followed by a very quiet afternoon on the helpdesk...

Oh, and in my desire to always "do something different", I've tried writing this entirely in the present tense. On reflection, I'm not entirely convinced the concept works. Oh well.

PCC & CPS clear Daily Mail over Gately article

Remember a few months ago when Jan Moir wrote an "extremely distasteful" article in the Daily Mail about Stephen Gately's death - and the furious backlash that resulted?

Well, it's been investigated by the Press Complaints Commission (who received 25,000 complaints) and the Crown Prosecution Service (2 complaints), and both have cleared the paper of any wrongdoing.

The watchdog's head said aspects of the piece were "extremely distasteful".

But the PCC said it was an essential point of principle that papers could print views which might offend readers.

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Yet another new career...

Pop quiz: Who has had 125 different occupations over the past 60 years, and has now decided to move into IT?

Here's a visual clue

And here's the answer: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/magazine/8517097.stm

She certainly has an "interesting" taste in workday fashion - black leggings, bright patterned tunic top, and a white sleeveless jacket - coupled with specs, Bluetooth headset and suspiciously perfect hairstyle...

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Yak Breeding for Beginners

(I thought that title would grab your attention! Sadly, it's not original - it's mentioned in a story on this site. All will become clear if you read further!)

I've finally taken a bit of time to do something with a project I started a while back.

The project was inspired by tales told of Yak Breeding (sorry, Wuthering Dormice), and the aim was to skim through the chapters and produce one line summaries of the main event(s) of each. Easier said than done, and I initially gave up after the first 40.

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Love is blind?

It seems as there are some people for whom garments that cover the entire face can be useful/necessary, wherever in the world they may be...

Courtesy of El Reg (an online IT news tabloid) here: http://www.theregister.co.uk/2010/02/10/bearded_lady/

A Dubai man whose fiancée kept her charms hidden under a niqab opted for a quick divorce after his first glimpse beneath the veil revealed she was cross-eyed and sported a beard.

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Goodbye Sam...

Goodbye Sam...
by mittfh
 
Copyright © 2010 Ben Norwood.
Creative Commons License

Contains lyrics from "Goodbye Sam, Hello Samantha", copyright of whoever Cliff's record label was back in 1970...

I mentioned this song when the contest was first proposed. Back then, I claimed I wasn't an author and couldn't imagine myself writing anything. Just over a month later, I've somehow got three stories up here and another in the works...
So I suppose I'd better do something with these lyrics...

Things Greta Says

If you like the hilarity of the average conversation in Cathy's household in "Bike", you'll probably like this...

Greta is the four year old daughter of UK satirical musician / comedian Mitch Benn and his wife Clara. Like most four year olds, she often produces unintentionally hilarious comments - but whereas in most families these are quickly forgotten, in their household one of the parents will often tweet it for posterity (editing where necessary to fit within the 140 character limit).

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100 Votes - Thanks!

Just a quick "Thank you!" to all who've been reading, voting and commenting on my stories over the past fortnight...

Petra's Outing - 1,762 hits, 101 votes, 35 comments.
Petra: I Will Survive - 229 hits, 18 votes, 2 comments.
The Genie - 1,670 hits, 83 votes, 15 comments.

All together: 3,661 hits, 202 votes, 52 comments.
(Stats as of 3rd Feb, 00:30 GMT)

Yes, my first story, Petra's Outing, has managed to acquire over 100 votes (so that probably translates as at least 50 of you clicking the button), and all three together have accrued over 200.

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Petra: I Will Survive

February Music Motif Challenge
Petra: I Will Survive
by mittfh
 
Copyright © 2010 Ben Norwood.
Creative Commons License

Contains lyrics from "I Will Survive", written by Freddie Perren and Dino Fekaris - © 1978 Polydor Records

Synopsis: I've been mulling over the possibility of writing a sequel to Petra's Outing and doing something for the Challenge, when I realised a perfect opportunity to set the challenge within the context of Petra. This is set "the morning after the night before", at Kim's flat.

N.B. Think of this as a cut scene from Petra: The Aftermath, the (as yet unwritten) sequel to Petra's Outing, taking place immediately after that story ends.

N.N.B. This is completely unedited - this is more-or-less a stream of conciousness. Gedit thinks it's spelled correctly, but whether it makes any grammatical sense or is properly punctuated is another matter entirely... :)

Pope attacks UK Equality Bill

(Saw this article at work, and decided to be very naughty and beat Angharad to blogging about it!)

See http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/8492597.stm
or http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/8493280.stm
(effectively the same article, just rephrased slightly.)

The Pope has urged Catholic bishops in England and Wales to fight the UK's Equality Bill with "missionary zeal".

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Sizing

Without revealing the plot, the latest short story I'm dabbling at involves an adult male and female of broadly similar size (height, build etc.), swapping clothes (the exact circumstances and relationship between the two is part of the plot, but irrelevant to my question below) with the intention of being fairly passable (at night!).

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Not as dirty as it sounds...

The video's entitled "Penis and Pussy", but don't let that put you off - it's a crafty attempt at misdirection, as although the images the artist draws in this film start off looking like the aforementioned body parts, as he continues drawing the image becomes completely innocuous...

http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=KuSWqJ7sevM

...just don't follow the related videos, as YT highlights the inadequacies of automatic algorithms...

(Another oddity - I suspect the artist may be right handed, but he's flipped the video...)

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The Genie

The Genie
by mittfh
 
Copyright © 2010 Ben Norwood.
Creative Commons License

Special thanks to Holly H Hart for approving the first draft (~700 words) and Angela Rasch for suggesting improvements...
as a result, this is now over 2,300 words!

Synopsis: It's just a typical spring morning for John, as he arrives at Cartwright Collectibles for his Saturday job. But an unexpected encounter with a creature he thought only existed in legend leads to a life-changing decision...

Peter/Petra - Background info

Since I've fallen victim to the curse of the short story writer (a rather deafening blast of "Encore! Sequel!"), while I await inspiration for where I can take the story further, I thought I'd share my thoughts on the characters - which may be of use if anyone decides to write their own tale featuring them (hint, hint!)

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New research: Blondes more aggressive than darker haired women

Women with fair hair are more aggressive and determined to get their own way than brunettes or redheads, according to a study by the University of California.

Researchers claim that blondes are more likely to display a “warlike” streak because they attract more attention than other women and are used to getting their own way – the so-called “princess effect”.

Even those who dye their hair blonde quickly take on these attributes, experts found.
Times: http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/science/genetics/artic...

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Petra 1: Petra's Outing

Petra 1: Petra's Outing
by mittfh
 
Copyright © 2010 Ben Norwood.
Creative Commons License

Synopsis: Lydia has encouraged her partner to cross dress at home when she was absent, with the intention of using hidden camera footage to blackmail him into obeying her desires. However, Peter had suspected she was up to something, and had made plans of his own...

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